Quick -- call the cops!!! (We caught him hugging his Grandma!!!)
Posted on 11/26/2020 12:20:55 PM PST by dynachrome
Question: “If I don’t narc on my neighbors, am I a traitor to my country?”
Answer: Absolutely, friend! Unproven science proves that we can only achieve a lower Coronavirus mortality rate if we stick together by reporting on our neighbors, family, and friends. We must ALL share the same beliefs and obey our government. That’s how it works in North Korea, and they haven’t had a single death from Coronavirus yet!
Question: “I’m Catholic. I have eight kids plus my spouse. I don’t want to go to federal prison for several decades if we happen to get caught eating a large meal at home after being advised by the CDC for several months to stay out of restaurants and eat meals at home. What should I do?”
Answer: Evaluate your children. Which two do you like the least? Throw them out into the cold before the Thanksgiving holiday. You can let them back into the house when things are safe again on Friday at 12 am.
Question: “Our mother-in-law lives with us too. What now?” Answer: Put your mother-in-law in the garage, preferably with a space heater.
Question: “I don’t have a space heater.”
Answer: Improvise by using the heater in your family SUV.
**Please Note: Do NOT start the engine in your SUV until you’ve taken the proper safety precautions.
Close garage door to maximize heating efficiency. Securely attach a garden hose to your muffler with at least two (2) medium-sized zip ties. Detach opposite end of garden hose from the water spigot. Point the open end of the garden hose AWAY your home to avoid potential contamination of your treasured landscaping. Monitor your garage and “check-in” on an hourly basis to ensure your SUV hasn’t run out of gas and left your mother-in-law vulnerable to the freezing temperatures.
(Excerpt) Read more at wibc.com ...
“...the number of rats and karens that have come out of the wood work is astounding...”
They’ve been there all along just waiting for opportunities. They are called democrats.
I have good neighbors but one. If they respected anyone around them it would go a long way towards better relationships.
There is one in every crowd..
....and 77% of those narched on would open fire on their neighbors.
I have had a few moments of folks not keeping their distance, but found a low gravely 'Get the F away from me' works just fine. I would never waste a police officers time that way.
LOL As long as they ain’t blocking my driveway if I have to make a beer run, I don’t care how many people the neighbors have over for a feast. And I would appreciate their reciprocity, as a gesture of goodwill.
Go ahead, turn me in! I’m home alone and cooking hotdogs for Thanksgiving.......
Well, if you work them just right, you can form them babies into a turkey!
(Happy Thanksgiving!)
And the shelves of some big stores are devoid of toilet paper. That would motivate social distancing in extended tribal gatherings.
;)
Now, you can tell your holiday guests to BYOTP ...... Bring Your Own Toilet Paper.
Bring Your Own Toilet Paper.
= = = = = = = = =
AND an extra roll or two for the host.
Definitely accept paper towels,
I wonder how many plumbers got rich when the TP ran out and the fools started using Paper Towels that wouldn’t/couldn’t flush.....
.
Very East German of these Dems ....
.
We are stuck with as many communists here as in any communist country.
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