Do You Have Low Testosterone? Look For These Warning Signs

The Bee ^ | June 18, 2025 | The Bee

[dayglored]

Scientists have confirmed that testosterone levels are falling every generation, but how do you know if you have low T? Here are eleven warning signs to watch out for:

1. You experience emotions: Feelings are a classic symptom of low testosterone.

2. A Home Depot employee asked if you needed help finding something and you said "yes": You are unwell.

3. You used an oven mitt because the frying pan was "too hot": Aww, look at the little baby with his mitten!

4. You remembered one of your friend's birthdays: Please, seek help.

5. At the end of Braveheart you didn't shed a single tear: No testosterone, no humanity.

6. You've ever eaten a vegetable: Man up, for goodness' sake.

7. You have boobs: A telltale sign.

8. You're sitting on the back of a truck with your legs crossed filming an ad for Tim Walz: Uh-oh.

9. You call your mother-in-law "mom": Disgusting.

10. A doctor did blood work and showed you a chart where your testosterone level is way below normal: Subtle.

11. You're afraid to go on the teacups at Disneyland: And you call yourself a man.

If you've experienced any of these, please consult with a medical specialist today.

[dayglored]

Better check now before it's too late!!

[spel_grammer_an_punct_polise]

The people at the Bee are totally insane! LOL

[Buttons12]

You have more than one cat and less than one girl.

[tumblindice]

12. There are human ears nailed to the restaurant lobby walls, so you leave.
Chuck Norris, keeping it real.

[DesertRhino]

How would that feel? The people making the ad approach you and say “Hey, we’re making an ad about low-T, and we think you would be great for it. Can we take some photos of you?”

[Clay Moore]

Tampon Tim please pick up the white courtesy phone.

[Nervous Tick]

What’s a passing score here? Asking for a friend.

[dayglored]

> What’s a passing score here? Asking for a friend.

Seems to me like even a single "yeah, that's me" is enough to say your friend is in trouble.

Two matches? He's sunk, might as well consider transitioning.

[dayglored]

> You have more than one cat and less than one live girl.

FIFY

[dayglored]

> How would that feel? The people making the ad approach you and say “Hey, we’re making an ad about low-T, and we think you would be great for it. Can we take some photos of you?”

You hit it on the head. Even asking "how would that feel?" is enough to conclude "Yep, Low-T".

Because as in #1: "Feelings are a classic symptom of low testosterone."

[Nervous Tick]

Oh know! I use hot mi

...oops meant to say my friend uses hot mitts. I’ll break the bad news to they/them. 😩

[NonValueAdded]

I think welding gloves would be permitted.

[dayglored]

> I’ll break the bad news to they/them.

Be sure to take along a fresh box of "Extra-Soft" tissues. They'll have to have a "good cry".

[Nervous Tick]

Like this? 🤣😂

[dayglored]

> I think welding gloves would be permitted.

Any male that doesn't own at least one pair of welding gloves is already in deep trouble.

They also come in handy when clipping the cat's claws. (Don't ask me how I know that.)

[Labyrinthos]

“You have more than one cat and less than one girl.”

Only a male with excess testosterone would have more than one cat. Playing with two cats is a blood sport. I have the scratches and bite marks to prove it.

[A Navy Vet]

You call your mate...honey rather than BABE. It doesn’t count unless you use it in a low pitched voice.

[PoeToaster]

Nobody on this site had better be taking testosterone supplementation because that would be gender-affirming care. Suck it up, ladies.

[foundedonpurpose]

Had an outside cat adopt me. Brings in the bodies of things she kills and eats the heads. She didn’t manage to bring in the bodies from a coon fight, a momma and her young ones. I was sure she was dead, I heard the fight. Showed up for my coffee and a cigarette in the morning. Never saw the coons again. She’s pretty territorial and the most complete bad ass lady I’ve ever met. As for women, in done. I’ll keep the Grey tabby, she is faithful and true.

[dayglored]

> Nobody on this site had better be taking testosterone supplementation because that would be gender-affirming care.

The only "gender-affirming care" I want (or need) is the 80+ proof kind. That, Sir, is affirmation.

> Suck it up, ladies.

Indeed.