Aggressiveness is a virtue not a vice in this matter!
Posted on 11/04/2024 4:04:49 PM PST by dynachrome
Following the public outcry about the state's Department of Environmental Conservation raiding a local man's home and euthanizing his pet squirrel who had hundreds of thousands of social media followers, New York authorities announced Peanut the squirrel had died of COVID-19.
Officials revealed Peanut's cause of death in an effort to calm the backlash that resulted from what many people have labeled a blatant example of government overreach and misaligned priorities.
"We're saddened to announce that COVID-19 has claimed yet another victim," Governor Kathy Hochul told reporters. "An autopsy conducted yesterday revealed Peanut's caretakers had evidently failed to administer the latest vaccine booster, making it all but a guarantee that Peanut would die from COVID, as all living creatures do."
A source within the DEC corroborated the report and placed the blame squarely on the shoulders of Donald Trump's MAGA supporters. "It's a shame to see such needless loss of life," the insider said. "If Peanut had been taking the proper precautions — staying up-to-date on boosters, wearing his tiny mask, practicing social distancing from other squirrels — this would not have happened.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
If Peanuts could have spoken, he would have told those bureaucratic stormtroopers: If you strike me down, I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine. H/T Obi Wan Kenobi.
Aggressiveness is a virtue not a vice in this matter!
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