MORFORD: Christian Virgins Are Overrated

San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 5/12/6 | Mark Morford

[SmithL]

Think sex and drugs destroy America? Try naive chastity. Oh, and "Purity Balls"

There are these things. These unholy events called "Purity Balls" and you should probably fall to your knees right this minute and thank a merciful and lubricious and happily polyamorous God that you do not know what they are and that you have access right this minute to vast quantities of wine to deflect their nasty karmic arrows because, you know, oh my God. But hey, free country.

Purity Balls. No, not some sort of newfangled spherical chastity device to be inserted using vacuum tubes and pulleys, but rather fancy creepy dress-up rituals taking place in towns like Colorado Springs and Tucson and Zoloft Jesusville, in which Christian dads rent a bad tux while their daughters, mostly teenagers but many as young as 6 or 7, get all dolled up in gowns from JCPenny and they all drive out to the airport Marriott and prepare to, well, lose their minds.

It begins. At some point the daughter stands up, her pale arms wrapped around her daddy, and reads aloud a formal pledge that she will remain forever pure and virginal and sex-free until she is handed over, by her dad (who is actually called the "high priest" of the home), like some sort of sad hymenic gift, to her husband, who will receive her like the sanitized and overprotected and libidinously inept servant she so very much is. Praise!

Would that I were making this up.

[SmithL]

Morfordite Alert

`nuff said

[Tax-chick]

I'm puzzled as to why this flamer cares whether young women are chaste or not.

[Red Badger]

How would HE know?..............

[golfisnr1]

He obviously does not share or care for christian values.

[LongsforReagan]

If there really are Purity Balls, even remotely like what Morford is suggesting, that is wacky.

[Gay State Conservative]

I've never heard of these things but I'm confused as to why the author finds them to be so abhorrent.

But then it occurred to me that these "balls" fly in the face of the left's First Commandment...

"If It Feels Good,Thou Shalt Do It"

[PzLdr]

As opposed to a San Fran "Fudgepacker Fandango"?

[Tax-chick]

Understatement award!

[texgal]

If there are events like this,in the way Mr. Morford describes, then it does sound kind of strange.

My daughter along with lots of others teens at our church walked up to the front of the sanctuary and vowed to remain sexually pure until she was married. The congregation said a prayer for them and they returned to their seats. The young man she married in January had done the same so they made sure they were never alone in compromising situations before they married. They courted, rather than dated. That meant having someone chaperone from time to time which was sometimes inconvenient for the moms, but we did what we could to help them, as good parents do.

Both say they are glad they waited for one another.

[Mrs. Darla Ruth Schwerin]

Boy, this fella sure has a gutter mouth...

[mlc9852]

From San Francisco? LOL

Why are they still part of the US anyway?

[mlc9852]

I taught my daughters that they would never regret waiting until marriage but mostly likely they would regret not waiting.

[359Henrie]

Those damm virgins spread aids, ya know.

[texgal]

I told my daughter that if he says "If you love me, you'll do it" meant he really didn't really love her, he only loved himself.

We're supposed to protect our children. Teenagers aren't emotionally mature enough to handle the heartbreak and everything else that accompanies a sexual non-committed relationship. For that matter, neither are most adults!

I don't apologize to anyone for encouraging my kids to wait until marriage.

[MortMan]

Actually, this is simply harnessing the power of positive peer pressure, as well as celebrating chastity. I fail to see anything wrong with it.

[Clemenza]

[mlc9852]

I totally agree with you.

[linda_22003]

"Purity Balls" - isn't that the painful condition that guys experience when girls won't sleep with them? :)

[Chewie84]

What a jerk. Who cares what he says? I'm a guy, a Christian, and I'm saving myself for marriage. I will continue to do so, in spite of what losers like Morford say.

[after dark]

I always wondered where my liberal relatives get their strange ideas about Christians from.

I have never seen anything like what this man described in any Christian church I have ever been in.

He is either lying ,or he was on a bad drug trip when he saw this event.