Posted on 12/27/2023 2:57:47 AM PST by servo1969
SANTA MONICA, CA — A local man was tragically rendered unable to brush his teeth after he mistakenly neglected to pay the monthly subscription fee on his smart electric toothbrush.
"Toothbrush functionality disabled," the toothbrush had chirped loudly after a payment was declined. "Please update your method of payment to continue brushing your teeth."
"This is awful," said Jake Brown, owner of the toothbrush. "Things have just been so busy with the holidays and everything going on, I forgot to make this month's payment on my subscription for my OraDent Max, and now I haven't been able to brush my teeth for weeks! No one in my family wants to be anywhere near me. This is terrible!"
Brown had been the envy of many of his family members and friends earlier this year when he became one of the lucky first owners of the OraDent Max smart electric toothbrush, which features full Bluetooth capabilities, iPhone integration, the ability to sync with the user's contacts list and online music library, and more. "It's the future of toothbrushing," said OraDent spokesman Neil Prince. "No one is going to settle for an analog toothbrush anymore when they can have the world at their fingertips with a smart toothbrush. Cutting-edge oral hygiene will only cost you a $9.99 monthly subscription!"
By failing to keep his subscription paid up, Brown was left without the ability to maintain any level of oral hygiene. "I can't go back to using a regular toothbrush," he said. "What am I, some kind of caveman?"
At publishing time, Brown was reportedly hoping one of his friends would give him an OraDent Max gift card that would allow him to resume brushing his teeth.
Reminds me my smart condom payment is due.
Office 365.
Not fooled.
****Very**” impressed, though!
Trenchant, funny, an instant Bee classic.
Who should really want to rent or lease basic aspects of life? It’s abhorrent, wasteful.
He now has a lovely set of tooth.
BMW heated car seats:
https://www.wired.com/story/bmw-heated-seats-as-a-service-model-has-drivers-seeking-hacks/
poor guy
The Bee does it again...
Yep - I switched from Office to LibreOffice - started with Open Office but LibreOffice is a superior product.
I guess he owns nothing and is happy.
go to YouTube and type in " customer state's".
its an eye opener as to what you dont know is on the road next to you.
The “toothbrush” was invented in Alabama...
If it had been any other state, it would be called the “teethbrush”...
Brilliant.
but this could really be true ,there are tons of morons out there ,LOL
“I switched from Office to LibreOffice “
I still carry around my MS Office 2003 disc, and hold on to it like grim death. When we move, in my carry-in is my jewelry, important papers, Office 2003, and flash drive with my recipes.
I use both OpenOffice and LibreOffice, but have an old MS 2000 Excel disc. Never used it (nor know how).
Heh heh
As good as “Man Trapped On Escalator For 4 Hours”
I helped a neighbor put together an exercise machine. Needed subscription to use it.
That's one you don't want to "foul" up!
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