Bush announces capture of Ronstadt

Las Vegas Mercury ^ | 7/29/04

[welstead]

http://www.lasvegasmercury.com/2004/MERC-Jul-29-Thu- 2004/24375032.html

Thursday, July 29, 2004

Copyright © Las Vegas Mercury

Mercury World Report

Bush announces capture of Ronstadt

WASHINGTON--In a televised address Saturday, a visibly jubilant President Bush announced the capture of Linda Ronstadt, marking an end to an "era of terror that held freedom-loving Americans in its icy grip."

After an intense, four-day search, the entertainer was discovered in a "spider hole" in northern Massachusetts, disoriented, unkempt and armed only with a small radio tuned to NPR.

"The capture of this fugitive from justice is crucial to a free America," Bush said. "And now we need fear no longer the rule of this heartless terrorist whose every word is a tiny dirty bomb blowing up a little part of our nation's hard-won liberties.

"Already there is rejoicing. Look around and see freedom blossoming around you. Women can now vote. Children have a future. And statues of Ronstadt--once dominating every public square--topple as quickly as her reign."

He added that filmmaker Michael Moore is still at large, believed to be in the "fast food belt" on the Michigan- Indiana border.

[Old Sarge]

PING, but Check Fire: this is actually funny!

Welcome to Free Republic, Welstead!

[King Prout]

IIRC, something like this was posted late last week

it is funny, though.

[Zavien Doombringer]

you pinged?

[Dog Gone]

LOL

[Chode]

what'd they do... use a bleeding baby calf staked out as bait???

[OSHA]

Funny but coming from a newbie it could be intended and interpreted as a slam.

[Zavien Doombringer]

And, to add, he hasn't posted on any forum...

[OSHA]

Sorry to be suspicious, but you might want to do some answering here.

[kenth]

Michael Moore is still at large, believed to be in the "fast food belt" on the Michigan- Indiana border.

LOL... fast food belt

[freedomson]

ZOT! Comin' down!

[OSHA]

Don't just sit there with a dumb look on your face.

[Conspiracy Guy]

John Kerry

Sung to Tom Dooley



Hang down your head John Kerry,
Hang down your head and cry.
Hang down your head John Kerry,
We know you’re bound to lie.



You’ve lied about your service,
Over in Viet Nam.
You twist your senate record,
We know that you’re a scam.



Hang down your head John Kerry,
Hang down your head and cry.
Hang down your head John Kerry,
We know you’re bound to lie.



You said that you did war crimes,
Now you say you’re the man.
That has the right to lead us,
I do not think you can.



Hang down your head John Kerry,
Hang down your head and cry.
Hang down your head John Kerry,
We know you’re bound to lie.



You’ve voted yes Iraq War,
Then turned and you voted no.
Just what now do you stand for,
We’d really like to know.



Hang down your head John Kerry,
Hang down your head and cry.
Got no bounce in July,
We know you’re bound to lie.

Conspiracy Guy aka DIF 8/6/2004

[Slings and Arrows]

[Zavien Doombringer]

[Slings and Arrows]

Nice to know my art was successful.

[Zavien Doombringer]

My eyes!!!! My eyes are still burning!!!

[MeekOneGOP]

hehe!

Welcome to FreeRepublic.com, Welstead.

---

After an intense, four-day search, the entertainer was discovered in a "spider hole" ....

WARNING. Reading the following comment may cause spewing of liquids on to keyboard and monitor. Please swallow before continuing. No animals were injured in the making of this post. Any similarity to reality is purely coincidental. Any factual statement is not the intent of the poster. Views expressed by the poster are not necessarily shared by the poster. Price is for 24 month lease with $2500 down. Your mileage may vary. Objects are closer than they appear. No shirt, no shoes, no service. You must be at least this tall to ride. Do not remove under penalty of law. Remain seated until the ride comes to a full and complete stop. Reading this post may cause low birth weight. Not recommended for viewers with heart conditions, back or neck injuries, breathing difficulties, recent surgery or illness, high blood pressure and carpal tunnel syndrome.
[Disclaimer courtesy of Conspiracy Guy]

[flowerjoyfun]