Posted on 06/20/2019 10:03:45 AM PDT by Responsibility2nd
“My boyfriend can’t get over how many people I’ve slept with. I shouldn’t have told him, but he pressed me for the info. He was 'nerdy’ for most of high school and college, and just started coming into his own in his mid to late 20s. I have been dating consistently for years, and have had my fair share of hookups and relationships. And while I don’t think my number is crazy at all, he can’t deal with the discrepancy. We’ve been dating for two years and we’re serious. I don’t want to break up. How can I handle this?”
I agree that you probably shouldn’t have told him, but lots of people fall into the trap of discussing their sexual history with their current partner, and I get it. If you trust someone, it’s natural to want to talk about what you’ve learned from past relationships and sexual experiences. That said, numbers really aren’t necessary, and rarely do anything aside from making one person feel bad.
But you can’t go back, and his reaction may have provoked an important conversation. After all (and as you well know), this isn’t an issue of who has slept with more people. It’s about his comfort with his past, and it’s about both of you establishing that your needs are being met by this relationship.
First, you have to figure out the problem you’re tackling, because it will change the course of action.
(Excerpt) Read more at yahoo.com ...
Porcupine .........
You’ve got male posters on this thread to think the same way towards women.
You're the one who said wife-beating was a "shibboleth" right? Gosh, I bet you're a hero in some circles. Pray, sir, could you please give me an example of my blatant hyperbole and histrionic cliches? Oh, and let me know which ones are hyperbole and which ones are cliches so I don't get confused?
Symbolic.
I wouldn't compare the extremes... Alabama wasn't ISIS. But you could compare it to Malaysia. However, if you decide I'm not worth responding to anymore, be assured, I won't be sad.
Train? Well this was this one party I went to...........
Psychological cages, not literal ones. You know, the bird in the gilded cage, that sort of thing.
His point was that it wasn’t as common as feminists like to portray it.
Your example still fails.
The reality is that women are more than likely than men to compare their currently relationships to previous ones is a valid concern about a woman who has had a lot of relationships.
Proof?
Matthew 5:21-22; 23:27-28
Take it up with Samuel Richardson, 18th century novelist. He was the first one who wrote of women as being like birds in a cage.
“A man having sex with a bunch of women pre-marriage doesn’t in any way limit his ability to provide and take care of a single woman. A woman who has had 50+ partners is going to make the guy really nervous about just who that baby daddy is (especially with the court system today skewed against men).”
How is this even an issue today? DNA tests are extremely easy and cheap to get (and almost all women know it too). All you need to do is swab the baby’s cheek and mail it off in private.
Is that really your excuse about why it’s fine for men to screw around left, right, and center, but not women? What about the likelihood they’ll have illegit kids, STDs, and a habit of promiscuity that could lead to cheating? It’s easier to preach self-restraint to all young people, rather than just aiming the message at women, especially in the modern era where many women are the bigger family providers than the men and it’s so easy to determine who the father is of any child.
That which can be asserted without proof can be dismissed without comment. Show proof. Because I've seen plenty of wife-beating even in my own family.
You said 70 years ago. Now you’re moving the goalposts.
Absolutely a great post!
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