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Official Friday Silliness Thread Salutes Business, Advertising, and The Boss
Intriguing.com ^ | August 4, 2006 | Sully777

Posted on 08/04/2006 1:08:59 AM PDT by sully777



Adrian Wapcaplet (W): Aah, come in, come in, Mr....Simpson. Aaah, welcome to Mousebat, Follicle, Goosecreature, Ampersand, Spong, Wapcaplet, Looseliver, Vendetta and Prang!
Mr. Simpson (S): Thank you.
Mr. Wapcaplet: Do sit down--my name's Wapcaplet, Adrian Wapcaplet...
Simpson: how'd'y'do.
Wapcaplet: Now, Mr. Simpson... Simpson, Simpson... French, is it?
S: No.
W: Aah. Now, I understand you want us to advertise your washing powder.
S: String.
W: String, washing powder, what's the difference. We can sell *anything*.
S: Good. Well I have this large quantity of string, a hundred and twenty-two thousand *miles* of it to be exact, which I inherited, and I thought if I advertised it...
W: Of course! A national campaign. Useful stuff, string, no trouble there.
S: Ah, but there's a snag, you see. Due to bad planning, the hundred and twenty-two thousand miles is in three inch lengths. So it's not very useful.
W: Well, that's our selling point! "SIMPSON'S INDIVIDUAL STRINGETTES!"
S: What?
W: "THE NOW STRING! READY CUT, EASY TO HANDLE, SIMPSON'S INDIVIDUAL EMPEROR STRINGETTES - JUST THE RIGHT LENGTH!"
S: For what?
W: "A MILLION HOUSEHOLD USES!"
S: Such as?
W: Uhmm...Tying up very small parcels, attatching notes to pigeons' legs, uh, destroying household pests...
S: Destroying household pests?! How?
W: Well, if they're bigger than a mouse, you can strangle them with it, and if they're smaller than, you flog them to death with it!
S: Well *surely*!....
W: "DESTROY NINETY-NINE PERCENT OF KNOWN HOUSEHOLD PESTS WITH PRE-SLICED, RUSTPROOF, EASY-TO-HANDLE, LOW CALORIE SIMPSON'S INDIVIDUAL EMPEROR STRINGETTES, FREE FROM ARTIFICIAL COLORING, AS USED IN HOSPITALS!" (Click Source-link for conclusion )


TOPICS: Arts/Photography; Cheese, Moose, Sister; Chit/Chat; Conspiracy; Education; Gardening; Hobbies; Humor; Miscellaneous; Music/Entertainment; Outdoors; Pets/Animals; Society; TV/Movies; UFO's; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: 247365; ads; advertising; business; dancingforjoy; friday; mentos; ofst247; silly; woowoo; working4theweekend
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To: Izzy Dunne

41 posted on 08/04/2006 6:12:12 AM PDT by CJ Wolf
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To: PBRSTREETGANG

LOL! People have WAY too much time on their hands!


42 posted on 08/04/2006 6:15:34 AM PDT by Pyro7480 ("Love is the fusion of two souls in one in order to bring about mutual perfection." -S. Terese Andes)
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To: PBRSTREETGANG

LOL! People have WAY too much time on their hands!


43 posted on 08/04/2006 6:15:34 AM PDT by Pyro7480 ("Love is the fusion of two souls in one in order to bring about mutual perfection." -S. Terese Andes)
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To: sully777

44 posted on 08/04/2006 6:22:31 AM PDT by The_Victor (If all I want is a warm feeling, I should just wet my pants.)
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To: sully777; new cruelty
Bad, but funny adversiting...


45 posted on 08/04/2006 6:23:00 AM PDT by MotleyGirl70
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To: The_Victor
Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Get your motor runnin'

Head out for the highway

Looking for adventure

In whatever comes your way...

46 posted on 08/04/2006 6:26:02 AM PDT by Sax (You Done Tore Out My Heart And Stomped That Sucker Flat)
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To: sully777

Boss

A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical looking parrots on a perch and says: "The parrot on the left costs 500 dollars".
"Why, does the parrot cost so much?" asks the man. The owner says, "Well the parrot knows how to use a computer".

The man then asks about the next parrot and is told that this one costs 1,000 dollars because it can do everything the first parrot can do plus it knows how to use the UNIX operating system.

Naturally, the increasingly startled man asks about the third parrot and

is told that it costs 2,000 dollars. Needless to say this begs the question, "What can it do?"

To which the owner replies, "To be honest I have never seen it do a thing but the other two call him boss!"


47 posted on 08/04/2006 6:35:58 AM PDT by Riddick
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To: Sax

48 posted on 08/04/2006 6:37:12 AM PDT by fredhead (Women want me....Fish fear me....I can dream can't I?)
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Comment #49 Removed by Moderator

To: sully777

top 50!


50 posted on 08/04/2006 7:10:59 AM PDT by absolootezer0 ("My God, why have you forsaken us.. no wait, its the liberals that have forsaken you... my bad")
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To: absolootezer0

I own this page!!!


51 posted on 08/04/2006 7:13:04 AM PDT by fredhead (Women want me....Fish fear me....I can dream can't I?)
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To: sully777
Good morning. What's the latest on the bombing in Beruit?

Bombing in Beruit? This is the Official Friday Silliness Thread!

Oh, I see. So do you have the scoop on Hezbollah staging a building collapse and blaming it on the IDF?

Look, I know that sounds silly, but it isn't silly. It's real and, therefore, quite sad. This is the Official Friday Silliness Thread. We don't do the war in Lebanon.

So sorry. Well, do you have the vote total on the minimum wage-death tax bill in the Senate?

NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! Look, my friend, I know the Senate seems silly, especially when Ted Kennedy and Barbara Boxer speak, but it's not silly. It's CURRENT EVENTS. This is the Official Friday Silliness Thread. We do SILL-EEE NESS, not CURR-RENT EEE-VENTS. Capice?

I see. So the latest anti-semitic rantings of the President of Iran?

Not silly!

Mel Gibson's DUI arrest?

Not silly!

A baseball team offering a Britteny Spears Child Safety Day?

Now you're making things up.

Not so, I saw that on Drudge this morning.

I say, that should be silly. Are you sure that one's real?

Quite sure.

I'm not sure I know the difference between reality and silliness, then, except for the bombing in Lebanon. When people die, it's not silly.

I think I understand. So is it true that Al Gore and John Kerry are planning to run for President again?

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I give UP.

Shalom.

52 posted on 08/04/2006 7:14:51 AM PDT by ArGee (The Ring must not be allowed to fall into Hillary's hands!)
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To: ArGee

53 posted on 08/04/2006 7:24:30 AM PDT by CJ Wolf
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To: CJ Wolf

54 posted on 08/04/2006 7:26:02 AM PDT by CJ Wolf
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To: ArGee
Which is silliness?
55 posted on 08/04/2006 7:26:03 AM PDT by fredhead (Women want me....Fish fear me....I can dream can't I?)
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To: sully777

Happy Friday! :)


56 posted on 08/04/2006 7:26:19 AM PDT by EX52D (Life is a stage, and we are merely players...)
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To: EX52D
Friday...the day to get fried
57 posted on 08/04/2006 7:28:30 AM PDT by fredhead (Women want me....Fish fear me....I can dream can't I?)
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To: fredhead

I'll get the shot glasses...:)


58 posted on 08/04/2006 7:30:34 AM PDT by EX52D (Life is a stage, and we are merely players...)
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To: sully777

It was on display in the bottom of a locked filing cabinet stuck in a disused lavatory with a sign on the door saying 'Beware of the Leopard'.

Ever thought of going into advertising?


59 posted on 08/04/2006 7:32:24 AM PDT by Lost Dutchman (No practical definition of freedom would be complete without the freedom to take the consequences.)
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To: sully777

That video was too funny, and it went a ways toward restoring my faith in music videos.

Plus, Beavis and Butt-Head watching it was hilarious, and Beavis cannot say "Nirvana" to save his life.


60 posted on 08/04/2006 7:35:36 AM PDT by Xenalyte (who is having the best day ever!)
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