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CNN: 'Clumsy Trump Hits Head On Bullet'
Babylon Bee ^ | Jul 13, 2024 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 07/15/2024 8:44:11 AM PDT by dayglored

U.S. — CNN announced today that in a shocking incident, former President Trump clumsily hit his head on a bullet, causing an unfortunate disturbance at a Pennsylvania rally.

"What a klutz, that Trump! Probably worse then Biden," said Anderson Cooper. "Look at all that blood from smacking his face on a bullet. Boy, I bet he feels sheepish."

CNN reported Trump smacked his ear on the harmless bullet at incredible velocity, causing a loud sound like a gunshot. "The helpless little bullet never saw it coming," announced Cooper. "Trump then fell over, forcing several Secret Service agents to dive on top of him to cover for his stumble. An embarrassing day all around."

At publishing time, CNN had updated its report to announce that a person was attacked by Secret Service as a "shooter" in a vain attempt to cover for Trump's clumsiness.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; bullet; clintonnonnews; cnn; pennsylvania; satire; trump
Bee Alert...
1 posted on 07/15/2024 8:44:11 AM PDT by dayglored
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To: dayglored

LOL the Bee sure does sting


2 posted on 07/15/2024 8:45:28 AM PDT by MNJohnnie (Don't blame me, my congressman is MTG!)
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To: dayglored

And suddenly Dems liked guns again.


3 posted on 07/15/2024 8:46:33 AM PDT by SaxxonWoods (Are you ready for Black Lives MAGA? It's coming.)
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To: dayglored

After his caretakers helped him to his feet, Trump instinctively called for violent sedition, repeating a word previously used by Hitler: “Fight! Fight! Fight!”


4 posted on 07/15/2024 8:49:53 AM PDT by UnwashedPeasant (The pandemic we suffer from is not COVID. It is Marxist Democrat Leftism.)
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To: dayglored

The early reports from CNN said that Trump “claims” to have been shot (without evidence).


5 posted on 07/15/2024 8:50:30 AM PDT by libertylover (Our biggest problem, by far, is that almost all of big media is AGENDA-DRIVEN, not-truth driven.)
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To: SaxxonWoods

Watched SKY news and the left meltdown is unbelievable! Actually quite disturbing! They can’t be real people!??? LARP?


6 posted on 07/15/2024 8:50:53 AM PDT by griswold3 (Truth, Beauty and Goodness. )
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To: SaxxonWoods

“And suddenly Dems liked guns again.”

The range is going to be busy this week.


7 posted on 07/15/2024 8:51:32 AM PDT by READINABLUESTATE (‘Never trust a man whose uncle was eaten by cannibals’)
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To: All

“Trump fell over as a harmless itty-bitty bullet whizzed past his ear, forcing several Secret Service agents to dive on top of him to cover-up his stumble. One female agent even broke a just-manicured nail.”


8 posted on 07/15/2024 8:52:44 AM PDT by Liz (This then is how we should pray : Our Father who art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name . )
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To: dayglored

The Bee needs an article outlining how old man Trump has to be helped off the stage too!

Except for one detail. Despite 4 agents trying to man handle him offstage - they didn’t do it.

Trump got up, raised his fist in defiance, and left the stage on his own. Dragging 4 agents along for the ride.

It hurts my heart to watch that video. But it thrills my heart to see his powerful exit stage left.


9 posted on 07/15/2024 8:54:47 AM PDT by Responsibility2nd (A truth that's told with bad intent, Beats all the lies you can invent ~ Wm. Blake)
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To: READINABLUESTATE; SaxxonWoods
>> “And suddenly Dems liked guns again.”

> The range is going to be busy this week.

Gonna be an exciting summer. Feels kinda like '68 all over again. Candidates getting shot, Dem convention in Chicago, all that.

10 posted on 07/15/2024 8:54:56 AM PDT by dayglored (Strange Women Lying In Ponds Distributing Swords! Arthur Pendragon in 2024)
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To: Responsibility2nd
The Bee needs an article outlining how old man Trump has to be helped off the stage too!

Not to mention government incompetence, as in 75 secret service agents, the head of the SS, DOJ and CIA arrange for the assassination and they fail.

11 posted on 07/15/2024 8:57:04 AM PDT by 1Old Pro
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To: libertylover

It has been alleged that Trump was shot. By an alleged gunman who allegedly inflicted a wound to Trump’s alleged ear.

The said alleged gunman is allegedly dead.

/newsspeak


12 posted on 07/15/2024 8:57:54 AM PDT by Responsibility2nd (A truth that's told with bad intent, Beats all the lies you can invent ~ Wm. Blake)
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To: dayglored

“Gonna be an exciting summer. “

Be careful out there.


13 posted on 07/15/2024 9:03:56 AM PDT by READINABLUESTATE (‘Never trust a man whose uncle was eaten by cannibals’)
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To: dayglored
CNN: 'Clumsy Trump Hits Head On Bullet'

Then falls down for no reason.

14 posted on 07/15/2024 9:08:00 AM PDT by Steely Tom ([Voter Fraud] == [Civil War])
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To: dayglored

I have been saying for years that the Bee’s staff is totally insane! I LOVE it!

ROFLMAOASTD


15 posted on 07/15/2024 9:08:16 AM PDT by spel_grammer_an_punct_polise (We are very sorry, Mr. Franklin. We were not able to keep it! ;-()
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To: dayglored

😅


16 posted on 07/15/2024 9:24:39 AM PDT by Georgia Girl 2 (The only purpose of a pistol is to fight your way back to the rifle you should never have dropped)
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To: dayglored

The Bee is GOOD!


17 posted on 07/15/2024 9:36:11 AM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus…)
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To: dayglored

lol. The Bee is always sooooooo close to the truth.


18 posted on 07/15/2024 9:52:28 AM PDT by CodeToad (Rule #1: The elites want you dead.)
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To: dayglored

LOL


19 posted on 07/15/2024 10:05:29 AM PDT by grimalkin (Communism is the final logic of the dehumanization of man. -Fulton J. Sheen)
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To: dayglored

I saw on another network that CNN reported that Trump fell-—making it sound like he was a clumsy or sickly fool.
Apparently for a significant time.
So biased.

I had the TV on Fox News and looked down at my laptop a few seconds and then thought “why did he stop speaking?” and I looked up and saw the chaos and heard “something has happened. Something involving Donald Trump is happening.”

Then the blood and the rest of the scene.
I went into full fury of rage and vowed to fight the last Democrat and Communist to my last breath.

God spared his life. For which we will be thankful to the end of our days.


20 posted on 07/15/2024 10:33:03 AM PDT by frank ballenger (There's a battle outside and it's raging. It'll soon shake your windows and rattle your walls.)
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