Skip to comments.And your best pirate joke is ???
Posted on 09/19/2015 7:43:04 AM PDT by llevrok
In "honor" of Talk Like A Pirate Day, What's your best or favorite pirate joke?
Mine? A pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel attached to his belt buckle. The bartender asks him what that's all about.
"I don't know", says himself. "But's it's driving me nuts!"
Great. Another pirate joke thread!
oh that’s bad.....rofl...........
Why don’t pirates take a bath before they walk the plank?
They’ll just wash up on shore later
My favorite Pirate Joke:
A sunken chest with no booty.
Avast! Your killing me.
“I’d only had the hook three days.”
do you know why pirates can never learn their ABC’s ?
They get stuck on L-M-N-O-P-Q - Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
How much did the pirate pay to have his ears pierced?
A buck an ear.
a little kid is trick or treating all by himself. He’s dressed as a pirate. He knocks on the door of an elderly woman. She opens the door and says
“Awww. A pirate! So cute, young man. But you are all by yourself. Where are your buccaneers?”
The kid replies, “Under my buccin’hat, lady. Now give me some candy!”
How about an old sea joke from Mark Twain.
A ship at sea is caught in a horrible storm and taking on water. The crew cries to the captain, “PRAY FOR US,CAPTAIN!”
Captain: “I AIN’T BEEN IN A CHURCH IN FORTY YEARS! I DON’T KNOW HOW TO PRAY!”
Crew: “ WELL DO SOMETHING RELIGIOUS!”
So he took up a collection.
A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says “You know you have a steering wheel down the front of your pants”
Pirate say “ARRRRRRRR...and it’s driving me nuts”
USE PIRATE VOICE
I can’t tell you. this is a family friendly forum and my best pirate joke is rated Arrrr!
And to think, it was actor ROBERT NEWTON who got everyone to talk like they think a pirate talks.
Now, what if Walter Brennan had us all talking like a pirate as he did in THE PRINCESS AND THE PIRATE, we would all be going around cackling like hens.
We were outside. My partner sees a 4 year old boy with a patch on one eye.
He growls at the kid and says..."Are you a pirate?".
The kid says....No, I jumped off the car and landed in the bushes and poked my eye".
Made our day...
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.