Ralph Northam: 'A Militia Assembling To Defend Their Rights Against Tyranny Is A Dangerous First In American History'

Babylon Bee ^ | 01/21/2020 | Babylon Bee

[BipolarBob]

RICHMOND, VA—Governor Ralph Northam condemned the group of gun owners who assembled yesterday, calling the concept "simply un-American."

"A militia assembling to defend their rights against tyranny is a dangerous first in American history," he said to a group of reporters, still teary-eyed from the tragic lack of violence at yesterday's rally. "This is not what America was founded on. It is not what our forefathers would have wanted."

"This well-regulated militia having the right to bear arms is diametrically opposed to everything the Founding Fathers wanted for our country." The governor said that Washington, Jefferson, and "those other guys" all probably did not like guns very much and when forced to fight would have used pointy sticks.

"It was not until the Trump administration that Americans started liking guns."

Northam said that we could have a better idea what the founders would have thought about guns, but sadly, "they did not see fit to leave us a document by which we might guard our country."

[Big Red Badger]

Got me too.

[Blood of Tyrants]

It’s not far from what they believe.

[MuttTheHoople]

Coonman the black baby-killer speaks for the demoKKKrats.

[Deplorable American1776]

What is dangerous is Ralph Northam as an elected official, not guns...😋

[patriotfury]

Ralphy’s northham expels so much CO2, he doesn’t even have use for his southham.

[DivineMomentsOfTruth]

The Babylon Bee has been sounding tame compared to what the Democrats are actually doing and saying.

[Theodore R.]

VA seems really to know how to pick tyrants in elections.

[Savage Beast]

Northam must have gone to one of these modern schools that teach protesting and social justice but not history.

Either that, or he slept through history class.

[wally_bert]

No doubt.

[Pajamajan]

Babylon-Bee BUMP

Not hard to imagine Lord Northam saying this though.

[BenLurkin]

Psssst…the word “Satire” has got to be in the thread title.

[BipolarBob]

I put it in the keywords. AND if I put it in the title I on’t fool anybody into responding before they realize they’ve been duped.

[Captain Peter Blood]

Is this Idiot for real, he flunked Civics and American History. He’s the Tyrant!!!!!!

[CodeToad]

The bimbo doesn’t have an education.

[BipolarBob]

It’s Babylon Bee Pete. Sheath the sword and lower the mast.

[TnTnTn]

He should have attended history class instead of doing blackface at parties....what a pos...

[Nik Naym]

I read the headline and had no clue it was satire until I saw the source. The leftys are so far out we can’t even make up stuff about them that is worse than what they actually do and say.

[Toespi]

If I wasn’t so tired, I would get up, get my ancestors records, all twenty three of them, and list the militias they belonged to during the American Revolution.

[Ransomed]

“Northam went on to say that he occasionally still picks black face paint out of his saggy neck folds. “Every time the q-tip comes out dark, I feel the burning shame of Coonman all over again,” said the Governor.”

Just gross man.

Freegards

[Lurkinanloomin]

He already took Bloomberg’s money, he has to deliver.