Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Little-Known Judge Tedina Cruzette Throws Hat In Ring For Trump's SCOTUS Consideration (humor)
babylonbee.com ^ | 9/22/2020 | staff

Posted on 09/28/2020 10:12:13 AM PDT by bitt

Since Trump has vowed to nominate a woman to the Supreme Court, his shortlist of candidates has been reduced to just a few highly female judges. Signs were initially pointing to Amy Coney Barrett, but a new candidate has emerged from the shadows as a front-runner for the coveted nomination: Tedina Cruzette.

"I had never heard of this Tedina before," said Trump. "But she is very, very female, which is important, so important. She doesn't have much of a judicial track record, but she seems like a really smart cookie. Loves America. Loves our veterans and law enforcement. And she's not bad-looking either! I know I can't say that but some people are saying it, you know. Not bad-looking!" Trump then made the "curve" gesture with his hands.

Miss Cruzette is a Cuban-American legal expert from Texas. She is reportedly well-known by her peers as a real actual female and also an expert in all kinds of law stuff, as well as a totally huge fan of the Constitution. "Oh, I just adore the Constitution," said Cruzette before coughing loudly and clearing her throat. "Oops! I'm sorry my voice sounds a little funny. I've been a little under the weather, darling. I simply can't wait to accept Mr. Trump's fancy nomination and do all kinds of lovely things for America!"

Critics are concerned by Cruzette's thin judicial record and some have reported being a little freaked out that she walks around awkwardly with what appears to be a MyPillow stuffed in her dress.

"Oh that ain't no pillow, that's just me darling!" Cruzette said with a flirty grin to reporters yesterday. The interview was cut short, however, when Joe Biden attempted to sneak up behind her and sniff her hair.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; scotus; tedcruz; tedinacruzette; texas

1 posted on 09/28/2020 10:12:13 AM PDT by bitt
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: Whenifhow; null and void; aragorn; EnigmaticAnomaly; kalee; Kale; AZ .44 MAG; Baynative; bgill; ...

2 posted on 09/28/2020 10:13:12 AM PDT by bitt (new q posts)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: bitt

The Bee is normally hilarious but this one was a miss.


3 posted on 09/28/2020 10:14:26 AM PDT by House Atreides
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: bitt

The Bee falling flat today...


4 posted on 09/28/2020 10:16:03 AM PDT by Magnum44 (My comprehensive terrorism plan: Hunt them down and kill them.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Magnum44

Much like the Drudge Report, the Babylon Bee is no longer run by the same people. Not the 180 change of the Drudge Report, but still it’s a change to people who don’t really get it.


5 posted on 09/28/2020 10:25:47 AM PDT by bhive
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: bitt

That Tedina is one good looking womern.;-)


6 posted on 09/28/2020 10:28:56 AM PDT by RoosterRedux
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: bitt

Attorney General Ted Cruz should be considered.


7 posted on 09/28/2020 10:39:07 AM PDT by Right Brigade
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: bitt

I had a hearty laugh the other day, seeing Ted himself posting a link to this on his Twitter.


8 posted on 09/28/2020 10:43:30 AM PDT by C210N
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: bitt

I laughed....The Bee stings again.


9 posted on 09/28/2020 10:51:39 AM PDT by Sacajaweau
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: bitt

I wonder where Tedina gets her hair done? Nanzi could use the name of a good hair stylist with that mop of hers.

10 posted on 09/28/2020 11:58:36 AM PDT by Liz ( Our side has 8 trillion bullets; the other side doesn't know which bathroom to use.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: C210N; bitt

First time I’ve seen it

Hilarious!!

Thanks for posting :)


11 posted on 09/28/2020 12:34:55 PM PDT by redinIllinois (Pro-life, accountant, gun-totin' Grandma - multi issue voter)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: bitt

I know it’s early in the new day, bitt...but ROFLMAO! The Bee Sting.

Face - Words - Deeds.

The SUBHUMAN PSYCHOPATHS won’t get it. The B knows. Gotta B one of their best ever. GR8. Laugh-of-the-day BUMP!

Forward this one to every PSYCHOPATH. They’ll want to shut down the B. CoVid - 19 84? Let’s see where’s my B-12, D-3 and other vitamins. Which ones did you say that you take, PSYCHOPATH Fauxi? Was it Zinc? From A to Z. The alpha to omega. Or is that the fraternities and sororities these PSYCHOPATHS come from? I dunno...I forget...I’m getting old too JoeJoe. C’mon man.


12 posted on 09/28/2020 9:17:18 PM PDT by PGalt
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

When are Teddy Bear and Orange Cheeto-face man bad gonna pass out some more bears at the border? Or, will they just toss them over the wall?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gU86F44tqDE

Put the cherries back in the bowl, Ted. Put the cheetos back in the bag, Glenn.


13 posted on 09/28/2020 9:26:15 PM PDT by PGalt
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 12 | View Replies]

To: bitt; Lazamataz

GUILTY !


14 posted on 09/29/2020 2:41:55 AM PDT by Candor7 ((Obama Fascism:http://www.americanthinker.com/2009/05/barack_obama_the_quintessentia_1.html))
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: House Atreides; Magnum44

I agree, this was a miss. Ted Cruz specifically turned down the role, and good sarcasm is based on truth.


15 posted on 09/29/2020 3:52:35 AM PDT by Lazamataz (The NYT commits acts of violence with their words.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson