Posted on 06/18/2022 9:14:20 AM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
GENEVA—This week, a panel of Bible scholars issued a joint statement clarifying that the Mark of the Beast is actually “$6.66”—the price of gas at the end of latter days.
“Deeper study has revealed that we were misreading this passage—it’s not 666 or 616, it’s $6.66 for your basic Unleaded Petroleum Gasoline!” French Bible scholar Pierre LeGault spoke for the panel of academics that had gathered at Geneva to redress and correct the historic interpretation of the mysterious number in Revelation 13. “Numerology is tough and we’ll be the first to admit we botched this one—but we’re here to make things right!”
The panel answered questions, fleshing out their new interpretation. “It’s felt apocalyptic for a few years now—once we figured out that we had already been enduring the final stages of divine judgment, it all clicked!” Other scholars on the panel concurred, proceeding to roll out a massive end-times prophecy chart culminating in a $6.66 gas ticker on the far right side.
At publishing time, the scholars were scrambling to explain why they shouldn’t be stoned as false prophets despite the gas ticker blasting through the $7 and $8 marks.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
Of course! Or maybe not.
The Scholars may be drinking too much Offertory Wine.
If the Bee was a baseball team, imagine the batting averages ...
.900 at least!
All I can say is I’m taking a picture of the pumps when that’s the price…we’re only about 90 cents away here now.
“...the Mark of the Beast is actually “$6.66”—the price of gas at the end of latter days. ...”
I concur.
It’s satire my friend. :^)
I think it is time for gas stations to drop the .9 cents now. It is kind of silly.
Then is the fatal head wound dementia?
Back then they only worried about 1 type of gas after eating Lentil Soup
You got me! Of course,the Babylon Bee. Who else.
You got me! Of course,the Babylon Bee. Who else.
Well, the first time I paid over $5 a gallon, my total was $66.66.
Bee headlines almost always give me that LOL guffaw. ;-)
Lordy I live The Bee
It’s The Bee
but only until the price is $6.67
Saw that in my e-mail this week. LOL funny.
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