Post some good jokes

[A_cool_guy]

I know some jokes, but I don't know any good political jokes!! Could everyone post some good jokes here?

Thanks,

A_cool_guy

[Monkey Face]

In SLC, it’s usually rainy on Conference Weekend. Sometimes, it coincides with Easter, and then everyone says, “See?”

Somehow, the Easter Egg Hunts are always blessed with good weather!

[sionnsar]

Not sure of the temps this afternoon, but am guessing the upper 70s. All of a sudden it's spring.

Our meetings ran past midnight last night -- coupled with getting up at 5:30 for a 6 AM teleconference and maybe 3 hours sleep all told, I'm dragging. It was cold on the beachhouse deck too, but noplace I could talk inside because everyone else was asleep. Still, I got a nice view of Mt. Olympus rising into the sun during the teleconf. *\;-)

[Tax-chick]

The girls are supposed to go to an Easter egg hunt on Saturday with a neighbor. Forecast isn’t out yet. I figure we’ll bundle up in our winter clothes for church!

[Monkey Face]

I can’t seem to adjust to DST.
:o[

[Monkey Face]

KEWL! I love Easter egg hunts!

[sionnsar]

A little annoyed at my newest committee today. Because its subject material falls within the purview of two existing committees (one of which I am a member) a "joint working group" of the two was formed. I got corporate permission, though not blessing, to join.

But the first meeting will be just one day in June in Geneva (International Standards Organization HQ). VERY unlikely I'll get permission for that and maybe as well -- all that trouble traveling for one day isn't worth it.

I have to make some kind of request, but not sure this afternoon how to frame it. Tomorrow is easily soon enough.

[sionnsar]

I can’t seem to adjust to DST. :o[

I am TRULY sorrow to hear that.

[sionnsar]

Anoreth passed her medical check! Later in the week, she’ll go to the recruiters’ office and set an enrollment date.

Congratulations!

[sionnsar]

The girls are supposed to go to an Easter egg hunt on Saturday with a neighbor. Forecast isn’t out yet. I figure we’ll bundle up in our winter clothes for church!

A hint: eggs coloured anything other than white are easier to find in the snow.

[Pippin]

D'uh!

Ya think!

[sionnsar]

Ya got a Scot exercising our famed analytical abilities on the instant situation. *\;-)

(Not sure what we do in response except to design coloured-egg factories. Dae ye thinkit there wauld be ai mairket fuir coloured haggis-eggs?)

[NicknamedBob]

"Tomorrow is easily soon enough."

.

Well? Where's the rest of the poem?

[Monkey Face]

Haggis lays eggs????

[fanfan]

Anoreth passed her medical check! Later in the week, she’ll go to the recruiters’ office and set an enrollment date.

Congrats!

[thefactor]

an irish guy is leaving his house for work in the morning. his wife says, "if you go to the bar after work tonight you're dead!"

he says, "i'll be straight home, my dear."

of course he goes to the bar after work and gets hammered. so hammered he throws up on his shirt as he's walking home. he walks into his house and his wife blows up at him.

"you have puke on your shirt! you're drunk! i told you not to go to the bar after work you son of a..!" she screams.

"i didn't!" he says. "i was walking right home and this drunk guy came over to me and puked on my shirt. and he gave me $5 to go have my shirt cleaned. look in my shirt pocket and you'll see."

so she reaches into his shirt pocket and pulls out a $10 bill.

"if he gave you a $5 to have your shirt cleaned, then why is there a $10 bill in your pocket?" she asks.

"well," he says, "he also took a crap in my pants."

[Monkey Face]

*ohno*

[fanfan]

(Not sure what we do in response except to design coloured-egg factories......

The Ukrainians already solved the problem.

[Monkey Face]

I have several screensavers of Ukranian eggs. I love them!
They are not easy to make, but I would love to try my hand at the process.

[Monkey Face]

Head’s up at your email addy!

[Recovering Ex-hippie]

Fantastic.