Posted on 02/23/2019 10:08:55 AM PST by knighthawk
WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a statement to D.C. police given Tuesday, senator and presidential candidate Elizabeth Warren claimed that two men in colonial outfits accosted her on the street and assaulted her with smallpox-infected blankets.
Warren claimed she was simply on her evening walk with her favorite peyote blend when the two men leaped out of the bushes, fired a round, spent several minutes reloading their muzzle-loading rifles, fired again, and then hollered "battle cries" as they hurled smallpox-infested blankets at her.
"The men fired muskets at me, threw several blankets infested with smallpox in my general direction, and told me this was colonial country," she said, holding back tears. "They told me to go back to my reservation and that I wasn't welcome here."
According to Warren, the men stuck a feather in her hair and then called her "macaroni" before dancing around her in a mock Native American rain dance.
"It is just despicable to me that in 2019 a woman can still be targeted for lynching because of her .0001% Indian heritage," she said in a press conference. "This is Trump's America, people."
Police quickly poked holes in Warren's story, such as the fact that she never dropped her peace pipe throughout the ordeal and that she left the smallpox blankets and mock Indian headdress on herself as she walked to the police department to make her statement.
Nigerians. If Liz had only given them her banking information she’d be a rich woman now.
Maybe it was the mascots from the National’s baseball team.
Boilermaker!
;^)
In the Revolutionary War a dark blue stocking cap with a tassel was a “Liberty cap”, imitating the Phrygian liberty cap of antiquity. It symbolized the insurgent United States & could be called the MAGA cap of its day.
Does that beer have a .1024% alcohol content?
Some reporter needs to remind Liz about HISTORY
Would she have hijacked the Cherokee tribe If she knew they
owned African slaves and fought for the confederacy??
The story is here
http://jesusweptanamericanstory.blogspot.com/
She drinks it the same way Injun Joe drank it,..from the bottle. Besides, the bottle is glass so who needs another?
BTT
I drink it straight from the can.
Rumor has it that they also put a bunch of cigars in her hand and made her stand in front of a convenience store.
bump
Lol!!
BWHAHAHAHAHA!
Great!
Make two holes and you can drink it faster.
You need to come to my neck of the woods. I don’t know any women who drink beer from a glass anymore. Course, we are stinky deplorables, dontcha know...
The two men proceeded to dump tea in the harbor and blame her for it. One had lacerations from a bad haircut and claimed she tried to scalp him.
Great imagination and clever !
Many Thanx
One Ol’ ‘wooden shoe” to another....
Was wondering if anyone would take the bait. I obviously agree with you.
Dang it! Suckered again. Sorry.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.