Posted on 04/28/2025 9:01:30 AM PDT by Red Badger
Carroll Shelby is gone – thank God. He is thus spared the indignity of knowing his name has been affixed to a device that’s neither a Shelby nor a Mustang. It is a device that pretends to be both. More finely, a device that trades on both those names in what is arguably the most embarrassing-ever attempt to do just that.
ELVIS impersonator VIDEO AT LINK.................
Let’s begin by talking about the device in question. It is not a bad device – as devices go. But it is as much a “Mustang” as an Elvis impersonator is Elvis. It’s worse, actually, because at least most Elvis impersonators try their best to look like Elvis and sing like he did, too.
The Ford Mach-E looks nothing like any Mustang ever made because no Mustang was ever made with four doors – and without an engine. The Mach-E is a five door crossover with electric motors. It does not sound like a Mustang, either – because it can’t. See that part about not having an engine.
MAT DAMON as Carroll Shelby Video at link...........
Enter the fakest and gayest part.
Hertz thought it’d trade on Carroll Shelby’s name by affixing it to 100 Mach-E devices painted black with gold accents, like the “rent a racer” GT350H Mustangs Hertz famously offered as rentals back in the mid-late 1960s, when Shelby – who was a very famous race car driver – was working closely with Ford on projects such as kicking Ferrari’s ass at the 24 Hours of LeMans road race. You may have seen the recent – and excellent – movie about it, starring Matt Damon as Shelby.
The real – not fake or gay – 19665-1966 Shelby GT350s that were in the Hertz rental fleet had hotted-up 289 V8s that made 306 advertised (probably more)horsepower and sounded something like this:
Loud Shelby GT350 Throws Down VIDEO AT LINK..............
The device that trades on Shelby’s name – and which isn’t a Mustang – let alone a Shelby Mustang – tries to sound like that. As in literally tries to sound like that. By playing a recording that sounds like that:
2023 Shelby GT-H Mach-E Start Up VIDEO AT LINK............
It breaks your heart, doesn’t it?
No doubt it would have broken Shelby’s – were he around to see (and hear) what Hertz has done. Because he was real and this is fake and very gay. It is also a kind of confession about the inadequacy of these devices. If batteries and motors are so hot – so superior – then why resort to playing the soundtrack of an engine that’s not there? It is akin to a stuffed lion “roaring” – and at least the stuffed lion was once actually a lion, before it got stuffed.
What is this thing? And why can’t it trade on its own merits – if it has them? The question answers itself.
It’s not just Hertz that’s making this confession, either. The mass-produced Mach-E (as opposed to this limited-run iteration) also plays the sounds of what it hasn’t got, piped into the passenger cabin via the audio system. Just not as over-the-top fake and gay as the sounds replayed inside the passenger of the “Shelby” GT-H device concocted by Hertz. But it amounts to the same embarrassing and depressing thing.
It makes one think of the fake plastic fruit used to dress up a dinner table at the furniture store – and even in that case, the plastic fruit is at least made to look like real fruit and no one is encouraged to taste it. Piping fake engine sounds into the passenger compartment of a vehicle specifically marketed as superior because it lacks an engine is bizarre, cognitively dissonant. Playing them – loudly – outside the device to show off what you haven’t got is just weird and sad. Like a woman strutting around ostentatiously wearing a gigantic codpiece.
The “Shelby” device is not the only such device, either.
Dodge – the people in charge of desecrating the brand, that is – thought they could replace the engine in the Charger with the “Fratzonic” sounds of one. The prototype of this device was ostentatiously “revved” when it was introduced to the automotive press.
FAKE CHARGER VIDEO AT LINK................
It hasn’t gone over well with people who like engines and the sounds they make. Probably for the same reason finding out your blind date’s a he rather than a she (assuming you are a he and not into him).
So it’s more than just a confessional – and embarrassing and sad. It is also arguably the greatest extant example of Marketing Fail ever. Know your market used to be the baseline tenet taught to people who wanted to sell things to people. In order to do that successfully, you don’t try taking away what the people you’re trying to sell to want – and try selling them something fake and gay instead. That being the very definition of fake and gay in that what you’re trying to see is inauthentic and it’s gay – Southpark usage – to push inauthentic stuff on people.
SOUTH PARK BIKER VUYS VIDEO AT LINK...............
That’s why it’s instinctive and natural to laugh at the GT-H “Mustang” and the device they’re calling a “Charger.”
Because they’re fake and gay.
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I was on the team(during Covid) that extended the Wheel base 9”.
I think it looks great.
I’m biased of course.😉
When Shelby died my friend had a PO for 50 of the Code Red Mustangs he designed and built. He built the first 2 in chatsworth at his shop, I was there and they were awesome. When he changed the boost to 20 pounds it put out 2500 HP. Frikking machine. I go by Toms shop on a regular basis, he makes some awesome stuff.
https://www.shelby.com/eblasts/082022-SAI/082022-SAI.html
Looks like a sort of souped up Tesla Model 3.
IMHO, Ford shouldn't have marketed it with the crossover shape. Nor should they have presented it like it saves mother 'erf from our carbon sins or whatever. They should have presented it like a second option of a Mustang sports car if you want the zippy acceleration of an EV (zippier than the gas version).
Pee Wee Herman dresses
Up as Batman.
.
That’s It.
Last I heard there was about an 18 month supply in dealers floorplans.
“ IMHO, Ford shouldn’t have marketed it with the crossover shape”
Families cannot afford an extra two door car for dad anymore, so they weren’t selling.
White collar people with disposable income buy Porsches or the equivalent.
Single men buy a pickups or skip the mustang stage and get the corvette.
I agree it’s a travesty, but the economy has crushed the former buyers of mustangs.
I saw a powder blue one in Omaha the other day. Didn’t catch Shelby on it but I was like, what the hey.
They should have called it the Escape Lightning, Galaxie, Falcon XE or something like that.
I don’t think GM is even dumb enough to make a 4-door/crossover/SUV thing and brand it as a Corvette.
As long as it’s a low-slung, sleek, fast 2-seater that looks good, they can put whatever drivetrain in it they want and people would still accept it as a Corvette.
Nice read and spot on. I just wish he’d used “retarded” as may times as “gay” in the article. I love being able to say both those words again. ;)
Huh.
Honesty would’ve named it a Fairmont, or a Granada.
You vill buy elektric cars undt you vill like them. Heil Darwin!
Don’t be so sure. They made the Northstar engine didn’t they? The Vega? Never underestimate GM’s ability to eff things up.
They need to add a fake exhaust smell too. I’ve always liked the smell of a slightly rich V8 loping at idle.
True, kind of what Obama said about Biden LOL.
I bought five GM vehicles from 1989-2010. The last one was in the shop more than any vehicle I ever had. The rear tailgate chrome strip came loose after about three weeks of ownership and it was downhill from there.
Maintained it religiously but still needed a new engine (thank God it was replaced under warranty) at 31,000 miles.
The computer module for the infotainment system failed about a month after the bumper-to-bumper warranty expired.
Started using quarts of oil every 1,000 miles or so around 89K so I got rid of it and will never buy from them again.
Not as bad as the Pinto engine powered mustangs of the mid 70’s.
It’s still seems very stupid to waste the mustang badge on it though.
they also made the small block v8, the 4.3 v6 version of it, and the 3800 6-cyl ... some of the finest engines ever made.
Think Ford is going after Subaru buyers. IYKYK
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