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Jury unable to decide if strangling your kids is ok.
The Babylon Bee ^ | 8/31/2026 | Staff

Posted on 09/04/2026 1:15:06 PM PDT by Phoenix8

PLYMOUTH, MA — After several days of deliberation, a jury was unable to ultimately decide whether murder is wrong.

The deep nuances of the case delayed the decision, with jurors facing intricate legal and moral questions such as whether it's fine to methodically strangle your own kids one by one.

"Oof. That was a toughie," said Juror number seven, reviewing the facts of the case. "There was so much to consider, like if luring children down into a basement to murder them is bad. We were really at a loss."

According to anonymous sources, the jury had concluded that squeezing the life out of a puppy while it desperately struggled to breathe was bad, but they were not yet sure if that applied to humans. "We are pretty confident that choking puppies to death is wrong," said an anonymous juror. "If they are your own children, and you're not feeling good, maybe it's okay. We just couldn't decide."

At publishing time, the jury had decided that it was best for America to do this all again in a few months.


TOPICS: Humor; Society
KEYWORDS: abortion; clancy; cultofdeath; deathcult; massmurderingmoms; moloch; postbirthabortion
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To: Jamestown1630

You are correct. Reddington confirmed in a press conference Friday that the majority of jurors were voting to acquit Clancy, with one man holding out. I feel like an idiot for thinking it was the lone man wanting to acquit. I also feel shocked that the rest wanted to acquit. What has abortion taken us to?


41 posted on 09/04/2026 2:49:09 PM PDT by jonrick46 (The DemonKKKrat Marxists ride Unicorns on their fantasy farms.)
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To: Jamestown1630

I would just say if your going by what that defense attorney is saying I’d suggest you get your info elsewhere.

He is probably the last person that you’ll hear objective information from in this case.


42 posted on 09/04/2026 2:49:18 PM PDT by V_TWIN (America....so great even the people that hate it won't leave!)
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To: caddie
The horror those children experienced.

For a moment, but the murderer and 11 jurors will be judged by the Righteous Judge.

Rev 21:4
And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
43 posted on 09/04/2026 2:49:54 PM PDT by af_vet_1981 ( The bus came by and I got on, That's when it all began.)
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To: jonrick46

I don’t think ‘acquittal’ as people seem to mean it was in the cards. Even not guilty by reason of her state of mind would probably keep her locked up for a long time.


44 posted on 09/04/2026 2:50:29 PM PDT by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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To: V_TWIN

I’m going by what the attorney AND the judge said.


45 posted on 09/04/2026 2:51:03 PM PDT by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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To: MortMan

Absurdity to demonstrate absurdity.


46 posted on 09/04/2026 2:51:56 PM PDT by Texas resident ( We finally have an American President again)
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To: Jamestown1630

I see it as the one juror followed the judge’s instructions to the letter. His belief wasn’t popular so they bullied him and he stood his ground.

Even the judge, after he questioned each juror separately, said the guy had no problem with the instructions. He just had a different belief re guilty vs not guilty. Jurors are allowed to do that; that’s why we have the system we have.


47 posted on 09/04/2026 2:57:43 PM PDT by MayflowerMadam (In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.)
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To: cpdiii

“That was the opinion of the Foreman of the jury if this is to be believed. The contents of the note are not public.”

EXACTLY! The foreman created the note and most likely threw the one holdout under the bus using disparaging verbiage and narrative.


48 posted on 09/04/2026 3:00:23 PM PDT by MayflowerMadam (In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.)
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To: MayflowerMadam

Makes a person avoid MA, if you love life.


49 posted on 09/04/2026 3:00:29 PM PDT by combat_boots
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To: combat_boots

The discrepancy between how men and women under psychiatric episodes are treated is crazy. They sentence the men to death in minutes.


50 posted on 09/04/2026 3:02:40 PM PDT by TTFX
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To: MayflowerMadam

What I’ve just heard on FOX is that the one DID express doubt, but still refused to follow the instruction.

Unless members of the jury speak up, I guess we’ll never know. They have no obligation to explain themselves to the public.


51 posted on 09/04/2026 3:05:38 PM PDT by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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To: cpdiii

Zackly.


52 posted on 09/04/2026 3:06:00 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: Jamestown1630

Our family had an ex-husband who scrawled “You are a whore,” on the wall of her place of employment. He also shot out the window in her living room. Finally, he caught his ex-wife’s lawyer on the sidewalk and almost cut off his head with a boning knife. The murder made big headlines on TV and newspapers. He got off from a Capital murder conviction with a mental illness defense. Letters to the editor of my newspaper were filled with outrage at the acquittal. It seems that if your crazy enough, you get three meals and a room at a mental hospital.


53 posted on 09/04/2026 3:07:06 PM PDT by jonrick46 (The DemonKKKrat Marxists ride Unicorns on their fantasy farms.)
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To: Jamestown1630

“What I’ve just heard on FOX is that the one DID express doubt, but still refused to follow the instruction.”

Fox reported that. The judge himself said the opposite.


54 posted on 09/04/2026 3:08:03 PM PDT by MayflowerMadam (In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.)
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To: TTFX

some things were in her control before she took any pill that day.

I know some about addictiveness, and emotional outbursts/feeling out of control but we all have choices even if under influence.

Also Holy Spirit gives self control to any who ask. I know from things in life, some thing about that too.

if people got certain vitamin levels and various chemical levels in body checked and balanced out, instead of offered psych or depression meds, that would be healthier. most post-partum depression or similar mind issues/chemical imbalances can be easily addressed if PEOPLE would bother to learn instead of trusting doctors without full information about what they may be taking.

IF they choose to take it (informed or not), the consequences are on them for trusting man and themself and taking it.

Rx anxiety/depression meds are like some one choosing to drink or use rec drugs to handle stress. All choices with side effects. Just some are publicly more acceptable than others but all mind altering, and all choices, actions to be made.

She chose the psych meds. I think I read she was on multiple ones. People knew she was not ok, yet they let her be near the kids.

plenty of options before, whoops, I think I need a lawyer.

Yes God will forgive, if asked, but still consequences for her actions, murders.


55 posted on 09/04/2026 3:08:56 PM PDT by b4me (Pray, and let God change you. He knows better than you or anyone else, who He made you to be.)
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To: jonrick46

It has to be a possible defense in our system, because whatever you may think about individual cases, sometimes people really ARE crazy and not fully responsible for their acts.


56 posted on 09/04/2026 3:09:52 PM PDT by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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To: b4me

She chose the psych meds.

- - - - - - -

I agree with you that if she chose to take them, she should still be separated from society.


57 posted on 09/04/2026 3:13:40 PM PDT by TTFX
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To: MayflowerMadam

Well, if that was true, how could there be anything but a mistrial? A unanimous verdict was required.


58 posted on 09/04/2026 3:15:22 PM PDT by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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To: Jamestown1630

Of course. Mistrial was the ONLY option. And Lindsay’s attorney wanted to throw out the person who was the thorn in the flesh and have acquittal with 11 people who agreed with him. What kind of precedent would that set for the future in America?


59 posted on 09/04/2026 3:19:57 PM PDT by MayflowerMadam (In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.)
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To: Jamestown1630

The Bee is right on the money. There is no possible excuse for this. And, yes, the question of whether it is ok to strangle your kids is the question before the jury. Don’t try to minimize what she did. She murdered her children. She needs the maximum sentence. End of story.


60 posted on 09/04/2026 3:20:06 PM PDT by P-Marlowe
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