Posted on 03/30/2006 12:41:35 PM PST by twippo
Someone needs to sit our people down and have a healthy discussion about the names we as African Americans are giving our children. We are hurting our kids and putting their futures in peril from the moment they are born.
That’s right, I said it. We are KILLING our kids and crippling their futures with the names we give them. Don’t you want your kids to get JOBS someday? Good jobs, and serious careers? With a name like Jaquez Ja’Quan Diante’, you’re dooming your sons to a life of drug dealing on some seedy street corner.
Our Black men face enough challenges. I do not subscribe to the notion that we are giving our children names that “convey pride in their African Heritage”. We’re way off the mark. I’ve got dear friends from all over Africa, and their children have beautiful cultural names like Akos, Ama, and Fia.
Notice how neither of those names had a “quita” in it? Or an “eisha”? Or more than four syllables? That’s because even in the motherland, they don’t give their kids the crazy names that we do in Black America. Many Africans even RESENT the implication that these names stem from their culture. I’ve yet to meet anyone from any African nation named Shaquandiniquah Takei’sha, or any other of the ‘colorful’ monikers we’re pinning on brand new precious lives.
Parents, we are stacking the odds against our children from birth. We’ve been doing it for generations, but we get mighty cross when white and mainstream America laughs and mocks us. With a name like Quieshianiquita (I know, I can’t pronounce it either), you’re dooming your children to employment at no better than a dollar store or the nearest fast-food joint.
You are automatically relegated in the minds of many to second-class citizenry, because when they hear the name, they instantly categorize you as ignorant, ghetto, incompetent, uneducated, and not worthy of much respect or basic human considerations.
We hear so often about African American students who excel in school, etc. and “beat the odds.” Well, guess what? Often times, the “odds they have to beat” is the tough challenge of being taken seriously in America with the atrocious name you gave them...names like Jaqui’sheia Sha’qu’an Tai’isha. If they can get someone to look past the name (and quit laughing), there is remarkable talent there in that person.
Unfortunately though, much of mainstream America isn’t willing to find this out. Come in with the wrong name, and you are nothing more than fodder for stereotypical, distasteful jokes. We as African Americans face enough challenges as it is. Our kids deserve a better start and a way better shot than this.
You’re angry with me? I can live with that. Now answer this: when have you ever seen an IBM Executive or a fancy New York office with a fancy highrise office door nameplate that says “Quandaniquah Roshel-Shaquita, Chief Executive Officer”? When? You don’t, and you never have, because the reality is, corporate America and a huge chuck of mainstream doesn’t have a high regard for those names. Quite frankly, you won’t be taken seriously.
I’ve been behind many a closed door with white corporate America. Oddly enough, many of them still see the Negro in the room as ‘non-existent’ or invisible, so they talked like I wasn’t even in the room. I hear everything they say. When Nakia Shaniquah-Quashiqua fills out an application, they have a field day in the office. Once they get their fill of ghetto and ‘weave’ jokes and ripping you to pieces sight unseen, they usually toss the application, or it gets stuck in the ‘bottom of the pile’. If they do hire you, you’re relegated to some meaningless, inconsequential task behind the scenes so they won’t be embarrased by you.
I’ve learned the harsh truth that right or wrong, no quality mainstream company wants someone named (oh just pick a name) representing them in the forefront. We don’t hear that, though. We just want you to get the name right, and look at you funny if you don’t. I recall a time a young woman got really cross with me because her name was LaShi’quita and I forgot to capitalize the ‘S’ and left the little accent mark off the first ‘i’ - how was I supposed to know? But lawd ha’mercy...what did I do THAT for? She was mad, hostile, and ready to FIGHT! It was a BIG ridiculously overblown embarassing ordeal (for her), and that’s OUR fault, parents.
She wouldn’t have such a huge chip on her shoulder and be so defensive, confrontational and mean if we had just given her a name that the average person can pronounce or spell. No spell check in the world can help, so most of her existence is spent correcting the spelling of her name, and feeling disrespected because people can’t get it right. We set her up for this constant and unnecessary battle.
I do not advocate naming all our children Bobby and Susie. But let’s do our babies a favor and keep the syllables down to a minimum, leave out the suffixes “quita”, “sheika”,“eisha”, “niqua”, “quan”...anysuffix with the letter ‘Q’. I could go on, but you get where I'm headed.And if you want your child to have an authentic African or other ethnic name, do a little research. Don’t just make up a name and expect the world to be able to spell and pronounce it. You're not being original or cute. That child has to LIVE with that horrible name, and that's not funny...or cute.
Amen. Now pass the cornbread.
Nope, that side of the family was from Oklahoma Indian territory. Choctaw.
I married out of the spelling test. It's a relief.
Hello, Sue.
How are yew?
Bump
LOL...at least I did get to move up the alphabet a great distance.
agreed. Patrisha bothers me alot.
But Dianna is "Malcom J". How do you suppose they figure that?
Wow. I'm surprised that was done. One of the first things they tell us in 'teaching for diversity' is that you don't single out people due to race, disability, whatever. jeez.
I turned down a doctoral fellowship at a school that wanted me to attend a summer program for new minority grad students. I hold a JD and 2 masters. I don't need anyone to teach me about the wonders of grad school, but because they saw the race on the application, they immediately thought I needed some kind of remediation.
I actually told the admissions committee why I was turning them down. I felt that if I went to this session, then classmates and faculty would always suspect my work - maybe I wasn't that great if I needed a summer course. I would have been handicapped before I began. Even if I did not attend the session, I didn't want to go to a place that ignored my accomplishments and saw me as a race.
As a teacher in an urban middle school, my brother had his fair share of oddly named children. One was, I swear, "Crystal Shanda Lear".
The things parents do to their kids.
No, there were NOT. Ura does not exist, nor did she ever.
"NAME".
Back in the day when CNN had an afternoon chatroom. I used the screen name of NAMe meaning "enemy".
After my first post, I was kicked out of the chatroom. I told everyone that CNN stood for Clinton News Network. In about 5 seconds a little box appeared on my screen telling me to be nice and then I booted.
He exclaimed, "Here comes the placenta!"
If it was a mixed Jewish/Japanese family, it could have been "Gentile Gaijin." That would have covered all the bases.
I had a grandfather that all the grandkids called Podgie. I didn't find out till I was grown that his real name was Harold.
My black friend (yes, I'm a YT claiming I have black friends) is planning on naming his baby girl Keibreeanna (Key-Bree-Anna). I suggested they name her La Cienega Boulevarda instead for more ghetto-fab glam.
"I had a student named Latrina. I am not kidding. "
I recall a young black girl named Placenta!
I can just about top that with my great-grandmother, Albertina Alaska.
Clever screen name (NAMe)... I like it!
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