Posted on 07/30/2026 9:45:43 AM PDT by dayglored
You may have recently realized that prominent figures can easily slide off the hook by pleading the Fifth Amendment, but did you know it's possible to plead the Fifth at home as well? Husbands, stop incriminating yourselves by simply pleading the Fifth when faced when any of these eight questions:
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Eventually the man's wife died, and then the man soon married again.
Johnson's comment was that it was the triumph of hope over experience.
1) Ladies: Learn to ask honest questions.
2) Ladies: Learn to accept the answers you get. You asked. If you didn't want an answer, you have no excuse for asking.
3) Gentlemen: Give honest answers from "Day One" of the relationship. You don't have to tolerate emotional abuse. If honest answers set her off, ditch the bitch.
4) Gentlemen: Honesty doesn't mean cruelty. "It's very unflattering" conveys the same message as "It makes you look like Jabba-the-Hutt" ... but one of those is a better answer than the other.
From Benny Hill:
Old couple in bed:
Wife: “Were you ever unfaithful to me?”
Husband: “Once. Just once.”
Wife: “You sure could use that once now.”
“Don’t ask me what I think of you, I might not give you the answer that you want me to.”
LOL
How long have you had that pistol?
Why do we drive on the parkway and park in the driveway?
Old saying: A woman is a human lie detector system.
It is said they developed sensitivity to cues during evolution when males fought physically against attackers and to get food while females had to work with their available mental talents such as not trusting someone while the male was being conned.
A. E. van Vogt said males are simple creatures who desire sex and want to conquer opponents to gain ground. Females are much more complex.
Heh heh. The fat makes your dress look like an overstuffed sausage casing.
“Does my butt look fat in this Burka/Dress/other garment” Always plead the 5th.
Evrey husband should have those eight questions stowed away somewhere where hopefully the wife can’t find it...
Honey, I bought a you full length slim mirror. See? You fit right in the mirror.
14. How much did you pay for that gun?
My ex would ask my opinion then argue that I was wrong. The last five years of that marriage were hell.
When asked what I spent money on:
Me: Ask me no questions and I will tell you no lies. Don’t you know that *Christmas*Your Birthday*Valentine’s Day*Mother’s Day* is coming up?
Wife: It’s August!
Me: Dammit!
They are a very bad lie detector system. They seem to just about always marry Mr. Wrong. Ask Eve about lie detection.
But they will always say that “they just knew it!”
I told my wife and also my 3 daughters that if they asked an honest question, they would receive an honest answer.
I also told them that if they sincerely did not want to know, they should not ask.
While not preventing hurt feelings, those two statements have saved me from countless arguments. YMMV
The answer to that question is always “No” because it’s not the dress that makes her look fat. It’s the fat that makes her look “fat”
And deliver the answer very quickly. She will think it is an honest answer. No time to massage an answer.
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