Posted on 05/22/2021 10:31:59 AM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
MIDDLE EAST—The United States has long been buying weapons for both sides of various conflicts in the Middle East. But now, with multiple financial crises going on at home, the U.S. is looking for ways to reduce the cost of these conflicts. Finally, they landed on a solution: they'll cut out the middleman -- defense contractors -- and just have the countries lob giant sacks of American tax dollars at each other directly.
"Instead of going through the whole rigamarole of buying weapons for them, or letting them buy weapons from us at a discount, or supplying insurgent groups with weapons -- which is all very exhausting -- we'll just hand them a catapult and a bunch of money and let them go to town," said one American general. "It's much more efficient and cost-effective. Plus, we now have to spend less rebuilding the countries we just spent trillions blowing up. Since, you know, the sacks of dollars just kind of land with a thud. They can hurt if they hit you right on the head, but that's hard to do."
Israel quickly invented a "Green Dome" -- paid for with American tax dollars -- that will intercept the bags of money launched at them from Palestine and throw them right back. However, they later admitted the state-of-the-art defense system was just a bunch of trampolines lined up along the border.
If Xiden’s going to raise taxes, might as well couple those hikes with some savings!
DANG!
While we need a little humor now and then, these MULTIPLE Babylon Bee posts are getting old and slightly annoying to have to sift through to get to the actual news. Is there another forum they can be posted on.
Bee is getting semi-serious.
Its funny. This reminds me of a story that a college friend shared with me. In 2007 he was stationed in Iraq, in the “triangle of death.”
One of his jobs was to drive to a large Air Force base, pick up a duffle bag full of American Cash, and drive it back to his post. It would then be distributed to the local “bosses” so that they would keep their folks in line.
They also distributed it to other American posts where it would be used to pay contractors.
American dollars make the world go round, since 1945. So...just sending them dollars to throw at each other is nothing too far from the truth.
Nothing wrong with posting from the Bee.
At least its not a bunch of vanaties.
When I just want the serious stuff, I click on the news/activism forum. General chat is, well, general and chatty. :-)
Too true. How about if we take care of the USA for a change and let other countries fight their own battles.
Enough of this drop at a time stuff heat up the cow
Just don’t look under “Chat.”
Sorry to have been grouchy. Carry on.
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