Posted on 10/12/2021 5:29:41 PM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
WASHINGTON, D.C.—America collectively breathed a sigh of relief today as Dr. Fauci announced he was giving everyone permission to go trick or treating this year.
"I must clarify one thing, though—and let me be perfectly clear while I clarify one small point in order to make it clear for everyone, as clearly as I possibly can," said Fauci. "If your child is unvaccinated, he should NOT be given any of the good candy. No Reese's or Snickers or any of that. Candy Corn only. That's it."
Beloved NBC anchor Chuck Todd responded to Fauci's recommendation and asked for clarification. "So you mean to say they can ONLY get candy corn? Nothing else?"
"Well, maybe they can have an apple or a carrot or a toothbrush," Fauci replied. "If an unvaccinated kid is given the good candy, they may forget their proper station as unvaxxed second-class citizens. And watch out for... THE DROPLETS!" Fauci then shrieked and jumped out a nearby window, as it had been a stressful day.
The CDC confirmed Dr. Fauci's recommendations, before later reversing them due to public outcry, and also due to Fauci changing his mind again.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
I cut myself with a razor blade when I read something Fauci said. Stop posting this garbage.
Hey, it looks like Indian corn.
I think I’ll post some more of his stuff. You’re gonna look great with all those cuts on ya.
You call it corn . . . we call it maize, Paleface!
Candy Corn is a favorite.
Candy Corn flavored Oreos?
Hard to improve on the originals (Oreos, I mean) but I'd give those a try. They have me curious.
I know I should conform to Dr. Mengele’s candy recommendations, but we do have to eat the leftovers and eating candy corn would probably kill me.
;-)
You’re a braver man than I am. Partly because I’m not a man.
"No dear, that's just Dr. Fauci checking it's safety."
Here's a Top 25 Halloween Candies from TheDailyMeal.com (back to front):
25.Milk Duds
24.Life Savers
23.Almond Joy (Mounds ranked further down)
22.Three Musketeers
21.Lemonheads
20.Blow Pops
19.Dubble Bubble
18.Kit Kat (featuring glow-in-the-dark packaging and a limited time chocolate mint flavor)
17.Twix
16.Swedish Fish
15.Milky Way
14.Hershey's Mini-Bars (classic, dark, Krakel, Mr. Goodbar)
13.Taffy
12.Butterfinger (new recipe)
11.Jolly Ranchers
10.Hershey's Kisses
9.Sour Patch Kids
8.Tootsie Pops
7.Hot Tomales
6.Candy Corn
5.Starburst
4.Snickers
3.M&Ms
2.Reese's
1.Skittles
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