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‘Highly intoxicated’ Florida woman arrested for stabbing minivan with pitchfork
NY Post ^ | 07/21/2022 | Snejana Farberov

Posted on 07/21/2022 12:25:46 PM PDT by DFG

A “highly intoxicated” Florida woman was arrested for allegedly stabbing a minivan with a pitchfork — after she was spotted trying to sell teddy bears behind a supermarket.

Lisa Slone, 56, was hauled off to the Lake County Jail Tuesday afternoon following the incident at a Publix store in Minneola.

According to a Florida Highway Patrol report obtained by The Post, a manager at the supermarket on North Hancock Road told troopers who arrived after 2 p.m. that Slone was trying to hawk stuffed animals earlier in the day.

The manager also said that Slone, who was observed walking around with a black whip and a pitchfork, used the weapon to pierce a minivan — but the owner of the vehicle did not want police involved and offered to pay for the damage himself.

A trooper wrote in the report that he ordered Slone to drop the pitchfork, but she refused and walked away.

Slone was then taken into custody by force and placed in the back of a patrol car, where she was able to unbuckle her seatbelt and proceeded to kick at the rear window, prompting troopers to have her feet placed into a “hobble.”

(Excerpt) Read more at nypost.com ...


TOPICS: Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: florida; floridawoman; humor; pitchfork; slone; teddybears; weird
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EXTREMELY GUILTY!!!
1 posted on 07/21/2022 12:25:46 PM PDT by DFG
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To: DFG

Who has the eye bleach meme?


2 posted on 07/21/2022 12:27:20 PM PDT by Hyman Roth
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To: DFG

You’ve got to admit - she has nice hair!


3 posted on 07/21/2022 12:28:45 PM PDT by Ken522
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To: DFG

Whats wrong with stabbing minivans? I don’t get it. Torching them is even better.


4 posted on 07/21/2022 12:30:40 PM PDT by Seruzawa ("The Political left is the Garden of Eden of incompetence" - Marx the Smarter (Groucho))
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To: DFG; All

Oh, I dunno. If I was as drunk as she was-yeah, I’d hit it!


5 posted on 07/21/2022 12:30:54 PM PDT by mozarky2 (Ya never stand so tall as when ya stoop to stomp a statist...)
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To: DFG

She had a whip and a pitchfork. What about the handcuffs?


6 posted on 07/21/2022 12:33:01 PM PDT by laplata (They want each crisis to take the greatest toll possible.)
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To: DFG

.......The manager also said that Slone, who was observed walking around with a black whip and a pitchfork, used the weapon to pierce a minivan — but the owner of the vehicle did not want police involved and offered to pay for the damage himself.”

WTF?


7 posted on 07/21/2022 12:37:47 PM PDT by Nifty
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To: DFG

She looks like happy soul


8 posted on 07/21/2022 12:37:59 PM PDT by albie
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To: Nifty

Probably a “client” of hers and she got some bad drugs and went cray cray. He wanted to keep it on the down low.


9 posted on 07/21/2022 12:39:37 PM PDT by nascarnation (Let's Go Brandon!)
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To: DFG
Note - This is NOT her...


10 posted on 07/21/2022 12:40:35 PM PDT by Magnum44 (...against all enemies, foreign and domestic... )
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To: DFG

She was a lot hotter in High School when I dated her....


11 posted on 07/21/2022 12:41:16 PM PDT by PGR88
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To: DFG

Pitchforks are valuable commodities, to be saved for better occasions.


12 posted on 07/21/2022 12:41:39 PM PDT by rfp1234 (Comitia asinorum et rhinocerum delenda sunt.)
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To: albie

Yeah, she does have a nice smile. Maybe stabbing mini-vans is good for you, who knows, I’ve never tried it.


13 posted on 07/21/2022 12:42:05 PM PDT by Billthedrill
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To: DFG

she’s obviously pitching a fit...


14 posted on 07/21/2022 12:44:22 PM PDT by heavy metal (smiling improves your face value and makes people wonder what the hell you're up to... 😁)
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To: Magnum44

looks kinda hot...


15 posted on 07/21/2022 12:46:01 PM PDT by heavy metal (smiling improves your face value and makes people wonder what the hell you're up to... 😁)
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To: DFG
Teddy bear sales behind the supermarket must have been way down.
So she took out her frustrations on the minivan.
Hey, it happens.

Can you blame her?
After all, she was just a helpless pawn at the mercy of the stuffed animal deities - right?
Most likely almost out of gin too, I'd bet...

/s

16 posted on 07/21/2022 12:48:04 PM PDT by GaltAdonis
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To: DFG

Even, after 20 beers she [still] wouldn’t look good.


17 posted on 07/21/2022 12:48:30 PM PDT by mikelets456
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To: DFG
Slone was booked into the county jail on a charge of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon without intent to kill ...

Was she asked if she intended to kill the minivan? I sympathize, actually. Sometimes you've just had it with a vehicle.

18 posted on 07/21/2022 12:49:44 PM PDT by Tax-chick (Nature, art, silence, simplicity, peace. And fungi.)
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To: DFG
How did they find her? She was wearing her camo!
19 posted on 07/21/2022 12:51:20 PM PDT by immadashell (Save Innocent Lives: Ban Gun Free Zones)
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To: Hyman Roth

20 posted on 07/21/2022 12:53:36 PM PDT by Red Badger (Homeless veterans camp in the streets while illegal aliens are put up in hotels.....................)
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