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Does suppressing the urge to toot endanger one's health?
The Straight Dope ^ | April 26, 1985 | Cecil Adams

Posted on 09/24/2010 4:03:29 PM PDT by EveningStar

Dear Cecil:

My mother has always told me that the real way to spell relief is f-a-r-t. I have always been a person closely attuned to what is truly natural in myself and others and would appreciate an answer to a problem that has haunted me since childhood.

If gas pains are caused by intestinal gas, then how come I never feel better when I fart? All I ever feel is embarrassed.

— Lauran P., Washington, D.C.

(Excerpt) Read more at straightdope.com ...


TOPICS: Health/Medicine; Science
KEYWORDS: fart; health; napl; passinggas
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To: EveningStar
Ripping a large loud fart in the right company (deer camp, hanging out with your brothers) is very satisfying and is always good for a laugh. It even brings out others competitive spirit.

You just have to be careful not to shart yourself.

41 posted on 09/24/2010 4:56:57 PM PDT by mickey finn
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To: dfwgator
Beans, beans,
the musical fruit

The more you eat,
the more you toot.

The more you toot,
the better you feel.

So eat your beans
at every meal!

42 posted on 09/24/2010 4:59:30 PM PDT by bankwalker (In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.)
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To: mickey finn

the dreaded hershey squirt


43 posted on 09/24/2010 5:00:27 PM PDT by McBuff
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To: mickey finn

Yup, gunning it too hard can create soot around the tailpipe.....


44 posted on 09/24/2010 5:04:53 PM PDT by Quickgun (As a former fetus, I'm opposed to abortion. Mamas don't let your cowboys grow up to be babies..)
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To: EveningStar

I dunno about health but my ex never tooted and everyone knows she has brain damage.


45 posted on 09/24/2010 5:05:23 PM PDT by winodog
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To: McBuff

Here I sit
Broken Hearted

Paid my dime
And only farted


46 posted on 09/24/2010 5:08:30 PM PDT by dfwgator (Rangers Magic Number - 4)
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To: dynachrome

It’s still around but some of the older articles are real classics. LOL. :)


47 posted on 09/24/2010 5:20:40 PM PDT by EveningStar (Karl Marx is not one of our Founding Fathers.)
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To: VR-21

You dog!

My husband says holding it in COULD KILL YOU. I always ask how he manages in his big, important meetings. He never has an answer!


48 posted on 09/24/2010 5:24:01 PM PDT by Pigsley
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To: EveningStar

She needs to learn how to ease them out. Technique is important. Find an empty isle at the grocery store and slowly walk down it while silently letting it out.

Then...wait down at the end and watch the facial expressions as people come down the isle.


49 posted on 09/24/2010 5:30:01 PM PDT by ChildOfThe60s (If you can remember the 60s, you weren't really there.)
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To: Pigsley
"I always ask how he manages in his big, important meetings."

Brings to mind that scene from Blazing Saddles.

50 posted on 09/24/2010 5:34:14 PM PDT by VR-21
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To: bankwalker

This will become relevant because of Obama’s Beans and Weenies economy.


51 posted on 09/24/2010 5:36:06 PM PDT by sportutegrl
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To: ChildOfThe60s

“watch the facial expressions as people come down the isle”

I guy I worked with called them “air biscuits”.

hehe.


52 posted on 09/24/2010 6:08:02 PM PDT by dynachrome ("Our forefathers didn't bury their guns. They buried those that tried to take them.")
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To: Spartan79

I once had an aunt that needed to see Dr. McGee but she had passed on, so all is fresh and silent in our part of woods.


53 posted on 09/24/2010 6:08:35 PM PDT by Tamatoa (Fight for our America, Fight for our Country I fought to defend!!!)
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To: JennysCool

I lol’d. But here is the best of the genre as far as I can tell:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y9KM_EERQtY&feature=related


54 posted on 09/24/2010 6:20:30 PM PDT by Yardstick
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To: EveningStar

Women “toot”, men “fart”.

When a woman toots, she just stinks up the room.

For us guys it’s a completive thing, similar to the sport we played as little boys—who could spit the furthest. It’s all a matter of pride.

So, not farting or being allowed to spit could erode our self-esteem, and completive drive. It is that competitive drive that got us to leave the caves and it has seen us through the battles of war.

I am man, hear me fart.........


55 posted on 09/24/2010 7:31:46 PM PDT by Gator113 (Beauty will devour the Beast in 2012. Kill "Obamamosque"@ Ground Zero)
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To: fanfan; EveningStar; MeekOneGOP; Conspiracy Guy; DocRock; King Prout; Darksheare; OSHA; ...
Geisundheit!


56 posted on 09/24/2010 9:19:31 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have IngSoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: bankwalker; dfwgator
...the musical fruit...

That's the way my dad used to say it.

57 posted on 09/25/2010 4:55:17 AM PDT by TheOldLady (Pablo is very wily.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Hubby, his brother, and their friends used to have burping contests using Alka-seltzer and Coke. Talking in the “devil voice” was the highlight of the contest.


58 posted on 09/25/2010 5:01:19 AM PDT by TheOldLady (Pablo is very wily.)
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To: AdmSmith; Arthur Wildfire! March; Berosus; bigheadfred; blueyon; Convert from ECUSA; dervish; ...

I’m gassing this will be entertaining.


59 posted on 09/25/2010 6:11:01 AM PDT by SunkenCiv (Democratic Underground... matters are worse, as their latest fund drive has come up short...)
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To: TheOldLady

The artistic impulse will not be silenced.


60 posted on 09/25/2010 1:04:04 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have IngSoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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