Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
Put the Kettle on and have a Cup of Tea, That stuff fixes anything.
((Hugs))
Oh boy, a Disco Ball.
A very rare sighting,these days.
Used to be found everywhere ,now only found on Nature reserves and Specialist Zoos.
Chocolate. I prescribe chocolate.
A Dryer load here is £1.60.
Frostbite Falls didn’t move. The north atlantic did. Or rather, it covered over the land mass that made the UK, Greenland, Iceland, and Canada all one contiguous property. This explains why nobbody but the English Speaking could ever make a go of North America. Not Eric the Red’s people and not the Aleuts who wandered over a land bridge from Siberia.
This has been English land since God said, “Let there be light!” And no mere mortals are going to change that, whether it be to French or Spanish.
That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it.
Coming inside from the Ramada can do that to a person.
I’d suggest removing the batteries from your mood swing. Maybe that would help?
Indeed!
It is also backed up by Scientific and known Physical events.
:)
I’ll check the Sagas.....
Odd that the European who made his discovery of the new world stick spoke Italian...
Sorry you’re suddenly unhappy. I hope it passes!
I’ve been cleaning in the living room. There was corn in the overhead light fixture. I could speculate as to how it got there, but it would just make me dizzy.
The carpet cleaner is coming tomorrow.
That was Central America. And he did such a lousy job that he was brought home in chains. But, you’re right, he did make sure he’d show up in the history books before he messed things up so badly.
Bullwinkle the Moose spoke Italian? Or did I miss a change of subject?
I took off an earring while I was talking to the carpet cleaner on the phone, because it kept hitting the screen of the phone and shutting it off. Then, when I realized I was wearing only one earring, I took it off and put it somewhere. Now I’ve found the one I originally took off, but I can’t remember where the other is.
I’ve had days like this with my shoes, too.
You mean Nevada Southern? They have some interesting stuff there including a radioactive locomotive from the Test Site, but their operable stuff is all diesel. Of course diesel locomotives are trains too. ;-)
To get some steam train action you need to truck up 93 to Ely..
One must pay attention to the ratio of coffee to water lest you end up with lightly tinted undrinkable brew.. :-(
And after the novelty of the Keurig wears off you will slowly realize that it produces a spectacularly mediocre cup of coffee..
(My unsolicited opinion. Your mileage may vary. ;-)
For a minute there, I thought you were going to say something teddibly English, like, “Keep a stiff upper lip.” But the idea of tea sounds much better, thanks! ;o]
Well, you know, I just looked in the fridge, and way in the back, I found a plastic baggie that had some objects that were flat and dark colored.
On closer inspection, it was some CHOCOLATE that had been sent to me by a very dear FRiend who used to live in CA.
I think this is the 80% stuff...which explains why it still tastes so doggone good! ;o]
Not on your nelly, not around these parts. I’ve seen enough people carried out of here on a rail to know not to use that kind of phrase. :)
I like your story, and I have seen that very same story. In fact part of the rift that Loch Ness sits on is the same bedrock. It just shifted to the north and east.
Ah, but the first one spoke Viking!!! (And not the Minnesota kind!)
It will pass. Sometimes, I can deal with the mood swings in a few minutes, but other times, like today, they are so powerful that they overwhelm me.
Corn. In the light fixture. It’s not my fault. I didn’t do it. No one saw me. You can’t prove it.
Mental visualization exam:
What happens to a disco ball when hit with a 12 gauge blast.
Full choke.
(To add interest you could picture the BeeGees standing behind..)
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