Welcome Friends, foes and associates to the completely remodeled Free Republic...
Smoker's Lounge
Posted on 05/03/2002 9:57:12 AM PDT by Just another Joe
Welcome Friends, foes and associates to the completely remodeled Free Republic...
Smoker's Lounge
Here you will find a comfy place to smoke, drink, joke or whatever. We always have a great time, so sit back, relax and...
Arthur Davidson of the Harley-Davidson Motorcycle Company died and went to heaven. Upon his arrival at the Pearly Gates St.Peter greeted him and said, "Since you've been so instrumental in influencing the world of motorcyles and your products have been so world changing you may hang out with anyone you choose in heaven."
Arthur thought for a moment and responded, "I would like to meet God." St.Peter led Arthur to the throne and introduced him to God. Arthur asked God, "Say aren't you the great inventor of the woman?" God responded with a mighty voice, "Why, Yes I am." "Well," Arthur said, "inventor to inventor, I would like to discuss with you some major design flaws I noted with your invention. First off there's too much inconsistency in the front end, it chatters constantly at high speed, the rear end is too soft and wobbles way too much, the intake is too close to the exhaust, and finally the maintenance costs are way too high in fact they're outrageous."
"Well those are all fine points," God noted, "but according to my calculations there are more men riding my invention than yours!"
Dubya is presently locked in the detention room, please leave your message after the sound of the whip.
(CRAAAACCCKK)
(/answering machine voice)
You be one wicked woman!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and I be outta here - go a hubby who is looking for real, as opposed to cyber, alcoholic beverages and we are headed out - while we can still have a smoke with our beers in Delaware.
See you all later!!!
Tanks!!!!Would you agree this is the best SL in quite a while?....It's spring time in the rockies for me...everybody is waking up!
FMCDH
I don't know. We had a pretty good one either last week or the week before.
We had about 350 replys in 4 1/2 or 5 hours.
That's cause I was here, dude... Bwahaha...
Well I think I was...
I think that was the day you came back from the dentist.
Well, there you go again...TEQUILA!@!!..THE drink of the new millenium!...(get used to it, the borders are coming down soon on the south....)
FMCDH
A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In the first room she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out "green side up!"
In the second room she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow. He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled "green side up!" The lady was somewhat curious but she said nothing.
In the third room she said she would like it painted a warm rose color. The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled "green side up!"
The lady then asked him, "Why do you keep yelling 'green side up'? I've told you blue yellow, and rose."
"I'm sorry," came the reply. "But I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street.
As long as it's Mezcal with the worm.
The difference between Republicans & Democrats
A Republican and a Democrat were walking down the street when they came to a homeless person.
The republican gave the homeless person his business card and told him come to his business for a job. He then took twenty dollars out of his pocket and gave it to the homeless person.
The Democrat was very impressed, and when they came to another homeless person, He decided to help. He walked over to the homeless person and gave him directions to the welfare office. He then reached into the Republicans pocket and gave him fifty dollars.
President Bush urged Congress Tuesday to cut back on their spending projects to prevent a return to runaway federal deficits. Right now the lawmakers are way over budget. Congress is living proof that you can't trust a dog to watch your food.
Arrrggghhhh!!!...Had the Top shelf overpriced crap, and the bottom shelf stuff sent me to the bottom...(hey, do you have my lampshade from 10/31/00 ???)
FMCDH!
A man walks into a bar one day and asks, "Does anyone here own that rottweiler outside?"
"Yeah, I do!" a biker says, standing up. "What about it?"
"Well, I think my chihuahua just killed him..."
"What are you talkin' about?!" the biker says, disbelievingly. "How couldyour little runt kill my rottweiler?"
"Well, it seems he got stuck in your dog's throat!"
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.