FReeper Canteen~What Makes You Laugh?~July 28, 2005~

July 27, 2005 | bentfeather

[Soaring Feather]

For the freedom you enjoyed yesterday...
Thank the Veterans who served in The United States Armed Forces.

Looking forward to tomorrow's freedom?
Support The United States Armed Forces Today!

Good morning TROOPS!!
What makes you laugh??
Post your funny cartoons, jokes, anything you enjoy!

This one always cracks me up!

You Might Be A Soldier If..

Silly cartoon characters??

What tickles your funny bone??
A good joke, funny cartoons, a practical joker?

Computer humor?

"Why We Love Kids"

I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"

2. HONESTY

My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago."

3. OPINIONS

On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

4. KETCHUP

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang, so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "It's the minister, Mommy," the child said. Then she added, "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

5. MORE NUDITY

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

6. POLICE # 1

While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?" "Yes," I answered and continued writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed help, I should ask the police. Is that right?" "Yes, that's right," I told her. "Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you please tie my shoe?"

7. POLICE # 2

It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"

8. ELDERLY

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"

9. DRESS-UP

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."

10. DEATH

While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaaaaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he gooooes."

11. SCHOOL

A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk."

12. BIBLE

A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear."

bentfeather

[EsmeraldaA]

Hugs back Ma! {{{MA}}}

My day was more or less ok. Never enough time though

[SevenofNine]

that so true Kathy rack it hey anybody who used live in still live in SO Cal know that county LOL!!!

[Kathy in Alaska]

God bless you good for sharing your books with our soldiers.

[Army Air Corps]

This remains one of my dream cars - The Lotus Esprit Turbo.



Until the 1990s, they had a turbocharged slant 4 that would shoot you over 170mph.

[MS.BEHAVIN]

Don't know if you have seen our Harley before..

thought you might enjoy the pic..

This is a 1947 beauty

Mr.B has been riding this motorcycle for almost 40 years..

[luvie]

Sheesh! I'm sure glad that plan didn't go through. How scary! That airport is right in the middle of a busy part of the city!

[Army Air Corps]

Hey, you could always win the lottery!

Have you tried to look for parts on E-Bay? You can buy New Old Stock at reasonable prices.

[Army Air Corps]

Hola!

[MS.BEHAVIN]

(Whistling)
Man!
That's SOME car!
Ms.B

[luvie]

Man, that is a beautiful car. Lotus had some hot cars all right! A dream is all that it would remain for me--way outta my price range!

[EsmeraldaA]

LOL! Yes, she's gaining weight. she has dark hair, but looks like the new hair is lighter. Her eyes are gray with a little green. I think they will be hazel with time.

[Army Air Corps]

Great jumpin' Jehosephat! That is cherry!

[EsmeraldaA]

Hola! Como estas? Long time :)

[MS.BEHAVIN]

1. You have too many shoes.

LOL!!
Mr B calls me the Imelda Marcos of Maine!
I LOVE shoes!
Ms.B

[luvie]

She's gonna be a beauty--in fact I'll bet everyone says she already is!

[Army Air Corps]

Shop some of the 1980s models; you can find some good deals on them. The new ones are more powerful because they pack a 350bhp V-8 that will take you from 0 to 60mph in under five seconds (manual transmission).

[SevenofNine]

Yeah don't forget that airport is very old if bomb goes off that airport would probably collapse terminal pick up passagnger it could stand up earthquake explosioin the dude was using NO WAY

Well breaking news off Xinurea news wire report those Chinese farmer are at again they are attack Chinese cop in that Chinese farming region

And another breaking news off Xinurea news wire report ANOTHER OIL Explosion has kill 3 Indian oil workers they blame sloppy handiwork

[luvie]

There's no such thing as too many shoes.....girl rule #5!!! We're not even gonna go there--I am fast running outta closet space! Hubby just sort of shakes his head when I find another pair I just can't live without! LOL!

[Army Air Corps]

Estoy bien. Como estas?

Man! I just looked at the time; I gotta catch some Zs.

[Army Air Corps]

The added bonus is that a Lotus has rear-wheel drive!