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Post some good jokes

Posted on 03/29/2009 7:41:27 PM PDT by A_cool_guy

I know some jokes, but I don't know any good political jokes!! Could everyone post some good jokes here?

Thanks,

A_cool_guy


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: comicrelief; freepun; humor; jokes; molassesmiasma; monkeyface; monkeyfacerules; penguinhumor; sionnsar; trolltimer; undeadthreadapril; zot; zotemifyougotem; zotthenewbie
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To: NicknamedBob

Waht to you mean “forced” to go out and enjoy this beautiful, breezy warm and gorgeous day, hm?


2,141 posted on 04/23/2009 5:54:43 AM PDT by Pippin
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To: Pippin

I never go anywhere - except Amsterdam in 2003 - I just get to hear about other people’s travels. Less stress for me!


2,142 posted on 04/23/2009 6:00:05 AM PDT by Tax-chick (O hai. Do I need you for something right now?)
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To: Pippin
Hehe... Spring rains really haven't even started here.

I have a "fun" shoot on Saturday. Supposed to be 52oF and raining.

Not sure how "fun" it's going to be, but it'll increase my chances of winning something off the prize table.

2,143 posted on 04/23/2009 6:07:20 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (1000110010101010100001001001111)
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To: NicknamedBob

I don’t think I’ve ever seen that movie. Which, for me, is odd.


2,144 posted on 04/23/2009 6:07:48 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (1000110010101010100001001001111)
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To: Dead Corpse; Darksheare

LOL!

Did you two collaborate on that? It sounds like a Bad Idea from a mad scientist.


2,145 posted on 04/23/2009 6:09:29 AM PDT by Monkey Face (Borrow money from a pessimist. They don't expect it back!)
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To: Tax-chick
OldTax-lady and her friends have been to Helsinki. They did a tour of “Northern European Capitals” a few years ago.

That would have been nice! I've been to Oslo and now Helsinki.

2,146 posted on 04/23/2009 6:10:21 AM PDT by sionnsar ((Iran Azadi | 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | "Also sprach Telethustra" - NonValueAdded)
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To: sionnsar

Their tour went to all of Scandinavia, somewhere in Germany, and St. Petersburg, Russia.


2,147 posted on 04/23/2009 6:12:27 AM PDT by Tax-chick (O hai. Do I need you for something right now?)
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To: Monkey Face; Darksheare

Er... No. Do you think we should?


2,148 posted on 04/23/2009 6:14:11 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (1000110010101010100001001001111)
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To: Dead Corpse; Darksheare

Well...ah...*ahem*
If you DID, I’m sure we wouldn’t be able to tell which one had what idea. Kinda like the Hildebrandt Brothers in Wonderland.

;o]


2,149 posted on 04/23/2009 6:36:28 AM PDT by Monkey Face (Borrow money from a pessimist. They don't expect it back!)
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To: Monkey Face; Dead Corpse

Hey.. that’s a good idea!
We can ‘detune’ a teleFRAG and use microphones, millimeter wave, and video system tracking to target the mosquito for explosive elimination.

Just think of it!
Matter to energy conversion destruction of annoying biting pests!


2,150 posted on 04/23/2009 7:19:34 AM PDT by Darksheare (Tar is cheap, and feathers are plentiful.)
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To: Darksheare; Dead Corpse; All

Get out the popcorn, folks! We gonna have some fireworks!!

Woo-hoo!


2,151 posted on 04/23/2009 7:22:55 AM PDT by Monkey Face (Borrow money from a pessimist. They don't expect it back!)
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Comment #2,152 Removed by Moderator

To: MHGinTN

ping


2,153 posted on 04/23/2009 7:33:36 AM PDT by NellieMae (Here...... common sense,common sense,common sense,where'd ya go... common sense......)
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To: Monkey Face

Good morning! I’m going to Wal-mart as soon as Bill finishes his math test. We don’t have enough bread to make sandwiches for everyone. Maybe I’ll get fried chicken.


2,154 posted on 04/23/2009 7:33:46 AM PDT by Tax-chick (O hai. Do I need you for something right now?)
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To: Darksheare

"I like the pretty lights..."
2,155 posted on 04/23/2009 7:36:24 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (III)
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To: Tax-chick

I’m just sitting here. I’m going to put Lucky into the cage with Janice the Valley Girl, in a while.

They’ve been side by side for a week, now, so I think it’s time they bunked together.

That sounds exciting, doesn’t it? It’s probably the high point of my day and I don’t even know it. ;o]


2,156 posted on 04/23/2009 7:38:54 AM PDT by Monkey Face (Borrow money from a pessimist. They don't expect it back!)
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To: Monkey Face; Dead Corpse

Of course, with the teleFRAG I’m not certain exactly why it does what it does.
Possibly it is a byproduct of particle twinning.
Or maybe when something is teleported, you are transmitting all possible states of matter for that object including antimatter.
Which would go a long way towards explaining the rather dirty particles coming from operating the beast.


2,157 posted on 04/23/2009 7:41:05 AM PDT by Darksheare (Tar is cheap, and feathers are plentiful.)
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To: Monkey Face

I hope they get along! Santana has been doing major demonstrations of hostility at Slash all morning, while Slash sits on his rock with his eyes half closed. It must be very frustrating to be so furious and have nobody care ;-).

I mailed off OldTax-lady’s investment papers. “Someday” some money may turn up for Anoreth’s savings account! She wants a motorcycle when she’s 21 ...


2,158 posted on 04/23/2009 7:42:42 AM PDT by Tax-chick (O hai. Do I need you for something right now?)
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To: Tax-chick; Monkey Face

Motorcycle?
Um.. tell her “Be extremely CAREFUL.”
Been in too many two wheel wipeouts myself to be comfortable with the thought of ladies wiping out in similar fashion.
Especially with my last one and my quote during it, “NOT the FACE!”

(Wrecks the frame, adds mileage, and can add scarring that would make certain tribes extremely jealous. Just ask my elbows and the underside of my chin. Of course, there’s newer safety gear these days...)


2,159 posted on 04/23/2009 7:48:51 AM PDT by Darksheare (Tar is cheap, and feathers are plentiful.)
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To: Darksheare; Monkey Face
Or maybe when something is teleported, you are transmitting all possible states of matter for that object including antimatter.

This. When you try and translocate, you shuffle the quanta through all possible states simultaneously. You try and resolve one of the resulting superimposed states, and ka-blammo.

2,160 posted on 04/23/2009 7:59:03 AM PDT by Dead Corpse (III)
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