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GIVING THANKS FOR THANKSGIVING NARCS: 36% WOULD TURN IN NEIGHBORS FOR VIOLATING SOCIAL DISTANCING
93.3FMWIBC ^ | 11-24-20 | Brian Baker

Posted on 11/26/2020 12:20:55 PM PST by dynachrome

Question: “If I don’t narc on my neighbors, am I a traitor to my country?”

Answer: Absolutely, friend! Unproven science proves that we can only achieve a lower Coronavirus mortality rate if we stick together by reporting on our neighbors, family, and friends. We must ALL share the same beliefs and obey our government. That’s how it works in North Korea, and they haven’t had a single death from Coronavirus yet!

Question: “I’m Catholic. I have eight kids plus my spouse. I don’t want to go to federal prison for several decades if we happen to get caught eating a large meal at home after being advised by the CDC for several months to stay out of restaurants and eat meals at home. What should I do?”

Answer: Evaluate your children. Which two do you like the least? Throw them out into the cold before the Thanksgiving holiday. You can let them back into the house when things are safe again on Friday at 12 am.

Question: “Our mother-in-law lives with us too. What now?” Answer: Put your mother-in-law in the garage, preferably with a space heater.

Question: “I don’t have a space heater.”

Answer: Improvise by using the heater in your family SUV.

**Please Note: Do NOT start the engine in your SUV until you’ve taken the proper safety precautions.

Close garage door to maximize heating efficiency. Securely attach a garden hose to your muffler with at least two (2) medium-sized zip ties. Detach opposite end of garden hose from the water spigot. Point the open end of the garden hose AWAY your home to avoid potential contamination of your treasured landscaping. Monitor your garage and “check-in” on an hourly basis to ensure your SUV hasn’t run out of gas and left your mother-in-law vulnerable to the freezing temperatures.

(Excerpt) Read more at wibc.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Health/Medicine; Humor; Society
KEYWORDS: narc; satire; thanksgiving
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To: warsaw44

“...the number of rats and karens that have come out of the wood work is astounding...”

They’ve been there all along just waiting for opportunities. They are called democrats.


21 posted on 11/26/2020 1:58:03 PM PST by Bonemaker (invictus maneo)
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To: glimmerman70

I have good neighbors but one. If they respected anyone around them it would go a long way towards better relationships.


22 posted on 11/26/2020 2:10:14 PM PST by Clutch Martin (The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed right.)
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To: Clutch Martin

There is one in every crowd..


23 posted on 11/26/2020 2:17:53 PM PST by glimmerman70
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To: dynachrome

....and 77% of those narched on would open fire on their neighbors.


24 posted on 11/26/2020 2:22:04 PM PST by The MAGA-Deplorian (It is the Trump way! It is the only way!)
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To: Maudeen
36% WOULD TURN IN NEIGHBORS FOR VIOLATING SOCIAL DISTANCING

I have had a few moments of folks not keeping their distance, but found a low gravely 'Get the F away from me' works just fine. I would never waste a police officers time that way.

25 posted on 11/26/2020 2:24:27 PM PST by redcatcherb412
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To: dynachrome

LOL As long as they ain’t blocking my driveway if I have to make a beer run, I don’t care how many people the neighbors have over for a feast. And I would appreciate their reciprocity, as a gesture of goodwill.


26 posted on 11/26/2020 2:39:48 PM PST by Viking2002 (When aliens fly past Earth, they probably lock their doors.)
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To: dynachrome

Quick -- call the cops!!!   (We caught him hugging his Grandma!!!)


       

27 posted on 11/26/2020 2:45:25 PM PST by Songcraft
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To: dynachrome

28 posted on 11/26/2020 3:00:09 PM PST by knarf (I say things that are true ..... I have no proof, but they're true.)
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To: dynachrome

Go ahead, turn me in! I’m home alone and cooking hotdogs for Thanksgiving.......


29 posted on 11/26/2020 3:01:37 PM PST by Hot Tabasco
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To: Hot Tabasco

"Go ahead, turn me in! I’m home alone and cooking hotdogs for Thanksgiving......."


Well, if you work them just right, you can form them babies into a turkey!


       


(Happy Thanksgiving!)

30 posted on 11/26/2020 3:08:42 PM PST by Songcraft
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To: dynachrome

And the shelves of some big stores are devoid of toilet paper. That would motivate social distancing in extended tribal gatherings.

;)


31 posted on 11/26/2020 3:16:05 PM PST by familyop
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To: familyop

Now, you can tell your holiday guests to BYOTP ...... Bring Your Own Toilet Paper.


32 posted on 11/26/2020 3:26:11 PM PST by TheUSConstitution matters
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To: TheUSConstitution matters

Bring Your Own Toilet Paper.
= = = = = = = = =
AND an extra roll or two for the host.

Definitely accept paper towels,

I wonder how many plumbers got rich when the TP ran out and the fools started using Paper Towels that wouldn’t/couldn’t flush.....


33 posted on 11/26/2020 3:30:42 PM PST by xrmusn (6/98"HRC is the Grandmother that lures Hansel & Gretel to the pot")
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.

Very East German of these Dems ....

.


34 posted on 11/26/2020 7:04:02 PM PST by elbook
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To: dynachrome

We are stuck with as many communists here as in any communist country.


35 posted on 11/27/2020 10:54:56 PM PST by JimRed (TERM LIMITS, NOW! Build the Wall Faster! TRUTH is the new HATE SPEECH.)
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