Woman bites into finger at San Jose restaurant (human digit in chili!)

San Francisco Chronicle ^ | 3/23/05 | Maria Alicia Gaura

[TFFKAMM]

A diner bit into a segment of human finger while digging into a bowl of chili at a San Jose Wendy's restaurant Tuesday night, Santa Clara County health officials said today.

The woman, who asked officials not to name or even describe her, spit out the well-cooked digit and reportedly warned other diners to stop eating. She then became sick to her stomach.

Santa Clara County Health Officer Dr. Martin Fenstersheib said today the woman was horrified "due to the unpleasant sensation of having this (object) in her mouth."

But he said the finger had been cooked at a high enough temperature to kill any viruses, including hepatitis or HIV, and it was unlikely that she will suffer any health effects from her experience, aside from psychological trauma.

The finger was described by Santa Clara County Medical Examiner Dr. Joseph P. O'Hara as cooked but not decomposed. The finger was found in two pieces, a one and three-eighths inch long fingertip complete with the skin whorls used in fingerprinting, and a half-inch long piece of fingernail. The joint appeared to have been torn off, possibly by manufacturing machinery, rather than cleanly cut. Because of its slightly longer than average length and neat grooming, it may have belonged to a woman, O'Hara said....

[Chad Fairbanks]

Mmmmmmm LadyFingers... Yum!

[506trooper]

Soylent Green!

[PAR35]

Rocky Horror Picture Show

Eating Raoul

I can't think of any other good cannibalism movies.

[506trooper]

Alive

Killer Klowns From Outer Space

Any of the Lector flicks

[contemplator]

I wondered what happened to those bodies Christopher ground up in Satriales (Sopranos)

[MoochPooch]

Now that's what I call giving someone the finger.

[nopardons]

Oh ICK and yes,quite like one of "Mrs. Lovett's meat pies".

Considering that you are now stuck in that play,this thread REALLY is right up your alley. LOL

[pharmamom]

Another good reason to be vegetarian.

[Happygal]

How about a little Priest? ;-)


TODD: (spoken) These are desperate times,
Mrs. Lovett, and desperate measures are called for!
LOVETT: Here we are, now! Hot out of the oven!
TODD: What is that?

LOVETT:
It's priest. Have a little priest.
TODD:
Is it really good?
LOVETT:
Sir, it's too good, at least!
Then again, they don't commit sins of the flesh,
So it's pretty fresh.
TODD:
Awful lot of fat.
LOVETT:
Only where it sat.
TODD:
Haven't you got poet, or something like that?
LOVETT:
No, y'see, the trouble with poet is
'Ow do you know it's deceased?
Try the priest!

TODD: (spoken) Heavenly!
Not as hearty as bishop, perhaps,
but then again, not as bland as curate, either!

LOVETT:
And good for business, too -- always leaves you wantin' more!
Trouble is, we only get it on Sundays!

Lawyer's rather nice.
TODD:
If it's for a price.
LOVETT:
Order something else, though, to follow,
Since no one should swallow it twice!
TODD:
Anything that's lean.
LOVETT:
Well, then, if you're British and loyal,
You might enjoy Royal Marine!
Anyway, it's clean.
Though of course, it tastes of wherever it's been!
TODD:
Is that squire,
On the fire?
LOVETT:
Mercy no, sir, look closer,
You'll notice it's grocer!
TODD:
Looks thicker,
More like vicar!
LOVETT:
No, it has to be grocer --
It's green!

TODD:
The history of the world, my love --
LOVETT:
Save a lot of graves,
Do a lot of relatives favors!
TODD:
Is those below serving those up above!
LOVETT:
Ev'rybody shaves,
So there should be plenty of flavors!
TODD:
How gratifying for once to know
BOTH:
That those above will serve those down below!

LOVETT: (spoken) Now let's see, here... We've got tinker.
TODD: Something... pinker.
LOVETT: Tailor?
TODD: Paler.
LOVETT: Butler?
TODD: Subtler.
LOVETT: Potter?
TODD: Hotter.
LOVETT: Locksmith?

Lovely bit of clerk.
TODD:
Maybe for a lark.
LOVETT:
Then again there's sweep
If you want it cheap
And you like it dark!
Try the financier,
Peak of his career!
TODD:
That looks pretty rank.
LOVETT:
Well, he drank,
It's a bank
Cashier.
Never really sold.
Maybe it was old.
TODD:
Have you any Beadle?
LOVETT:
Next week, so I'm told!
Beadle isn't bad till you smell it and
Notice 'ow well it's been greased...
Stick to priest!

(spoken) Now then, this might be a little bit stringy,
but then of course it's... fiddle player!
TODD: No, this isn't fiddle player -- it's piccolo player!
LOVETT: 'Ow can you tell?
TODD: It's piping hot!
LOVETT: Then blow on it first!

TODD:
The history of the world, my sweet --
LOVETT:
Oh, Mr. Todd,
Ooh, Mr. Todd,
What does it tell?
TODD:
Is who gets eaten, and who gets to eat!
LOVETT:
And, Mr. Todd,
Too, Mr. Todd,
Who gets to sell!
TODD:
But fortunately, it's also clear
BOTH:
That [L: But] ev'rybody goes down well with beer!

LOVETT: (spoken)
Since marine doesn't appeal to you, 'ow about... rear admiral?
TODD: Too salty. I prefer general.
LOVETT: With, or without his privates? "With" is extra.

TODD: What is that?
LOVETT:
It's fop.
Finest in the shop.
And we have some shepherd's pie peppered
With actual shepherd on top!
And I've just begun --
Here's the politician, so oily
It's served with a doily,
Have one!
TODD:
Put it on a bun.
Well, you never know if it's going to run!
LOVETT:
Try the friar,
Fried, it's drier!
TODD:
No, the clergy is really
Too coarse and too mealy!
LOVETT:
Then actor,
That's compacter!
TODD:
Yes, and always arrives overdone!
I'll come again when you have JUDGE on the menu!

LOVETT: (spoken) Wait! True, we don't have judge yet,
but we've got something you might fancy even better.
TODD: What's that?
LOVETT: Executioner!

TODD:
Have charity towards the world, my pet!
LOVETT:
Yes, yes, I know, my love!
TODD:
We'll take the customers that we can get!
LOVETT:
High-born and low, my love!
TODD:
We'll not discriminate great from small!
No, we'll serve anyone,
Meaning anyone,
BOTH:
And to anyone
At all!

[rdl6989]

Yuk.

[rdl6989]

Oops, above is supposed to be Clara Peller.

[groanup]

First you get the finger then you get to sue. What a country.

[null and void]

I've eaten there many times. They've never given me the finger...

[freedumb2003]

Reminds me of that scene in Naked Gun 33-1/3 where Ricardo Montabaln bites into the hot dog that is a finger with a ring still on.

[nopardons]

VERY clever words,almost Gilbertian,but lousy music.

Thanks for posting all of that, I had quite forgotten how clever "SWEENY TODD" was.

[Happygal]

Yes. And I'm coming round to the music too.

Dare I say it...I'm being Sondheim-ified.

Green Finch and Linnet Bird is a haunting melody. And despite the atonality in parts...it suits the play. There is some amazing counterpoint too, that I had to recondition my melodic ear too.

I would LOVE it if you were here to see our show. I'll send you the DVD of it when its over. BUT nopardons, you gotta promise me that you will watch it, start to finish!

[nopardons]

I could NEVER really get into Sondheim's later music; though you're right, the atonality fits "SWEENY TODD". What he did to "Edwin Drood", though, was enough to make this Dickens fanatic want to leave the theatre after Act 1. I didn't,but my husband and I were NOT happy at all. :-(

I'd LOVE a DVD of your production and swear in blood, that I'll watch it from beginning to end!

[TFFKAMM]

Courtesy of Monty Python:

Cut to an undertaker's shop

Undertaker	Morning.
Man	Good Morning.
Undertaker	What can I do for you, squire?
Man	Um, well, I wonder if you can help me. You see, my mother has just died.
Undertaker	Ah well, we can help you. We deal with stiffs.
Man	What?
Undertaker	Well, there's three things we can do with your mum. We can bury her, burn her, or dump her.
Man	Dump her?
Undertaker	Dump her in the Thames.
Man	What?
Undertaker	Oh, did you like her?
Man	Yes!
Undertaker	Oh well, we won't dump her, then. Well, what do you think? We can bury her or burn her.
Man	Well, which do you recommend?
Undertaker	Well, they're both nasty. If we burn her, she gets stuffed in the flames, crackle, crackle, crackle, which is a bit of a shock if she's not quite dead, but quick. (the audience starts booing) and then we give you handful of ashes, which you can pretend are hers.
Man	Oh.
Undertaker	Or, if we bury her she gets eaten up lots of weevils, and nasty maggots, (the booing increases) which as I said before is a bit of a shock if she's not quite dead.
Man	I see. Well, she's definitely dead.
Undertaker	Where is she?
Man	She's in this sack.
Undertaker	Can I have a look? She looks quite young.
Man	Yes, yes, she was.
	Increasing protests from audience
Undertaker	(calling) Fred!
Fred's voice	Yeah?
Undertaker	I think we've got an eater.
Man	What?
	Another undertaker pokes his head round the door
Fred	Right, I'll get the oven on. (goes off)
Man	Er, excuse me, um, are you suggesting eating my mother?
Undertaker	Er ... Yeah. Not raw. Cooked.
Man	What?
Undertaker	Yes, roasted with a few french fries, broccoli, horseradish sauce ...
Man	Well, I do feel a bit peckish.
Voice From Audience	Disgraceful! Boo! (etc.)
Undertaker	Great!
Man	Can we have some parsnips?
Undertaker	(calling) Fred - get some parsnips.
Man	I really don't think I should.
Undertaker	Look, tell you what, we'll eat her, if you feel a bit guilty about it after, we can dig a grave and you can throw up in it.

[Happygal]

Ok, yer on. I'll send you the DVD when it's done. Bad or good..you'll see us warts and all. *L*

I promise you a copy. :-)

[nopardons]

FANTATSIC ! :-)

I'd rather have one of the G&S shows, but I do want to see this production since we've talked so much about it. LOL