Welcome Friends, foes and associates to the completely remodeled Free Republic...
Smoker's Lounge
Posted on 05/03/2002 9:57:12 AM PDT by Just another Joe
Welcome Friends, foes and associates to the completely remodeled Free Republic...
Smoker's Lounge
Here you will find a comfy place to smoke, drink, joke or whatever. We always have a great time, so sit back, relax and...
Make it an Anchor Steam, if you please.
I took wife to see Spiderman. I loved it. But be forwarned. No sex. Minimal violence.
That being said, I would first like to alert all in the Smoker's Lounge to a news item I found.
Sort of makes me proud to be an American.
--------------------------------------------
http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2002/05/02/1019441406441.html
US sailors wear out sex workers
Perth May 2 2002
Perth prostitutes were reeling from exhaustion following an influx of United States sailors stressed from a stint in a war zone, a well-known madam said today.
Mary-Anne Kenworthy said she was forced to close the doors of her famous Langtrees brothel for only the third time ever yesterday because her prostitutes were so worn out they could no longer provide a quality service.
When she realised the sex workers just couldn't cope any more she closed Langtrees doors for a day rather than risk the brothel's reputation.
"We're the biggest and the best, I'd rather take nothing than offer a poor service," Ms Kenworthy said.
Langtrees did a week's business in just three days after 5,500 American sailors disembarked in Fremantle on Sunday, many of them stressed from their encounter with war, she said.
Three US warships - the aircraft carrier USS John C Stennis, the guided missile cruiser USS Port Royal and the fast combat support ship USS Bridge - were returning from taking part in the war against terror.
"A lot of it was stress, they'd been in the war zone," Ms Kenworthy said.
"And they were a lot more agitated sexually because they'd been at sea too long.
"All the sex workers in Perth would have been exhausted."
Ms Kenworthy said she had to close the doors when she realised some sex workers were taking money when they were not up to the job.
"The girls were starting to refuse to have sex but still wanted money just for taking their clothes off."
Ms Kenworthy said she wished the US sailors would arrive in smaller numbers.
"I just wish they could dribble-feed the Yanks in, fly a thousand off at a time," she said.
"We usually find the Yanks are hard work but lots of fun, this time they needed the company too."
Ms Kenworthy said the last time she closed the brothel's doors was on December 31, 1999 - so the girls could party.
AAP
------------------------------------------------------
Later I will post a few jokes. Loved the ones already here.
A man and woman where on their honeymoon after a long and very happy courtship. On their honeymoon, they decide to take their horses through the beautiful mountain passes of Europe.
As the horses were crossing a small stream, the woman's horse mis-steps and jostles the man's wife. Once across the stream, the man dismounts, walks over to the horse, and stares into its eyes. Finally, he states, "That's one." The man remounts his horse and they continue their ride.
A bit further down the path, the woman's horse stumbles when stepping over a fallen tree. The man dismounts, stares the horse in the eyes, and boldly states, "That's two!" He returns to his saddle and they move on.
As the afternoon sun began to set, the woman's horse once again lost its footing on a mossy slope. The man dismounts, moves to the woman's horse, and helps his wife out of the saddle the man. Moving to the front of the horse he stares it in the eyes and firmly says, "That's three," removes a pistol from his vest, and shoots the horse dead.
The woman, quite upset at seeing the beautiful horse killed, says to her husband, "That's terrible, why would you do such a thing!"
The man stares at his wife and firmly says, "That's one!"
A good pun is its own reword.
Energizer Bunny arrested - charged with battery.
A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative.
My wife really likes to make pottery, but to me it's just kiln time.
Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.
Practice safe eating - always use condiments.
I fired my masseuse today. She just rubbed me the wrong way.
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.
I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.
I used to be a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
If electricity comes from electrons... does that mean that morality comes from morons?
A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.
Marriage is the mourning after the knot before.
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
Corduroy pillows are making headlines.
Is a book on voyeurism a peeping tome?
Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.
Banning the bra was a big flop.
Sea captains don't like crew cuts.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
A gossip is someone with a great sense of rumor.
Without geometry, life is pointless.
When you dream in color, it's a pigment of your imagination.
Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.
Reading whilst sunbathing makes you well-red.
When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.
Some pompous freeper named Thomas Jefferson called xsmommy a National Socialist toward the end of this thread. I had to go to a meeting, but Max stood up for her.
A mathematician named Hall
Had a hexahedronical ball
The cube of its weight
Plus his pecker times eight
Is his phone number - give him a call!
I've gotta get back to the drudgery, Tex, I'll probably see you in about 3 hours if you're still around.
I would be very, very grateful....
It has been a hell of a week.
We had a problem a few years ago with a rat working its way up from our Cape Cod cellar (semi-round dirt hole under the house) along the pigtail connection for our electric stove (What's that noise?).
Poured about 2 tons of D-Con in the cellar and the noise inexplicably stopped.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.