Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
*tagline*
Gotham forecast at weather.com is down to 80% chance of snow (from 100%) with 1-3 inches of accumulation (down from 8-10).
Just as I figgured. All blow and now hard around here.
But when that changes, DSNY will be ready.
Local radio still forecasting 12-24” and high winds starting Fri late afternoon. Have lots of high end SUVs and AWD’s in accidents this rush hr. with iced roads and light snow cover.
All the way up to 30 here but with a real feel of - welll - 30.
Not bad at all.
That’s F’s, not C’s.
DSNY, at the head and tail of every NYC parade!
Looks like the eye of the storm is centered over DC, and it is going to be a Hecka Storm.
Stay warm, my FRiend, and dress for the worst.
And every snowstorm.
Would you believe our software had to make a specific accommodation for a mirrored truck that is used sometimes in parades? I’ve never seen it.
Weather.com and NWS don’t agree on everything, I guess. We have a blizzard wath from Saturday a.m. through Sunday p.m.
I have no plans to travel except on foot.
Now Weather.com is reminding me of that old movie, “How to Stuff a Wild Bikini.”
Today - 36
Tonight 23
Fri - 34
In the movie she was supposed to be 36-22-36.
We’re close, anyway.
I’m working on my second million.
I gave up on the first, it was too hard...
That’s what the late Igor used to say! LOL!
I hope you’re feeling much better, now.
Monopoly is a child of The Great Depression. Another six hours was no problem to someone who quite literally had nothing else to do.
Mine did.
'Pastafarian' will lose his licence if caught driving without a colander on his head
Yes much! Still a little bit of a ache, but at least I’m able to sleep.
Busier than a cat trying to cover fecal matter on a tin roof at the moment.
I am so glad for you! Sleep is a wonderful thing, and without it, the aches ache more and the hurts hurt more. That’s true with physical as well as emotional aches and hurts.
Great tagline!
I’m so glad you approve!
Are you sleeping warmer these cold nights?
And did you tell me if you bought flannel sheets, as well? They work wonders in the summer as a light blanket, as well as an insulator in the winter.
:o]
*groan*
No sheets yet,and thanks for the reminder !!
Good point. Mom, my brother, and I once played for three days while we were snowed in, with the oven on for heat.
However, yesterday we had to get supper and then Mom had to leave for the airport by 6:00.
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