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Lazamataz Vows Celibacy
By Lazamataz
Posted on 04/01/2011 4:57:48 AM PDT by Lazamataz
Yes, everyone. You have heard me correctly. I have come to realize that casual sex with various women is sinful and wrong. It is lustful and lascivious, and I have decided that in my turn towards rightous living, that I must stop 'Hitting It'. 
Expect no more comments of 'I'd hit it'. Expect no more flirting with cute freeperettes. Expect no more comments about pretty women's pictures. 
Women have become more than sex objects to me. They are whole and wholesome Children of God, and I have come to the understanding that to treat them as amusement parks is degrading to both them and me.
TOPICS: Cheese, Moose, Sister; Chit/Chat; Health/Medicine; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: lazwouldnothitit; napl; narcissus; waitwhat
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To: Lazamataz
    I should hold out Hope for you? I misplaced her picture though, and I wouldn’t know how to put her onscreen. No, do not believe the change, Today is April 1.
 
41
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:16:47 AM PDT
by 
no-to-illegals
(Please God, Bless and Protect Our Men and Women in Uniform with Victory.  Amen.)
 
To: PzLdr
    My God! You CAN put lipstick on a pig!! Here, this one is prettier
 
 
To: Malone LaVeigh
    Not my type; besides, I’d only be willing to walk in a nice park with her on a sunny day.
 
43
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:17:37 AM PDT
by 
Lazamataz
(The Democrat Party is Communist. The Republican Party is Socialist. The Tea Party is Capitalist.)
 
To: Lazamataz
    I'm with ya, 
Just until I leave this world paradise of Afghanistan and get back to "She who will be obeyed" and then what ever we do, well that's between old folks who have been together for over 35 years
 which realistically is boring but comfortable.
44
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:18:57 AM PDT
by 
SERE_DOC
(My Rice Krispies told me to stay home & clean my weapons!)
 
To: Lazamataz
45
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:18:57 AM PDT
by 
from occupied ga
(Your most dangerous enemy is your own government,)
 
To: HangnJudge
    I think Laz is weakening.
46
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:19:01 AM PDT
by 
no-to-illegals
(Please God, Bless and Protect Our Men and Women in Uniform with Victory.  Amen.)
 
To: Lazamataz
    
 "In that case, gimmee all my Playboy pictures back, you louse."
 
47
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:19:06 AM PDT
by 
Liz
(A taxpayer voting for Obama is like a chicken voting for Col Sanders.)
 
To: Lazamataz
48
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:20:03 AM PDT
by 
mowowie
 
To: Lazamataz
49
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:20:27 AM PDT
by 
JoeProBono
(A closed mouth gathers no feet - Visualize)
 
To: Liz
    "In that case, gimmee all my Playboy pictures back, you louse."Not a problem; I deleted all my porn, too.
 
50
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:21:08 AM PDT
by 
Lazamataz
(The Democrat Party is Communist. The Republican Party is Socialist. The Tea Party is Capitalist.)
 
To: Lazamataz
    Wowo the first April's Fool thread of the day. It's ok the women will not mind!!1 ;-)
To: SERE_DOC
    Perhaps you will join me in my Vow of Celibacy.
 
52
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:23:25 AM PDT
by 
Lazamataz
(The Democrat Party is Communist. The Republican Party is Socialist. The Tea Party is Capitalist.)
 
To: Lazamataz
    We're witnessing the end of an era. Who will carry on?
 
53
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:24:05 AM PDT
by 
Daffynition
(DBKP ~ Death By 1000 Papercuts)
 
To: Lazamataz
    Has anybody informed Drudge yet about this turn of event?
 
54
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:24:33 AM PDT
by 
mowowie
 
To: Liz
    Geeez!
 What's up with those "eyebrows"?
Too much botox?
55
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:24:57 AM PDT
by 
Fiddlstix
(Warning! This Is A Subliminal Tagline! Read it at your own risk!(Presented by TagLines R US))
 
To: Lazamataz
     My Roswell, GA herd doesn't believe you!
My Roswell, GA herd doesn't believe you!
 
56
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:25:06 AM PDT
by 
nevergore
("It could be that the purpose of my life is simply to serve as a warning to others.")
 
To: Lazamataz
    
This is a leopard....

This is a leopard that has changed its spots.
 
57
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:25:16 AM PDT
by 
N. Theknow
(A gun in the hand, beats a cop on the phone.)
 
To: Lazamataz
    okay Admin. Moderator where did you put the real Laz?
58
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:25:21 AM PDT
by 
no-to-illegals
(Please God, Bless and Protect Our Men and Women in Uniform with Victory.  Amen.)
 
To: Lazamataz
    
 Last would not it that.
 
To: Lazamataz
    Hillary will miss the Jaeger Bombs with Laz...
 
60
posted on 
04/01/2011 5:27:07 AM PDT
by 
COBOL2Java
(Obama is the least qualified guy in whatever room he walks into.)
 
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