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First-Ever Pride Month Ruined By 40 Days Of Rain
Babylon Bee ^
| 6/01/2021
| Babylon Bee
Posted on 06/02/2021 8:23:42 AM PDT by BipolarBob
MESOPOTAMIA—It was going to be the first-ever Pride Month — a celebration of everyone doing everything they feel like doing in their hearts all the time — when it suddenly started raining and didn’t stop for forty days as God tried to wash all the wickedness off the earth.
“Ugh. Well, this ruins everything,” said one man, who had looked forward to the celebration but was instead climbing to the top of a building to get away from the ever-rising water.
This was going to be a celebration unlike anything the world had ever seen, and everyone was looking forward to it — except for Noah, a notorious stick in the mud.
“We’re all getting ready for a fun party,” said Noah’s neighbor, “and there he is, working on some boat or something. He won’t even wear his pride robe.”
The boat ended up being a boon for Noah as the flood covered the face of the entire earth and even led to some conspiracy theories that Noah knew this was going to happen.
Thanks to all life being wiped out, it will probably be a very long time before there is another pride month. Next time, the people plan to use the rainbow symbol to constantly remind God during the festivities that, no matter how wicked they get, He said He wouldn’t flood them again.
TOPICS: Conspiracy; History; Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee
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And there you have the story on how the rainbow became the signal for Pride in Perversity.
To: BipolarBob
Whoah! This satire is totally based!
2
posted on
06/02/2021 8:25:03 AM PDT
by
MNDude
To: BipolarBob
Every time you see the rainbow this month, remember the Lord’s promise to us.
I love the Babylon Bee!
3
posted on
06/02/2021 8:28:12 AM PDT
by
freemama
To: MNDude
Just spreading the word and educating the masses.
4
posted on
06/02/2021 8:28:48 AM PDT
by
BipolarBob
(This is my chainsaw. There are many like it but this one is mine.)
To: BipolarBob; 100American; al baby; Allegra; BufordP; dp0622; DoodleBob; EveningStar; Gefn; ...
To: BipolarBob
As it was in the days of Noah.
6
posted on
06/02/2021 8:36:25 AM PDT
by
ClearCase_guy
("I see you did something -- why you so racist?")
To: ClearCase_guy
Except it won't be a flood next time.
7
posted on
06/02/2021 8:38:02 AM PDT
by
BipolarBob
(This is my chainsaw. There are many like it but this one is mine.)
To: SunkenCiv
8
posted on
06/02/2021 8:39:06 AM PDT
by
a fool in paradise
(Lean on Joe Biden to follow Donald Trump's example and donate his annual salary to charity.)
The rain was only slightly annoying, it was the hordes of locusts and californians descending upon the land and destroying everything standing that got really annoying
9
posted on
06/02/2021 8:41:05 AM PDT
by
dsrtsage
( Complexity is just simple lacking imagination)
To: BipolarBob
Next headline you might see is “Google, Facebook, and Twitter To Move Into New Highrise Headquarters: Tower To Heaven.”
10
posted on
06/02/2021 8:41:22 AM PDT
by
seowulf
To: BipolarBob
I blame Jesse Jackson and his “rainbow coalition”.
Sure Jesse meant it about race, but it put the rainbow symbol on the radar for all liberal groups.
11
posted on
06/02/2021 8:44:14 AM PDT
by
DannyTN
(,)
To: BipolarBob
To: BipolarBob
The Bee is not far off the mark on this one. The pride flag will be the official flag of the tribulation.
In the time of the coming of the Son of Man, life will be as it was in the days of Noah. People ate and drank, married and were given in marriage, right up to the day when Noah entered the ark—and then came the flood and destroyed them all. It will be just the same as it was in the days of Lot. People ate and drank, bought and sold, planted and built, but on the day that Lot left Sodom, it rained fire and brimstone from heaven, and destroyed them all.
13
posted on
06/02/2021 8:54:55 AM PDT
by
Rodm
To: Rodm
The pride flag will be the official flag of the tribulation.
Where is that in the Bible?
To: BipolarBob
Rain! I should think Pride Month ought to start Sodom and Gomorrah style.
15
posted on
06/02/2021 9:04:00 AM PDT
by
Responsibility2nd
(I love my country. It’s my government that I hate.)
To: BipolarBob
Darn it... should have known at “Mesopotamia.”
16
posted on
06/02/2021 9:17:07 AM PDT
by
Mathews
(It's all gravy, baby!)
To: Carpe Cerevisi
“Where is that in the Bible?”
Read the book of Mormon.
wy69
To: BipolarBob
BTW - there is now:
Pride Month
Black History Month
Breast Cancer Month
What else?
To: whitney69
Read the book of Mormon.
No offense, but no thank you.
To: BipolarBob
I guess that Noah was a “bigot” like me!!!! (sarc/)
20
posted on
06/02/2021 9:50:36 AM PDT
by
Honorary Serb
(Kosovo is Serbia! Free Srpska! Abolish ICTY!)
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