Posted on 11/25/2024 8:28:33 AM PST by dayglored
U.S. — In a dramatic move that could shake up the media industry, Elon Musk has announced his intent to purchase MSNBC and turn the channel into a news network.
Though initially dismissed as an outrageous prank, Musk has remained adamant that he is serious about hiring actual journalists and completely revamping the entire network in order to report real news.
"Admittedly I've been wrong about Musk before, but this is insane," said investor John Stanton. "This would be like buying Taco Bell and turning them all into high-end steakhouses. Doing actual journalism or reading actual news would be a complete paradigm shift."
Despite the naysayers, Musk has received support from several major players in the media industry. "He's already got Joe Rogan and Michael Knowles fighting over who gets to take Rachel Maddow's place," said former MSNBC executive Daniel Montgomery. "Obviously, Knowles has the look. No one is denying that, not even Knowles. What if they really fought over it, though? Rogan would put him out so fast... well, I take that back. Knowles seems kind of squirrely. Man, this is exciting."
At publishing time, Musk had graciously announced that Joe Scarborough could stay on staff as the barista for the company coffee bar.
About right.
Another poster said he should call it:
MXNBC
Scarborough a barista - LOL! I think he’s underqualified.
Just X News!
I’m old enough to remember when The Bee was a satire publication, not the straight news publication it is today.
So maybe Mika could do a "topless barista" thing. No, wait, on second thought, she's underqualified for that too.
XNN - the X News Network.
The only problem with that analogy is that Taco Bell is enormously successful, while high-end steakhouses are winking out like the stars at dawn. I suspect that Musk sees an opportunity to take a money-losing MSNBC and make a huge profit by turning it into the rarest thing on the planet: a news organization which actually reports the truth.
Musk’s timing is perfect with Trump taking the stage in the White House.
“Now pretend that you are monkey on air or it gets the hose!”
MSNPC
“So maybe Mika could do a “topless barista” thing. No, wait, on second thought, she’s underqualified for that too.
Nobody pays to watch ‘rocks in socks’ being saved about. To be fair, there are no geriatric male strippers either except for the dark corners of the internet.
Fic ‘Nres,’ better get their act togethet. Wr are SICK if infotainerd!
Mika has to work the pole now..
Fox ‘News’ better get their act together. We are sick of these infotainers.
They never saw “Demolition Man”!
Musk Sane News Broadcasting Company. There...
FN is totally unwatchable anymore. 1 minute of updates followed by 5 minutes of BORING cmmercials.
Is there some law against organizing a boycott of advertisers?
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.