Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Joe Biden at the "Pearly Gates"
FreeRepublic ^ | November 28, 2020 | Self

Posted on 11/28/2020 10:18:18 AM PST by Jess Kitting

Joe Biden dies and is met by Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates.

"How do I get in?" asks Biden.

"Simple." replies St. Peter. You beat me at a game of "Two Truths and One Lie."

"I can do that." says Joe confidently.

"All right." says Peter. "You go first."

Biden makes his three statements:

"I am a good Catholic; I legitimately won the 2020 election; and I'm an idiot."

"Sorry." replies Peter. "That's two lies and one truth."

"You lose."

"C'mon. That's not fair!" replies Biden. "You haven't won anything. What are your two truths and one lie?"

To which his friend replies:

"Those aren't the pearly gates; I'm not Saint Peter; and you are an idiot.

(Excerpt) Read more at freerepublic.com ...


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: chat; humor; vanity
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-29 next last

1 posted on 11/28/2020 10:18:18 AM PST by Jess Kitting
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting
Good one!

I thought the joke was going to lead to St. Peter asking Biden to recite one of his favorite 'Palms'.

2 posted on 11/28/2020 10:24:00 AM PST by mellow velo
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting

Three truths. The joke is screwed up.


3 posted on 11/28/2020 10:26:10 AM PST by madison10
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: madison10

You think Joe Biden could manage to come up with three truths?


4 posted on 11/28/2020 10:27:11 AM PST by Jess Kitting
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting

Don’t worry, Joe - it’s a dry heat.


5 posted on 11/28/2020 10:27:53 AM PST by dainbramaged (Windage and Elevation)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting
What is your name?

What is your quest?

What is your favorite color?

6 posted on 11/28/2020 10:28:52 AM PST by Texas Eagle (If it wasn't for double-standards, Liberals would have no standards at all.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting

Tough crowd.


7 posted on 11/28/2020 10:31:59 AM PST by Rappini (Compromise has its place. It's called second.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: madison10

How is it messed up?


8 posted on 11/28/2020 10:32:12 AM PST by Kirkwood (Follow your Inner Trump)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting; Fred Nerks

HELL can be tricky.


9 posted on 11/28/2020 10:36:59 AM PST by Candor7 ((Obama Fascism:http://www.americanthinker.com/2009/05/barack_obama_the_quintessentia_1.html) )
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting

Biden, Pence and Trump are at the pearly gates, and St. Peter says that you have to correctly answer one question to get in. Trump walks up confidently and says I will go first.
St. Peter asks, “What are the names of the people that live in France?” Trump says “the French” and St. Peter welcomes him. Pence steps up, and St. Peter says, “what are the name of the people that live in Germany?”. Pence says “”the Germans”,..Pence walks through the gate.
The self-proclaimed “devote Catholic” walks up saying this will be easy. St. Peter asks, “what are the names of the people that live in China?”. Biden starts walking forward saying “the Chinese”. St. Peter, stops him, and says, “no, the names, the names !”


10 posted on 11/28/2020 10:37:26 AM PST by Tadhg
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting
Oops. Should be you aren't an idiot.
11 posted on 11/28/2020 10:41:15 AM PST by Jess Kitting
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting

C’mon MAN!


12 posted on 11/28/2020 10:41:58 AM PST by bigbob (Trust Trump. Trust the Plan.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Texas Eagle

13 posted on 11/28/2020 10:45:08 AM PST by DoodleBob (Gravity's waiting period is about 9.8 m/s^2)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 6 | View Replies]

To: DoodleBob

Wait, what? A European or African swallow?


14 posted on 11/28/2020 10:46:49 AM PST by Texas Eagle (If it wasn't for double-standards, Liberals would have no standards at all.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 13 | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting

Exactly. Thanks.


15 posted on 11/28/2020 10:54:35 AM PST by madison10
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 11 | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting

See post #11.


16 posted on 11/28/2020 10:55:12 AM PST by madison10
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: Kirkwood

See post #11.


17 posted on 11/28/2020 10:55:44 AM PST by madison10
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: Texas Eagle

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pWS8Mg-JWSg

What is the average speed of a laden spring talked swallow !


18 posted on 11/28/2020 11:03:43 AM PST by Truthoverpower (The guv-mint you get is the Trump winning express ! Yea haw ! Trump Pence II! Save America again )
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 6 | View Replies]

To: madison10

Thanks!


19 posted on 11/28/2020 11:09:41 AM PST by Jess Kitting
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 17 | View Replies]

To: Jess Kitting

Ax him to give you three troofs.


20 posted on 11/28/2020 11:09:56 AM PST by laweeks (Just wait till you have to have a biopsy from your prostate, now that is an experience you will neve)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-29 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson