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My health condition update (Vanity)
me ^ | 7/18/2016 | eastforker

Posted on 07/18/2016 10:26:20 AM PDT by eastforker

I am sorry I have not been very responsive to your Emails lately. I have been somewhat under the weather. My doctors have diagnosed me as having an acute case of Post Islamic Stress Trauma with Apologetic White House Fatigue, PIST-AWF (Pronounced pissed-off.)

PIST-AWF is a newly defined disease that has become widespread and highly contagious. Doctors at the CDC released a statement disclosing PIST-AWF as a new disease. It has already infected over half of the United States and is anticipated to continue to spread. The disease itself affects the cells of a person's entire body then goes dormant. The disease ravages the body and leaves serious side effects including, embarrassment for your country, depression, anxiety as to when it will come to an end and wondering how much more damage he can do and how long it will take to repair the damage, once a new person takes over the presidency.

Symptoms include: * Severe pain of the scalp from pulling your own hair while viewing your president pander to Muslim terrorists. * Uncontrollable heartburn at 8:00 PM during the O'Reilly factor. * Stomach cramps from swallowing the fact we elected Obama twice. * Vomiting from viewing terrorists murdering innocent people routinely on the nightly news. * Bleeding from the eyes. This is not Ebola. It is your eyes reacting to accidentally flipping to a channel that shows Al Sharpton as a so-called legitimate news show host. * Since the disease consumes the entire body, every infected person is then identified as the disease itself.

If you have these symptoms and consider yourself PIST-AWF, please notify your local election board and place your name on the list for a cure. It is expected, and sincerely hoped, that the cure will be available in November of 2016, but will not have a marked effect until January, 2017.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor; Miscellaneous
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Is anyone else PIST-AWF!!
1 posted on 07/18/2016 10:26:20 AM PDT by eastforker
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To: eastforker

Brilliant!


2 posted on 07/18/2016 10:28:09 AM PDT by BenLurkin (The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
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To: eastforker

I hear help and a cure is on the way!


3 posted on 07/18/2016 10:28:17 AM PDT by eastforker (The only time you can be satisfied is when your all Trump.)
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To: eastforker

Brilliant!


4 posted on 07/18/2016 10:29:16 AM PDT by Dinah Lord
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To: eastforker

Help is arriving, via THE train.


5 posted on 07/18/2016 10:30:29 AM PDT by LuvFreeRepublic
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To: eastforker

TrumPence cure is on the way.


6 posted on 07/18/2016 10:30:56 AM PDT by hoosiermama (Trump card is exposing the Fifth Column in the US)
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To: eastforker

I think that it is spreading to Europe, too.


7 posted on 07/18/2016 10:32:07 AM PDT by Blood of Tyrants (Socialism is always just one or a thousand or a million more murders away from utopia.)
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To: eastforker

Love it


8 posted on 07/18/2016 10:34:52 AM PDT by CGASMIA68
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To: eastforker
"The reports of my death are greatly exaggerated"

Mark Twain

9 posted on 07/18/2016 10:37:17 AM PDT by SkyDancer ("They Say That Nobody's Perfect But Yet Here I Am")
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To: eastforker

Greatness!!


10 posted on 07/18/2016 10:39:06 AM PDT by DallasGal (Hockey Pre-Season is 3 months away!!!!)
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To: eastforker

Trumpdasone 2016mg

Use daily as needed.

May cause return to law and order.

Avoid using in conjunction with CNNMBSBCABCNBCCBS

Reauthorization required Nov. 2020


11 posted on 07/18/2016 10:39:47 AM PDT by digger48
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To: eastforker

bump for PIST-AWF!


12 posted on 07/18/2016 10:43:10 AM PDT by right way right (May we remain sober over mere men, for God really is our one and only true hope.)
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To: digger48; eastforker

I’m so sorry to hear about your illness, especially since I am also a sufferer of the same condition.

I think that trying a 4-year course of digger48’s prescription will help everyone so afflicted. If not, then I cannot promise a positive outcome.


13 posted on 07/18/2016 11:01:32 AM PDT by SelmaLee (Will crawl over broken, burning glass - to vote for TRUMP.)
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To: eastforker

ROTFLOL


14 posted on 07/18/2016 11:04:23 AM PDT by little jeremiah (Half the truth is often a great lie. B. Franklin)
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To: eastforker

I have many of these symptoms. Checking, but it appears ObamaCare has only two possible treatments. There is the pink “granny” pill, Tymzup-Pheruchump, or there is the Wait and See Treatment, which may involve radiation depending on if you fall under the “coverage” of the next attack.


15 posted on 07/18/2016 11:06:27 AM PDT by Yaelle (Sorry, Mr. Franklin. We've been extremely careless with our Republic.)
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To: eastforker

*applause**applause**applause!


16 posted on 07/18/2016 11:29:20 AM PDT by workerbee
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To: digger48

This is such a great post and your reply is perfect!


17 posted on 07/18/2016 11:45:42 AM PDT by GizzyGirl
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To: eastforker
It's contagious!!
18 posted on 07/18/2016 11:48:41 AM PDT by Mark (Obama Care is now DEMOCRAT CARE)
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To: eastforker

I am definitely, unequivocally PIST-AWF!!
Great post by the way! :)


19 posted on 07/18/2016 11:50:22 AM PDT by GizzyGirl
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To: eastforker

Try a distilled water and fair trade coffee enema. Remove all that impacted Odunga.


20 posted on 07/18/2016 11:52:34 AM PDT by Stentor (Free the Rosenbergs--Oh wait. Nevermind.)
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