What to tell a child on the first day of school

Me | 7/29/2026 | Me

[CtBigPat]

The idea of the commencement speaker always seemed silly to me. They wait till the last moments of your education to bring in someone to inspire you. I would think it would be better to bring in someone on the FIRST day of school to get your head straight and on the path to success. What would you tell a student on the first day of school?

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TOPICS: Education; Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: education

[KitJ]

BWAHAHAHAHAAH!

I love both of those movies!

Well done.

[Macoozie]

Best advice for school kids?

As Opa said, “always lead with your Left”.

[Fledermaus]

My Father told me not to believe everything they tell me.

I got sent to the principals office in 1969 5th grade when I argued Pluto wasn’t a planet.

[KitJ]

“Don’t pee your pants.Raise you hand.”
“When it’s nap time, take a nap. Don’t fight it.”
“Enjoy snack time and don’t be picky.”
“Don’t squeeze the juice box. Or the milk box.”
“When a girl picks on you, it means she likes you.”
“Don’t throw rocks on the playground.”
“Help others when they need it.”
“Those sprinkles on the school bus smell worse than the puke.”
“Be polite to the elders or they’ll call your parents.”
“Until you go to jail, there is no “Permanent Record” that the principal keeps.”

[Chickensoup]

You are staying home and mom and dad and the family are going to teach you. You will have fun and the family making will be wonderful and you will love it!

[Nateman]

Welcome Comrade! We here at the State Indoctrination Camp are going to get your mind right! What are you crying about? What we have here is a failure to communicate!

[cgbg]

Correct answer.

Subcontracting the education of your children to the government is child abuse.

“See that school bus driving by? It is for prisoners—not good kids like you.”

[KitJ]

I was SO waiting for this to appear! Thanks Adder.

When the movie came out we had already spent a good bit of time in Astoria.

We had two pet ferrets.

Can’t forget Arnold saying with his accent, “It’s a fear-it”.

(what were we talking about?) ;)

[NorthMountain]

The fact that she was a girl seemed irrelevant to me. At the time..

That's because it is. "Girls" have been demanding "equal rights" for decades. They should get equal rights. AND equal lefts.

[bigbob]

Keep your head on a swivel and your powder dry.

[enumerated]

That’s all good advice for the child.

Now let’s do one for the teachers.

Recognize that people learn in different ways - avoid one size fits all approaches.

Recognize that some are naturally competitive, others are not. Look for ways to inspire learning other than just “who can answer the fastest”.

Some of the brightest children tend to learn more slowly, or complete assignments more slowly than others, and sadly face disapproval for it in their early years. Don’t make that mistake.

A child who is quick with the correct answer may be missing deeper reflections and associations that will hinder him later. Be on the lookout for over-achievers.

Seek out and respect the parents’ wishes - don’t indoctrinate.

[KitJ]

"Schools and teachers are not responsible for you getting an education....YOU ARE!"

This is IT!

I was a latchkey Gen-X child with no father figures for a long time. My hardworking mum always made sure that I was reading. She made me discuss what I was reading. Explain, argue, debate. Gain knowledge, wisdom, experience, and understanding.

My children were raised similar. Supported them, encouraged them, debated them. Whenever I was around. They turned out pretty good.

Parents are the responsible persons when raising kids.

[GOP_Party_Animal]

Yes, absolutely. Not that there’s anything wrong with the OP, but all that stuff comes in as the years (quickly) go by.

[MikelTackNailer]

"You will learn to read then learn to think about it.

You will question authority. You will stand up for what you believe in.

You will get up when knocked down and knock down who knocked you down.

You will use fear as a motivator. You will do what has to be done.

You will smile and nod at idiot advice and then do things correctly.

You will lead by example and learn from those who do.

You will strive to benefit society and leave things better than you found them.

Avoid electing career criminals. That means no Democrats.

Dismissed."

[John Milner]

Well, that was 1961. The world was a completely different place then...

[Nateman]

R. L Ermey:

Do you realize I have not done a movie in five to six years? Why? Because I was totally blackballed by the... liberals in Hollywood," he alleged. "They can destroy you. They're hateful people [who] don't just not like you, they want to take away your livelihood... that's why I live up in the desert on a dirt road... I don't have to put up with their crap."

[Red Badger]

Being raised in a rural farming area, some of our ‘girls’ were big and muscular and could definitely kick some ass...................

[T.B. Yoits]

[T.B. Yoits]

[T.B. Yoits]