Posted on 01/09/2015 9:21:21 PM PST by John Semmens
Taking heed of the nation's lowest workforce participation rates since the 1970s, President Obama suggested a plan for government funding of community college for every high school student with a C average or better.
"We have liberated more people from wage slavery than any prior administration," Obama boasted. "While this, in itself, is a remarkable achievement we shouldn't rest on our laurels. We need to go the next step."
Why free community college would be the "next step" was explained by the President's assertion that "going to college is a great experience that no one should be denied just because they can't afford it. It's not like the old days when students were pressured by heavy workloads, term papers, and difficult exams. We've come to realize that this 'nose to the grindstone' approach is no longer required. In the coming years computers will do all the complicated work. Students needn't learn more than which buttons to push to get the machines running."
"Unlike a job, being a student doesn't cut into your free time," the President remembered. "There's plenty of opportunities to hang out, socialize, go to basketball games, and even smoke some weed. You don't have to put up with customers demanding service or a boss insisting that you earn your pay. It's a lifestyle that I enjoyed and highly recommend. We need, as a society, to make this experience as widely available as we can."
Cecilia Muñoz, director of the White House Domestic Policy Council, estimated that the President's plan would benefit 9 million students at a cost of around $30 billion per year. "To be able to give this kind of life experience to so many of our young people is both affordable and the right thing to do," Muñoz said. "Scrooges who carp about the cost are forgetting that the government will be paying for everything. So, there'll be no drag on the economy."
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,158859.0.html
ping
can you imagine the strings attached?
“Okay, congrats you graduated from community college and it was free.... now you have to work for it.... welcome to the National Civilian Army! Basic training time, get on the bus!”
How about this for a new masthead?...
Je Suis Semi-Satire
next thing you know he will want to pay students a living wage
Do I get to pick which Community College Obama will buy for me? Is there one in Malibu?
Some guy on twitter posted today, “Why does Obama want to send people to college? Isn’t that where they are getting raped?”
They can’t even interest these kids in finishing “free” high school. Who in the hell thinks they would be interested in “free” college? Sometimes things cost money for a reason.
That’s the beauty of it for the professionally lazy. They wouldn’t have to graduate. They just have to hang around for two more years. Since they’ll be over 18 and legally independent, will they be eligible for housing subsidies, food stamps, ObamaPhones and Medicare? How about free bus transportation to and from campus? The possibilities are endless.
***
Which is exactly how Obama spent his college years.
Brilliant and right on the mark again, John. Thank you for the ping.
Sounds about right!
"Casting pearls before swine". Just trying to buy future elections at taxpayer's expense.
You have perfectly captured the “complicated” thoughts of our learned president...... “Go to college, get high”!
Hahaha! Great line!
Just convince the Department of Education to use its clout to force Pepperdine University to meet the Obama Administration's standards. You'll have your Mailbu Community College in a few months.
Good one John.
The next area of free anything must involve the ethic that is instilled in our youth.
Everything is yours and it is free.
The reality is a severe setback to their understanding of real life.
This is what we are up against. Obama promises the moon and delivers dog shit.
Well done, sir.
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