Posted on 04/12/2006 11:34:52 AM PDT by Gamecock
Fast on the heels of their impending merger with Sears, Kmart stunned the retail industry this week by announcing their plans to dump their longtime association with Martha Stewart and replace her with Rick Warren, best-selling Christian author of The Purpose-Driven Life. As part of their endeavor to revive their damaged reputation and spur growth, Kmart stores will phase out the Martha Stewart Everyday Collection later this year and introduce the Rick Warren Purpose-Driven Collection, which will reflect the hugely-successful philosophy of the popular pastor.
Featured products in the collection will include a line of mens Hawaiian shirts with matching khaki pants and loafers, personally designed by Warren for the leisurely, suburban churchgoer. Also among the Warren-designed items: Hawaiian print bathroom towels, Hawaiian print kitchen decanters, and a Message Bible that features a fold-out Krispy Kreme donut tray and coffee cup holder.
Asked about the sudden change in direction, Kmart chairman Edward Lampert explained, We just feel that Martha Stewart, despite her recent incarceration, projects a snooty, high-maintenance image that makes the common middle-class housewife feel inadequate. Rick, on the other hand, has a message that says, Hey, God has a purpose for you shopping at Kmart. Plus, have you seen how much money this purpose-driven cr*p is making?
Reaction from business experts has been mixed, with most of them concerned about the possible ramifications of bringing Warrens seeker-sensitive Christianity into an established retail chain. One critic noted that the sudden drop in sales of mens ties and dress socks alone would probably offset any possible profits. Still, Chairman Lambert remains confident. When the idea was first brought up, we thought that there was no way that a church program could be utilized in the retail sector, Lambert explained. But boy were we surprised with how easily it translated to the business world. Who knew?
Nonetheless, some analysts have questioned whether this move will disenfranchise some of Kmarts loyal customers who may not relate to evangelical Christianity. Lambert, however, shrugged it off. Certainly the initial concern was that it might alienate consumers of other religious faiths. But once we realized that the purpose-driven philosophy didnt rely on the Christian view of God, we were tickled to death.
Surprisingly, this isnt the first time that a retail chain has flirted with the idea of marketing themselves with a known Christian celebrity. In 2003, Target had briefly toyed with the idea of using Christian radio apologist Hank Hanegraaff as a spokesman. This idea was dropped, however, when preliminary market research revealed that some listeners and ex-employees of The Bible Answer Man might take a Target logo on Hanegraaffs shirt too literally.
***Rick, on the other hand, has a message that says, Hey, God has a purpose for you shopping at Kmart.***
I guess I better shop at K-Mart.
In an equally stunning move, KMart has also hired Nick Nolte to model the Warren-designed clothing line in their Sunday advertisements....
Does this mean that I won't have to wear socks to church anymore?
If I spend 10% of my gross at KMart do I have to give my tithe on Sunday?
The purpose driven shopper.
Rick Warren rocks, and his book helped me turn my life around.
God Bless him, and those who promote the message of Jesus Christ.
Personally, I find the table next to my chair sufficient to hold my cup of coffee or glass of sodee pop and whatever munchies going when I'm reading ... this is really necessary??
I agree and this just makes his message even better.
You of all people should know that if you find yourself in a K-Mart, that you are there by Divine appointment.
Certainly the initial concern was that it might alienate consumers of other religious faiths. But once we realized that the purpose-driven philosophy didnt rely on the Christian view of God, we were tickled to death.
Sad to say, that is too true.
If this isn't a joke, it should be! Not that I don't agree that they need to dump Martha, but good grief! Rick Warren????
It is.
You of all people should know that if you find yourself in a K-Mart, that you are there by Divine appointment.
For the purposes of God, to the glory of God (but not necessarily your comfort or pleasure).
That's why Rick Warren doesn't take much of the proceeds from his book. He donates the vast majority to charity.
It's true that PDL is a little bit saccharine, and quite basic. But don't let your anti-Warren prejudice lead you to libel him.
I guess I'm doomed to eternal damnation since I won't shop at KMart. Our local store never has more than two employees working at the same time. They either have empty shelves that need restocking or you stand in line forever. Hey, maybe standing in line forever *is* eternal damnation....
CC&E
Well, if they combine this with a 'Made in Religiosly Free Countries' product push, they may just have a new niche.
I'm going to hell. I belong to Sam's Club. |
Won't make me shop at K-Mart.
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