Since I haven't contributed

What's the matter Little Timmy?

Didn't mommy give you enough attention this morning?

Did she take you off the tit at too early an age?

By the way.... Who the hell do you think cares if you stay or go? Adios!

You're a fine one to talk, Mr. "Consenting Moose".

What a shocking accusation. Let me guess, you think that "Zebra Fetish" was mine as well.

;-)

You're not Buzz Aldrin, are you?

Parting is such sweet sorrow. Alas, it just wasn't that great of an opus.

Haven't you come to the realization that this is really just a fund raiser. Promise to contribute ten bucks and I'll go away as soon as jim gets your money.

.s'tel ,seY

"I heard an ugly story about him. It involved a moose."

That Janet Reno character does git around, don't she?!

FReegards...MUD

This sounds like "STAND BACK OR THE IDIOT GETS IT!!!"

I'm not kidding this time.
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I REALLY, REALLY MEAN IT.
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SERIESLY, DON"T TRY AND STOP ME!!!.
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OKAY!!! HERE IT GOES!!!.
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HELLOOOOOO! ANYONE THERE!?!

(sound of crickets)

Oughta be "Redleg Idio.." Oh never mind.

Thanks, my FRiend...my day wouldn't have been complete without knowledge of this thread...MUD

Let me guess, you think that "Zebra Fetish" was mine as well. ;-)

I never trust the man who leaps up and says "I didn't do it!!" before anyone accuses him...

this is really just a fund raiser

But...but... you titled this thread "Since I haven't contributed". Is this one of those logical fallacies that are supposed to make computers blow up, like when Kirk told the computer that Spock is a vulcan and can never lie, and then Spock told the computer "I'm lying"?

Matthew 22:21

Has absolutley nothing to do with fr, jim, or the republican party.

So tell me, how many pollocks does it take...

I've heard a lot of stories about classygreeneyedblonde, but not one of them had anything to do with fish.

Okay, you can't leave until you clear this one up.

....well, that about sums it up!

Poor Timmy is probably sobbing his little eyes dry after that out-pouring of love! haha

So tell me, how many pollocks does it take...

You came back from an opus to post that?

Of course there are "contributors" such as yourself that post nonsense

And to think, you are number 164, says alot for the intellect of the average freeper and what does it say for the real super intellects like you?

Alrighty then, if you won't respect Robert's Rules of Opus, then its time for something completely different:

Monty Python's The Meaning of Life
Part VII: Death

[dong]
ANNOUNCER:
The Meaning of Life: Part Seven: Death.

[seagulls]
[ocean sounds]

[suspenseful music]
NARRATOR #2:
This man is about to die. In a few moments, now, he will be killed, for Arthur Jarrett is a convicted criminal who has been allowed to choose the manner of his own execution.
NAKED GIRL #1:
There.
NAKED GIRL #2:
There he is!
NAKED GIRLS:
[panting]
[exciting music]

GOVERNOR:
Arthur Charles Herbert Runcie MacAdam Jarrett,...

...you have been convicted by twelve good persons and true... of the crime of first degree making of gratuitous, sexist jokes in a moving picture.

[heavenly music]

NAKED GIRLS:
[panting]
ARTHUR JARRETT:
Aaaaaaaggh!

[whump]
PADRE:
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.

LEAF #1:
[sobbing]
[bark bark bark]
[bark bark bark bark]
[bark bark]
It's no good. I-- I-- I-- I just can't go on. I-- [sob] I'm no good any more. [sniff]
LEAF #2:
No.
LEAF #1:
[sob] I-- I-- I want to end it all. [sobbing] Good-bye! Good-bye!
[snap]
Aaaaaaagggghh!

[whump]
LEAF #2:
[gasp] Oh, my God! [gasp] Oh, no! I c-- [gasp] What'll I do? I-- I can't live without him. I-- I-- I-- [gasp]
[snap]
Aaaaaaggh!
[whump]
LEAF #3:
Mummy?
LEAF #4:
Mum, where are you?
LEAF #3:
Mum? Daddy?
LEAF #4:
[gasp]
LEAF #3:
Mumm-- mummy?
LEAF #4:
[gasp] Mummy? What are you doing?
LEAF #3:
[gasp gasp]
LEAF #4:
Don't push.
[snap]
LEAF #3:
[gasp] Aaaaaaggghh!
LEAF #4:
Aaaaaaggghh! Aaaaggghh!
[whump]
[whump]
REMAINING LEAVES:
Oh! Aagh!
[whump]
[breathing sound]
[bark bark bark bark bark bark]
[bark bark bark]

[bark bark bark bark]
[bark bark bark]

[dong]
[dong]
[wind]
[dong]
[dong]

[dong]
[scary music]

[clunk clunk]
[clunk clunk]
GEOFFREY:
Yes?
[pause]
Is it about the hedge?

[pause]
Look. I am awfully sorry, but--
GRIM REAPER:
I am the Grim Reaper.
GEOFFREY:
Who?
GRIM REAPER:
The Grim Reaper.
GEOFFREY:
Yes, I see.
GRIM REAPER:
I am death.
GEOFFREY:
Yes, well, the thing is, we've got some people from America for dinner tonight, and--
ANGELA:
Who is it, darling?
GEOFFREY:
It's a 'Mr. Death' or something. He's come about the reaping? I don't think we need any at the moment.
ANGELA:
Hello. Well, don't leave him hanging around outside, darling. Ask him in.
GEOFFREY:
Darling, I don't think it's quite the moment.
ANGELA:
Do come in. Come along in. Come and have a drink. Do. Come on.

GUESTS:
[mumbling]
ANGELA:
It's one of the little men from the village.
GUESTS:
[mumbling]
ANGELA:
Uh, do come in.
GUESTS:
[mumbling]
ANGELA:
Please.
GUESTS:
[mumbling]
ANGELA:
This is Howard Katzenberg from Philadelphia...
HOWARD KATZENBERG:
Hi.
ANGELA:
...and his wife, Debbie,...
DEBBIE:
Hello there.
ANGELA:
...and these are the Portland-Smythes, Jeremy and Fiona.
FIONA PORTLAND-SMYTHE:
Good evening.
ANGELA:
This is Mr. Death.
[spooky music]

Well, do get Mr. Death a drink, darling.
GEOFFREY:
Uh, yes.
HOWARD:
Mmm.
ANGELA:
Mr. Death is a reaper.
GRIM REAPER:
The Grim Reaper.
ANGELA:
Hardly surprising, in this weather. Ha ha ha.
EVERYONE:
[laughing]
HOWARD:
So, you still, uh, reap around here, do you, Mr. Death?
GRIM REAPER:
I am the Grim Reaper.
GEOFFREY:
That's about all he says.
DEBBIE:
Heh.
GEOFFREY:
There's your drink, Mr. Death.
ANGELA:
Do sit down.
DEBBIE:
We were just talking about some of the awful problems facing the thir-- [gasp]
[crash]
ANGELA:
Ohh. Would you prefer white? I-- I'm afraid we don't have any beer.
JEREMY PORTLAND-SMYTHE:
The Stilton's awfully good.
GRIM REAPER:
I am not of this world.
[spooky music]
GEOFFREY:
Good Lord.
GRIM REAPER:
I am death.

DEBBIE:
Well, isn't that extraordinary? We were just talking about death only five minutes ago.
ANGELA:
Yes, we were.
HOWARD:
Mmm. Mm.
ANGELA:
You know, whether death is really the end.
DEBBIE:
As my husband, uh, Howard, here, feels, or whether there is-- and one so hates to use words like 'soul' or 'spirit', but--
JEREMY:
But what other words can one use?
GEOFFREY:
E-- exactly.
GRIM REAPER:
You do not understand.
DEBBIE:
Ah, no. Obviously not.
HOWARD:
Let me just tell you something, Mr. Death.
GRIM REAPER:
You do n--
HOWARD:
Just one moment. I'd like to express, on behalf of everybody here, what a... really unique experience this is.
JEREMY:
Hear, hear.
ANGELA:
Yes, we're so delighted, uh, that you dropped in, Mr. Death.
HOWARD:
Can I just finish, please?
DEBBIE:
Mr. Death, is there an after-life?
HOWARD:
Dear, if you could just wait, please, a moment,--
ANGELA:
Are you sure you wouldn't like some sherry?
DEBBIE:
[mumbling]
HOWARD:
Angela. Angela, I'd like to just say this at this time, if I could, please. Really.
GRIM REAPER:
Be quiet!
HOWARD:
Can I just say this at this time, please?
GRIM REAPER:
Silence! I have come for you.
ANGELA:
You mean... to--
GRIM REAPER:
Take you away. That is my purpose. I am death.
GEOFFREY:
Well, that's cast rather a gloom over the evening, hasn't it?
HOWARD:
I don't see it that way, Geoff. [sniff] Let me tell you what I think we're dealing with here: a potentially positive learning experience to get an--
GRIM REAPER:
Shut up! Shut up, you American.

You always talk, you Americans. You talk and you talk and say 'let me tell you something' and 'I just wanna say this'. Well, you're dead now, so shut up!
HOWARD:
Dead?
GRIM REAPER:
Dead.
ANGELA:
All of us?
GRIM REAPER:
All of you.
GEOFFREY:
Now, look here. You barge in here, quite uninvited, break glasses, and then announce, quite casually, that we're all dead. Well, I would remind you that you are a guest in this house, and--
[whock]
Ah! Oh.
GRIM REAPER:
Be quiet! Englishmen, you're all so fucking pompous, and none of you have got any balls.
DEBBIE:
Can I ask you a question?
GRIM REAPER:
What?
DEBBIE:
How can we all have died at the same time?

[silence]
GRIM REAPER:
The salmon mousse.
GEOFFREY:
Darling, you didn't use canned salmon, did you?
ANGELA:
I'm most dreadfully embarrassed.
GRIM REAPER:
Now the time has come. Follow. Follow me.
[clunk]
[bang bang bang bang bang]
GEOFFREY:
Just... testing. Sorry.
GRIM REAPER:
Follow me. Now.
[deathly music]
Come.
[eerie music]
ANGELA:
Well, the fishmonger promised me he'd have some fresh salmon, and he's normally so reliable.
RANDOM:
Stumm. Stumm.
JEREMY:
Can we keep our glasses?
RANDOM:
Mmm hmm.
FIONA:
Oh. Good idea. [hiccup]
RANDOM:
Come on.
GUESTS:
[mumbling]
HOWARD:
Okay.
GUESTS:
[mumbling]
DEBBIE:
Hey, I didn't even eat the mousse.

GUESTS:
[mumbling]
ANGELA:
Honestly, darling, I'm so embarrassed. It really is embarrassing. I mean,...
HOWARD:
I suppose... [mumbling]
ANGELA:
...to serve salmon with botulism at a dinner party is social death for me.
GEOFFREY:
Well, all right.
GUESTS:
[mumbling]
JEREMY:
Uh, shall we take our cars?
FIONA:
Do we need them?
GEOFFREY:
Why not?
ANGELA:
Yes. Why not?
HOWARD:
[mumbling] ...is my vote.
ANGELA:
Good idea.
RANDOM:
Yes. Why not?
GUESTS:
[mumbling]
RANDOM:
Shall we go separately?
[car sounds]

GUESTS:
[mumbling]
[spooky music]

GRIM REAPER:
Behold... Paradise.
[elevator music]
MR. HENDY:
I love it here, darling.
MRS. HENDY:
Me too, Marvin.
RECEPTIONIST:
Hello. Welcome to Heaven.

Excuse me, could you just sign here, please, sir?
JEREMY:
Yes.
RECEPTIONIST:
Thank you! There's a table for you through there in the restaurant.
JEREMY:
Thank you.
RECEPTIONIST:
For the ladies,...
FIONA:
Mhm. 'After-life Mints'. [hiccup]
DEBBIE:
Thank you.
RECEPTIONIST:
Happy Christmas!
DEBBIE:
Oh, is it Christmas today?
RECEPTIONIST:
Of course, madam. It's Christmas every day in Heaven.
DEBBIE:
Ohh.
HOWARD:
Mmm.
DEBBIE:
How about that?
HOWARD:
Hello there.
DEBBIE:
Ah.

CROWD:
[mumbling]

[music]
Shhh. Shhhh! Shhh...
TONY BENNETT:
Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. It's truly a real honourable experience to be here this evening, a very wonderful and warm and emotional moment for all of us, and I'd like to sing a song for all... of you.
[applause]

[singing]

It's Christmas in Heaven.
All the children sing.
It's Christmas in Heaven.
Hark. Hark. Those church bells ring.

It's Christmas in Heaven.
The snow falls from the sky,

But it's nice and warm, and everyone
Looks smart and wears a tie.

It's Christmas in Heaven.
There's great films on TV:
'The Sound of Music' twice an hour
And 'Jaws' One, Two, and Three.

JOSEPH AND MARY: [singing]
There's gifts for all the family.
There's toiletries and trains.
THREE WISE MEN: [singing]
There's Sony Walkman Headphone sets
And the latest video games.

EVERYONE: [singing]
It's Christmas! It's Christmas in Heaven!
Hip hip hip hip hip hooray!
Every single day
Is Christmas day!

It's Christmas! It's Christmas in Heaven!
Hip hip hip hip hip hooray!

Every single day
Is Chri--

Howlin.......it's a SILLY SILLY SILLY song, too!

"Wheres the d@mnn kool-aid when you need it."

In this case we need the Jim Jones Kool-aid (for Timmy that is)!

there IS a difference in the value of the life of a stockbroker as opposed to a dish washer at Windows on the World. It was shocking.

How in God's name could that possibly be shocking?

It's not simply that decades of Legal Lotto has drummed into everyone's head the relative worth of each person's pain and suffering. Our own government -- the President, even -- is perfectly capable of drawing distinctions between the relative worth of human lives ... some of which are the Almighty's answer to the prayers of infertile couples (homosexuals, single women, men, groups of adults ... whoever's got sufficient cash) and some of which are mulch for human research, depending on whether they are Implanted or simply "Excess" human runoff.

Did you also somehow miss the fact that the government's decided that some unborn human lives can be murdered with no penalty (as long as their not useful or "unwanted") while other unborn lives can be used to reap personal injury damages from anyone who causes miscarriage or death to a pregnant woman?

The claims of the victims are only logical ... using the government's logic of victimology.

Besides ... I fail to see how you -- a proponent of the nanny state such that you believe taxpayers should pick up the bill for illness and surgery to save lives and ensure health for all -- can find fault with the Government's being held responsible for making an estate whole when a life is lost due to government negligence in the one area -- defense of the citizenry from foreign threat -- that's actually a constitutional responsibility where the wellbeing of the citizenry is concerned.