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Corporal Klinger Finally Discharged From Army After Trans Military Ban
The Bee ^ | May 6, 2025 | The Bee

Posted on 05/07/2025 9:04:03 AM PDT by dayglored

UIJEONGBU — Corporal Maxwell Klinger has finally been discharged from the Army after the U.S. Supreme Court upheld the Trump administration's ban on trans military members.

Klinger, stationed in Korea with the 4077th MASH unit, expressed relief that the day he had been looking forward to his whole life had finally arrived, and he could finally get out of the Army and get back home to Toledo, Ohio.

"Persistence really does pay off," Klinger said while wearing a frilly pink dress. "Everyone told me to give up years ago, but I knew if I stuck with it, I could get out of this place. On the bright side, I've managed to build up a really impressive wardrobe after all this time."

Other members of the 4077th said Klinger's consistency seemed to have an effect on the rest of the unit. "He's definitely not the only one here wearing dresses these days," said friend and colleague Corporal Walter "Radar" O'Reilly. "I don't know if it's other people being inspired or what, but there sure are a lot more fellahs dressing like ladies around here now. We all always thought he had a screw loose, but in hindsight, he turned out to be a real trendsetter. I'll be sad to see him go."

At publishing time, Klinger was reportedly hoping to follow in the footsteps of another prominent cross-dressing American serviceman and someday serve as the U.S. Assistant Secretary of Health.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor; Military/Veterans
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; klinger; mash; satire

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Free At Last!!
1 posted on 05/07/2025 9:04:03 AM PDT by dayglored
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To: dayglored

I always felt that Klinger needed some padding in the upper story.


2 posted on 05/07/2025 9:06:34 AM PDT by dayglored (This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalms 118:24)
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To: dayglored

Nice boomer joke. 😆


3 posted on 05/07/2025 9:15:06 AM PDT by TheDon (Remember the J6 political prisoners! Remember Ashli Babbitt!)
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To: dayglored

There bee missed on this one. The whole point is that Klinger wasn’t a fruitcake, he was faking it to try to force the army to get rid of him. Potter wasn’t buying his act.
Young kids just don’t get references to old shows.


4 posted on 05/07/2025 9:17:20 AM PDT by DesertRhino (2016 Star Wars, 2020 The Empire Strikes Back, 2025... RETURN OF THE JEDI...)
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To: DesertRhino

Ironically in the last MASH episode it turned out he was the last to leave Korea.


5 posted on 05/07/2025 9:18:13 AM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: DesertRhino

Klinger was malingering.


6 posted on 05/07/2025 9:24:29 AM PDT by ViLaLuz (2 Chronicles 7:14)
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To: dayglored
Klinger got the chance to have reassignment surgery in episode 7.16 Inga, where a visiting Swedish doctor talked with Klinger.
Klinger: I hope my attire doesn't shock you, Doctor.
Inga: No, not at all.
Klinger: The outward trapping of my unfortunate insanity.
To tell you the truth,I don't belong here. If two doctors will sign a form,I'll be able to go home. And so far,I've got all but both of them.
Inga: You know,I may be able to help you.
Klinger: Oh, you can?You mean it?
Inga: Yeah, well, I have a colleague in Copenhagen who does sex-change operations.
Klinger: Yeah? What's that?
Inga: Well, you would finally be transformed into a woman. It's very sophisticated surgery,but, uh, it's possible.
Klinger: You mean, somebody-- You mean, take a knife and--and--
Inga: -Yeah.
Klinger: -They're crazier than I am!
There is no way that last line could get on TV today.
7 posted on 05/07/2025 9:27:46 AM PDT by KarlInOhio (May Rachel Zegler and Disney never know profits.)
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To: DesertRhino

“”The whole point is that Klinger wasn’t a fruitcake””

WHY would you think it was necessary to clarify that? Those who watched MASH didn’t know that? If it was intended for the YOUNGER SET - do they even know what MASH is/was? Doubtful...

GOOD satire....


8 posted on 05/07/2025 9:41:01 AM PDT by Thank You Rush ( )
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To: dayglored

Not really “trans”!


9 posted on 05/07/2025 9:43:44 AM PDT by Honorary Serb (Kosovo is Serbia! Free Srpska! Abolish ICTY!)
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To: dayglored

Love it!!!


10 posted on 05/07/2025 9:47:17 AM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon." Amen. Come, Lord Jesu)
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To: DesertRhino

Yes. Nobody in the MASH was buying it.


11 posted on 05/07/2025 9:48:43 AM PDT by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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To: Honorary Serb
> Not really “trans”!

Klinger claimed to be a woman, and dressed like a woman. He didn't have hormones or surgery, but in fact most of the "trans" people today do not have surgery, and many do not take hormones.

All it requires, to be considered "trans", is to claim to be of the opposite gender.

Which is exactly what Klinger did. Granted, we all knew he was faking, but so are a lot of so-called "trans" people today, e.g. these guys in prison who get transferred to the women's prison, without surgery, and start having sex with the real women.

12 posted on 05/07/2025 9:50:29 AM PDT by dayglored (This is the day which the LORD hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalms 118:24)
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To: DesertRhino

Exactly right! The author must not understand that.


13 posted on 05/07/2025 10:15:06 AM PDT by ProtectOurFreedom (“Diversity is our Strength” just doesn’t carry the same message as “Death from Above”)
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To: dayglored

So Radar never got a promotion after all these years?


14 posted on 05/07/2025 10:15:30 AM PDT by scrabblehack
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To: dayglored

Klinger tried, again and again!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tQvZtBxzioA


15 posted on 05/07/2025 10:34:17 AM PDT by Beowulf9
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To: scrabblehack

Cpl. Walter “Radar” O’Reilly received a hardship discharge after his Uncle Ed passed away, and he had to go home to run the family farm.


16 posted on 05/07/2025 11:00:12 AM PDT by GreenLanternCorps (Hi! I'm the Dread Pirate Roberts! (TM) Ask about franchise opportunities in your area.)
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To: DesertRhino

Indeed. Klinger was putting on an act, and everybody knew it. And most of the time, he was attired in proper Army green fatigues.


17 posted on 05/07/2025 11:04:02 AM PDT by NorthMountain (... the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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To: Beowulf9; mabarker1

Coincidence...
I think Not.


18 posted on 05/07/2025 11:21:14 AM PDT by Big Red Badger (ALL Things Will be Revealed !)
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To: dfwgator

Yep… true


19 posted on 05/07/2025 11:21:54 AM PDT by DesertRhino (2016 Star Wars, 2020 The Empire Strikes Back, 2025... RETURN OF THE JEDI...)
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To: NorthMountain

Didn’t he finally marry a Korean girl?


20 posted on 05/07/2025 11:22:31 AM PDT by Jamestown1630 ("A Republic, if you can keep it.")
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