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Report: Hunter Biden Documents Were Lost By Jewish-American UPS Driver Hillzekiah Clintonstein
The Babylon Bee ^ | October 29, 2020 | The Babylon Bee

Posted on 11/01/2020 5:19:48 PM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks

U.S.—Tucker Carlson says UPS lost his Hunter Biden documents. UPS has reported that the driver who misplaced the incriminating evidence was a Jewish-American delivery man named Hillzekiah Clintonstein.

"I seem to have lost all the evidence on Hunter Biden - oy vey!" he said in a gruff voice as he stroked his long, black beard. "I was just on my way to synagogue when I realized it was gone. I thought I had left it under my pile of dreidels. I even checked under my yarmulke, but it wasn't there! Oh no!"

Clintonstein further said he'll look for it every day this week, except on Shabbat, since "You know, we Jews don't work on Shabbat, according to wiki--I mean, my rabbi!"

(Excerpt) Read more at mail.yahoo.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Conspiracy; Humor; Miscellaneous; Religion; Travel; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; clintonstein; hunterbiden; lostpackage; package; satire; tuckercarlson; ups
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1 posted on 11/01/2020 5:19:48 PM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
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To: 100American; al baby; Allegra; BufordP; dp0622; EveningStar; Gefn; GunsareOK; JRios1968; ...

Oy, vey!

DANG!


2 posted on 11/01/2020 5:20:46 PM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks (Hope is not a plan. -- Matthew Bracken)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Funny.

Aside: some have said the package was opened ... be interesting to see what was removed. Should have been transported in person.


3 posted on 11/01/2020 5:21:52 PM PST by Rurudyne (Standup Philosopher)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Any relation to Hilluigi Clintonelli?


4 posted on 11/01/2020 5:22:08 PM PST by seowulf
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

https://babylonbee.com/news/ups-driver-who-lost-biden-documents-revealed-to-be-hillary-clinton


5 posted on 11/01/2020 5:23:13 PM PST by BipolarBob (Rome wasn't built in a day. All Hail the night shift!)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

ROTFLMAO!


6 posted on 11/01/2020 5:27:24 PM PST by Howie66 ("Ghislane Maxwell Didn't Kill Herself")
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To: Rurudyne

the package was opened ... be interesting to see what was removed ....

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

It was a flash drive.

“Carlson said UPS executives told him on Thursday that an employee at the Manhattan store on 43rd Street had found the flash drive on the floor, and had dropped it on a supervisor’s desk.”

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8895673/Tucker-Carlson-reveals-lost-Hunter-Biden-docs-FLOOR-UPS-store.html


7 posted on 11/01/2020 5:28:52 PM PST by Qiviut (Fox "News": Unfair, Unbalanced & Unhinged.)
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To: Qiviut

Liars.


8 posted on 11/01/2020 5:35:29 PM PST by madison10
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Like with a cloth?


9 posted on 11/01/2020 5:37:04 PM PST by SaveFerris (Luke 17:28 ... as it was in the days of Lot; they did eat, they drank, they bought, they sold ......)
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To: madison10

More likely:

Tucker Carlson Updates the Mysterious Case of UPS and the Missing and Reappearing Hunter Biden/Bobulinski Documents…
https://theconservativetreehouse.com/2020/10/29/tucker-carlson-updates-the-mysterious-case-of-ups-and-the-missing-and-reappearing-hunter-biden-bobulinski-documents/

When it absolutely, positively, has to be copied by the FBI overnight…

FBI integrity? Honorable rank and file? Please, spare me the oxygen…

I review this story from a position that I cannot fully explain. However, I have personal experience -recent experience- with a similar and rather unusual situation that cannot be explained by any method other than DHS surveillance.

So here’s what I think took place.

The package, likely a Fed-X or UPS overnight delivery, was intercepted by FBI agents using mechanisms for tracking and surveillance that open targeting through portals connected to DHS.

As an outcome of the U.S. Patriot Act, the U.S. Dept. of Homeland Security has an agreement in place with mail shipping companies, public/private services, that essentially allows them a link to the proprietary portal to track all in-state and interstate mail deliveries.

The FBI has access to this data network in the same way the FBI has access to federal transportation records. When you book a flight and DHS portals are open that allow FBI to track your movements domestically. This type of portal is also accessed in private company transportation like Uber, Lyft etc. DHS, and as a consequence the FBI, can easily track your whereabouts using public or private transportation. You willingly carry a transponder -called a cell phone- that assists them with their tracking.

Without much hesitation I will bet the FBI was legally monitoring the communication of Tony Bobulinski, and by extension the entire Tucker Carlson production network. Once the Hunter Biden records shipment was known to be taking place, the DHS portals are opened; the package containing the flash drive is tracked; and the FBI moves in to intercept the delivery.

The transport company (all of them) doesn’t need to be participating because they are essentially unneeded. Their system network is connected to DHS and by extension the FBI. Once the flash drive is copied it then mysteriously reappears… go figure.

That’s the likely scenario.

Wanna bet?


10 posted on 11/01/2020 5:40:19 PM PST by Qiviut (Fox "News": Unfair, Unbalanced & Unhinged.)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Just as I expected... /s


11 posted on 11/01/2020 5:43:50 PM PST by SuperLuminal (Where is Sam Adams now that we desperately need him)
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To: Qiviut

Very plausible explanation,..................that way the commie-crats, their attorneys & their subversive allies @ DOJ can remain fully informed as to what their criminal exposure is.....


12 posted on 11/01/2020 5:46:26 PM PST by Trump_vs_Evil_Witch (Clean out the CIA & FBI, top-to-bottom, Haspel & Wray first)
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To: Qiviut

Sounds like a good theory to me.


13 posted on 11/01/2020 5:55:41 PM PST by greeneyes ( Moderation In Pursuit of Justice is NO Virtue--LET FREEDOM RING)
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To: Rurudyne

“be interesting to see what was removed. “

Where. have you been the last week>


14 posted on 11/01/2020 6:16:33 PM PST by TexasGator (Z1z)
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To: Qiviut

Sounds very plausible.


15 posted on 11/01/2020 6:21:29 PM PST by madison10
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To: TexasGator

Taking care of my handicapped sister ... like always.


16 posted on 11/01/2020 6:23:52 PM PST by Rurudyne (Standup Philosopher)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Babylon Bee is funny. I’m not sure what they’ll do after the election...


17 posted on 11/01/2020 6:55:51 PM PST by ConservaTeen (Vote Trump. The Dems will let the UN run America!! Voting America First...)
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To: Qiviut

Why would the FBI hijack a flash drive that contains information from a computer that has been in FBI custody for a year?
Doesn’t make sense.


18 posted on 11/01/2020 6:58:13 PM PST by Fireone (Build the gallows first, then the Wall!)
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To: Qiviut

Maybe that’s why UPS isn’t talking to FOX about what happened. They were told to keep it shut. They would have had to assist the FBI in the intercept since they had the package.


19 posted on 11/01/2020 7:02:52 PM PST by inpajamas ( https://devilsnemesis.com - Texas Akbar!!!)
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To: Fireone

The flash drive was from Bobalinski, not H Bidens laptop


20 posted on 11/01/2020 7:04:04 PM PST by crosdaddy
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