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Starbucks Workers To Begin Placing Yellow Star Sticker On Jewish Customers' Cups
Babylon Bee ^ | 11/13/2023 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 11/13/2023 2:26:08 PM PST by DFG

SEATTLE, WA — In an effort to smooth things over with the Jewish community after baristas voiced support for Hamas, coffee giant Starbucks has begun to give Jewish customers a little something extra by placing a yellow star sticker on their coffee cups.

"We value our Jewish customers and want everyone to know exactly who they are," said Starbucks spokesperson Dan Spivey. "We don't want any of our customers to feel alienated or discriminated against, so we're placing these yellow stars on the cups of our Jewish customers to make sure they are fully recognized."

Jewish groups had called for a boycott of Starbucks after the union that represents many baristas made posts on social media expressing solidarity with Palestinians in the days following attacks on Jewish civilians by the terrorist organization Hamas. Starbucks was quick to distance itself from the union. "We would never want to be a part of anything that divisive," Spivey said. "Starbucks has long prided itself in being completely apolitical. We have never given in to radical progressive causes or anything like that before."

Spivey said the company hopes placing identifying yellow stars on the cups of Jewish customers will lead to positive things. "If you see someone out there with a Starbucks cup that has a yellow star on it — say something polite, like ‘Hello, Jew!'" he said. "They'll definitely feel loved."

At publishing time, Starbucks was also reportedly planning to tattoo serial numbers on the arms of Jewish customers in lieu of providing them with a Starbucks Rewards card.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; barista; hamas; humor; jews; satire; starbucks; starsucks; thebee; yellowstar
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To: Seruzawa

Damn the Bee, so close to the truth almost every time.....


21 posted on 11/13/2023 3:59:56 PM PST by Lockbox (politicians, they all seemed like game show hosts to me.... Sting…)
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To: Secret Agent Man

Even buying a case of Kcups that I do not reuse, it comes out to 21 cents a cup. (creamer a tad extra)

The coffee tastes 100 times better than StarBucks. I do not understand why people drink their garbage.


22 posted on 11/13/2023 4:21:34 PM PST by madison10 (He watching over Israel slumbers not, nor sleeps.)
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To: DFG

Maaaannn…I saw the headline and thought “This had better be the Bee.” Phew! 😅


23 posted on 11/13/2023 4:23:07 PM PST by Allegra (Stop the Zeepers from Censoring FReepers)
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To: DFG
"...we're placing these yellow stars on the cups of our Jewish customers to make sure they are fully recognized.".....


24 posted on 11/13/2023 4:31:12 PM PST by LibFreeUSA
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To: CatOwner

Yup.


25 posted on 11/13/2023 4:31:50 PM PST by RoosterRedux (A person who seeks the truth with a strong bias will never find it. He will only confirm his bias.)
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To: DFG

The Baristas and the Hammies. I’ll betcha that would make a weird TV sitcom.


26 posted on 11/13/2023 4:39:28 PM PST by FlingWingFlyer ('Build Back Better' is a Bidenskyyyyyyism for 'we gotta get rid of all dem white peoples'.)
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To: DFG

History repeats itself.


27 posted on 11/13/2023 4:55:11 PM PST by Mark (DONATE ONCE every 3 months-is that a big deal?)
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To: Gaffer

They got me until I got to tattooing numbers on arms. Then I check for the Bee.


28 posted on 11/13/2023 5:56:55 PM PST by citizen (Put all LBQTwhatever programming on a new subscription service: PERV-TV)
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To: DFG

Never been to a star bucks...and could care the F less.


29 posted on 11/13/2023 5:58:51 PM PST by Osage Orange (I miss Rush)
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To: DFG

I read it and found it believable before realizing it’s from the Bee. I mean the Nazi’s put stars on Jews, why shouldn’t Starbucks? It’s only logical.

The Bee hits too close to being real some of the times.


30 posted on 11/13/2023 6:03:58 PM PST by redfreedom (Joseph Stalin: "It does not mater how anyone votes, how votes are counted is what matters.")
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To: DFG

Brilliant satire!


31 posted on 11/13/2023 6:05:29 PM PST by HereInTheHeartland (Have you seen Joe Biden's picture on a milk carton?)
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To: scrabblehack

Not funny
Ignorant and inappropriate
But not funny


32 posted on 11/13/2023 6:09:09 PM PST by Palio di Siena (P01135809)
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To: TNoldman; Chode; SkyDancer; Salamander; Carriage Hill; Lockbox; MtnClimber; nascarnation; ...
IMG-7006

I'll bump that puny yellow urine star up to a Gold Dot !


33 posted on 11/13/2023 7:12:37 PM PST by mabarker1 ( (Congress- the opposite of PROGRESS!!! A fraud, a hypocrite, a liar. I'm a member of Congress!!!)
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To: Mark

Because nobody TEACHES REAL HISTORY ANYMORE !!!


34 posted on 11/13/2023 7:15:49 PM PST by mabarker1 ( (Congress- the opposite of PROGRESS!!! A fraud, a hypocrite, a liar. I'm a member of Congress!!!)
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To: Lockbox

The Bee is getting away from the ridiculous and closer to the truth. I would not put it past for star big bucks to actually to this.


35 posted on 11/13/2023 7:18:46 PM PST by Texas resident (Biden=Obama=Jarrett=Soros)
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To: mabarker1

i’m still running per-production Hydra-Shoks...


36 posted on 11/13/2023 8:39:38 PM PST by Chode (there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
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To: mabarker1

Is this to ID them like in Nazi Germany?


37 posted on 11/14/2023 6:42:22 AM PST by SkyDancer (~Definition Of A Business Jet: A Mailing Tube For Executives ~)
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To: SkyDancer

starducks star crap, Yes

Gold Dots are to mark the starducks group!!!


38 posted on 11/14/2023 4:29:20 PM PST by mabarker1 ( (Congress- the opposite of PROGRESS!!! A fraud, a hypocrite, a liar. I'm a member of Congress!!!)
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