****The Official Friday Silliness Thread****

[Lucky9teen]

It's

Being from Arizona, I have to pass these along (they can apply to other "hot" states as well)...

It's so hot in Arizona that...

• the birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
• the potatoes cook underground, and all you have to do to have lunch is to pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.
• farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs.
• the cows are giving evaporated milk.
• the trees are whistling for the dogs.
• you no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water.
• you can say 113 degrees without fainting.
• you eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off.
• you can make instant sun tea.
• you learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.
• the temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly.
• you've experienced condensation on your butt from the hot water in the toilet bowl.
• you would give anything to be able to splash cold water on your face.
• you can attend any function wearing shorts and a tank top.
• The 4 seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!
• you discover that in July, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car.
• you discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window.
• you notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
• hot water now comes out of both taps.
• it's noon in June, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets.
• you actually burn your hand opening the car door.
• you break a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m. before work.
• no one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning.
• your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
• you realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
• a sad Arizonan once prayed, "I wish it would rain - not so much for me, cuz I've seen it -- but for my 7-year-old."

Thankfully, today is Ice Cream Soda Day!!!

[Gay State Conservative]

Unfortunately,I'm not within 300 miles of any of these stations.

[Gay State Conservative]

How about Poisoning Pigeons in the Park? Always a classic!

Tom Lehrer did lots of great stuff.Check it out if you're only familiar with "Pigeons".

[Lucky9teen]

THE Right Brain vs Left Brain test ... do you see the dancer turning clockwise or anti-clockwise?



If clockwise, then you use more of the right side of the brain and vice versa.

Most of us would see the dancer turning anti-clockwise though you can try to focus and change the direction; see if you can do it.

LEFT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses logic
detail oriented
facts rule
words and language
present and past
math and science
can comprehend
knowing
acknowledges
order/pattern perception
knows object name
reality based
forms strategies
practical
safe

RIGHT BRAIN FUNCTIONS
uses feeling
"big picture" oriented
imagination rules
symbols and images
present and future
philosophy & religion
can "get it" (i.e. meaning)
believes
appreciates
spatial perception
knows object function
fantasy based
presents possibilities
impetuous
risk taking

[Chanticleer]

I love Tom Lehrer. A lot of his stuff is on YouTube now.

[Lucky9teen]

I wonder if any have internet broadcasting?

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

I remember Dead Puppies, Fish heads, Last Will and Temperament, Friendly Neighborhood Narco Agent, etc...

GOOD TIMES!!

[Lucky9teen]

Remember not to follow too close

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

Clockwise...

[BJClinton]

groan

[Lucky9teen]

Remember cassette tapes?

[Chanticleer]

clockwise

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

Yep, I am old enough to remember them...still have some too.

[spotbust1]

Garfield on the oil crisis

A lot of folks can't understand how we came

To have an oil shortage here in our country.

Well, there's a very simple answer.

Nobody bothered to check the oil.

We just didn't know we were getting low.

The reason for that is purely geographical.

Our OIL is located in:

ALASKA

California

Coastal Florida

Coastal Louisiana

Kansas

Oklahoma

Pennsylvania

And

Texas

Our DIPSTICKS are located in Washington, DC !!!

Any Questions ???

NO? I didn't think so!!!

[Lucky9teen]

[Chanticleer]

Sistah!

Pretty accurate for me. How about you?

[Lucky9teen]

Can you guys get her to change direction? It’s trippy if you can....

Stare at the leg that’s straight...and she’ll turn the opposite direction

[spotbust1]

I wrote: there was a song about two bald headed men sitting side by side, but I forget the rest of it

I remembered it. Bra size 45.

[Twinkie]

Well Jersey Republican Biker Chick and Twinkie aren’t chopped liver you know!

[spotbust1]

Oops meant to ping you to 117, not myself.

[Jersey Republican Biker Chick]

Kinda, but i never fit in one set list.