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We Have A Lot Of Words We'd Like To Call Joe Biden Right Now But We Are A Christian Website So Here Are Some G-Rated Alternatives
The Babylon Bee ^ | August 26 2021 | The Babylon Bee

Posted on 08/29/2021 6:35:10 PM PDT by xp38

We have a lot of feelings right now, and it's hard to process. Sometimes, we just want to say a cussword, like unbelievers or lesser satire sites, like The Onion, which is the atheist knockoff of The Babylon Bee. But we will refrain from doing so. Instead, here are ten G-rated cuss words to describe Joe Biden

1. No-good son of a biscuit - Sometimes he just makes us so frakkin' mad!

2. Dog-faced pony soldier - This one's technically not vulgar so it's OK to use his own insult against him.

3. A real donkeyhole - This is borderline offensive but we feel the gravity of the situation calls us to use the D-word.

4. An ass but just in the way the King James Version uses it - Loophole!

5. #@$)(#@)()@#$3247@$#%@#%$&%&#@*&%#*& - Sorry, we lost control for a second there.

6. A foolish virgin who didn't take any oil to meet the bridegroom - Brutal and savage, but accurate.

7. A Harry Potter fan - Now that's just low.

8. A dog who returns to his own vomit - Kinda accurate tbh

9. A real donkeywipe - Might want to stop reading this list to your kids at this point.

10. A confused, lost, senile old man who's unfit for the presidency - Sorry, someone had to say it.

Feel free to use any of these when discussing the president!


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor; Poetry
KEYWORDS: loophole
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I'd change Harry Potter to Nickelback fan
1 posted on 08/29/2021 6:35:10 PM PDT by xp38
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To: xp38

How about a ******g traitor?


2 posted on 08/29/2021 6:37:00 PM PDT by OKSooner (Always say, "After the fair trial".)
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To: xp38

North end of a Southbound mule.


3 posted on 08/29/2021 6:37:48 PM PDT by cdcdawg (Galt's Gulch: so amazing that it's literally unreal!)
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To: xp38

In 1961 there was a movie called, “One-Eyed Jack”. It was a cowboy starting Marlon Brando. Back then you couldn’t cuss in movies. Two different lines which I always loved and offer up:

“You big gob of spit”

and

“You big tub of guts”.


4 posted on 08/29/2021 6:39:53 PM PDT by Portcall24
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To: xp38

Shakespeare to the rescue.

Feculent clot pole.

Thou sodden-witted lord! Thou hast no more brain than I have in mine elbows...

Heaven truly knows that thou art false as hell

Thy sin’s not accidental, but a trade.

A most notable coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly promise breaker, the owner of no one good quality.


5 posted on 08/29/2021 6:40:32 PM PDT by Dead Corpse (A Psalm in napalm...)
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To: Dead Corpse

Very elegant!


6 posted on 08/29/2021 6:46:32 PM PDT by Not A Snowbird (I do not recognize Biden’s authority.)
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To: Dead Corpse

Joe, a pasty pated pusillanimous prig.


7 posted on 08/29/2021 6:46:54 PM PDT by seowulf (Civilization begins with order, grows with liberty, and dies with chaos...Will Durant)
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To: xp38

8 posted on 08/29/2021 6:47:26 PM PDT by Trillian
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To: xp38

A three day old tub of putrid skunk squeezings.

The part that ran down....errr nix this one.

How bad is Joe Biden?
His momma shoulda SWALLOWED!

Gonna get myself in trouble.
I’m out.


9 posted on 08/29/2021 6:48:03 PM PDT by oldvirginian (I’m getting tired of being part of a major historical event.)
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To: Dead Corpse

He hath not so much brains as ear-wax...


10 posted on 08/29/2021 6:51:29 PM PDT by decal (MOLON JABE)
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To: xp38
Have you been watching The Chase?
11 posted on 08/29/2021 6:54:41 PM PDT by TBP (Progressives lack compassion and tolerance. Their self-aggrandizement is all that matters. )
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To: xp38

How about:

A lying, senile, racist grifter credibly accused of sexual assault


12 posted on 08/29/2021 6:55:35 PM PDT by TBP (Progressives lack compassion and tolerance. Their self-aggrandizement is all that matters. )
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To: Dead Corpse

“A most notable coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly promise breaker, the owner of no one good quality.”

Oh, that’s a *good* one. Way to go, Bill.


13 posted on 08/29/2021 6:56:31 PM PDT by dsc (Thus have I had thee, as a dream doth flatter, In sleep a king, but waking no such matter.)
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To: xp38

I think I would use the quote that Doc Holiday was supposed to have said..

I will be your Huckle Bearer.

Yes that is right, he would say that as well as the other.

You know what Huckle Bearer means no?


14 posted on 08/29/2021 6:56:47 PM PDT by crz
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To: xp38

You gunkie|!!


15 posted on 08/29/2021 6:57:26 PM PDT by SkyDancer
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To: TBP

No. Is there some connection to this?


16 posted on 08/29/2021 6:58:46 PM PDT by xp38
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To: xp38

The Babylon Bee does it again... Thanks!!!


17 posted on 08/29/2021 7:00:47 PM PDT by Deplorable American1776 (I'm the one trying to save American Democracy...Donald Trump 6/5/21 at the NCGOP convention)
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To: xp38

“Dear God, either turn him to You or remove him.”

How is that prayer?


18 posted on 08/29/2021 7:01:23 PM PDT by Fai Mao (I don't think we have enough telephone poles.)
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To: xp38

ONE MORE TO ADD:

Let’s hear the applause for
the Richard Cranium of all time!


19 posted on 08/29/2021 7:02:43 PM PDT by V K Lee (Resist, we will! Remember, we must!)
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To: xp38
Just about the time you posted that you'd replace Harry Potter with Nickelback, the contestant on The Chase was saying he liked to do karaoke and his go-to is a Nickelback song, and the other "chasers" were kibitzing about how bad it must be to do Nickelback in public. Literally just about the time you posted that comment. So I wondered if you were watching.
20 posted on 08/29/2021 7:03:52 PM PDT by TBP (Progressives lack compassion and tolerance. Their self-aggrandizement is all that matters. )
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