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**** OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINES THREAD - LITE ****
All of us ^ | 6/10/05 | F/A

Posted on 06/10/2005 6:01:56 AM PDT by Fierce Allegiance

TheBigB has given me the go-ahead to put up this weeks OFST. Thanks, B! Hurry back!

Last week we had some rough spots, so R-Q-TEK86 had the following ground-rules suggestion for this weeks thread:

By entering this silly thread, I promise to…

Honor the spirit of silliness. Eat Spam, eggs, Spam, Spam and Spam. Not ask to see any of Jersey Republican Biker Chick’s body parts. Stand on my desk, flap my arms and make sounds like a chicken. Spew milk through my nose at something ArGee posts. Make at least one blonde joke. Post a joke that makes people groan. Ponder the question “Is ‘Civil Engineer’ an oxymoron?” Try to solve the mystery of who ctlpdad really is. Make a reference to AYBABTU. Disavow everything that Howard Dean stands for. Post a “Pearls Before Swine” cartoon (Dog Gone only). Make the guy in the next cubicle wonder what’s so funny. Post a picture of my favorite refreshing beverage. Quack like the Aflac duck. Not post gratuitous cheesecake or beefcake pictures. Tell JimWforBush a joke about engineers. Make a pun. Use “series” instead of “serious” and “hugh” instead of “huge”. Ask r-q-tek86 if all architects are gay. Stand facing the back of the elevator on the way back from lunch. Post a picture that made me snort the first time I saw it. Do a silly walk. Make an obscure reference to “Young Frankenstein”. Ignore this thread.


TOPICS: Agriculture; Cheese, Moose, Sister; Chit/Chat; Conspiracy; Gardening; Hobbies; Humor; Miscellaneous; Music/Entertainment; Outdoors; Pets/Animals; Poetry; Society; Sports; Test Topic, Ignore It; UFO's; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: cheesymoose; cowbells; dirtyoldbabes; dirtyoldmen; hotstuff; moosecheese
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To: Dashing Dasher

An old man and woman were sittin' on the front porch.

All of a sudden, the woman reaches over and WHAM! Smacks the man up side the head.

Hurt and puzzled, the man asks,
"What was THAT for!"

"Fifty years of bad sex!" the old woman replied.

The man sits there a minute, pondering,
and pondering,
and pondering....

Then he reaches over and WHAM! Smacks HER upside the head while yelling--
"Well, THIS is for knowing the difference!"


461 posted on 06/10/2005 9:24:13 AM PDT by najida (Adrenaline, sugar, caffiene and chocolate....breakfast of champions.)
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To: Fierce Allegiance
She still is very healthy!

Plastic doesn't age, does it?

By the way, if you like Christie Brinkley you'll love this.

<Christie Brinkley as the redhead in Billy Joel's "Keepin the Faith">

Man, that's a great pic.

Shalom.

462 posted on 06/10/2005 9:24:55 AM PDT by ArGee (Why do we let the abnormal tell us what's normal?)
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To: ArGee

Why are men 'beef', but women have to be 'cheese'??


463 posted on 06/10/2005 9:25:20 AM PDT by LongElegantLegs ("Se habla, MoFo!")
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To: Auntbee

>> The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing of a$$holes. <<

So true. So true!!!!!!


464 posted on 06/10/2005 9:25:22 AM PDT by appalachian_dweller (Until the borders are closed there is NO security. Get Prepared. Stay Prepared.)
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To: Dashing Dasher

I am sure that I am not the first to post this link, and I do not have time to know for sure. That Bert stuff sure cracked me up when I first saw it several years ago.


http://www.bertisevil.tv/


465 posted on 06/10/2005 9:25:45 AM PDT by Radix (Don't worry, I have Florida officials working on getting the goons who kidnapped my Tag Line.)
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To: najida

When my hubby gets back with the digital camera, I'm going to download pictures of him in his dress whites and put them on my profile page.

He looks so good in that uniform!

Is it normal to fantasize about your own husband? ;-)


466 posted on 06/10/2005 9:25:55 AM PDT by SilentServiceCPOWife (We are merely players, performers & portrayers, each another's audience outside the gilded cage)
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To: Dashing Dasher; thag
"Can thag shag solo?"

thag shags with all of the FReeperettes. Remember we pass him around like a bag of Fritos.

467 posted on 06/10/2005 9:26:14 AM PDT by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (People too weak to follow their own dreams, will always find a way to discourage yours.)
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To: ArGee

Got it. No big deal. Post all the imaginary cheese to me you want.


468 posted on 06/10/2005 9:26:25 AM PDT by Auntbee (Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.)
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To: Fierce Allegiance
Look Close at the picture....


469 posted on 06/10/2005 9:26:28 AM PDT by Dallas59 (" I have a great team that is going to beat George W. Bush" John Kerry -2004)
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To: Dashing Dasher
I read back and realized my post came off as harsh - it was supposed to come off as silly.

Sorry about that.

I will walk around the rest of the day with SPAM on my head as a gesture of atonement.

Well, not really, but you'll never know.

Shalom.

470 posted on 06/10/2005 9:26:45 AM PDT by ArGee (Why do we let the abnormal tell us what's normal?)
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To: Dillybird

LOL!


471 posted on 06/10/2005 9:27:15 AM PDT by Dallas59 (" I have a great team that is going to beat George W. Bush" John Kerry -2004)
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Comment #472 Removed by Moderator

To: SilentServiceCPOWife

I do it all the time...that just means you're satisfied. ;)


473 posted on 06/10/2005 9:27:19 AM PDT by EX52D
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To: EX52D

See my post #466. :-)


474 posted on 06/10/2005 9:27:22 AM PDT by SilentServiceCPOWife (We are merely players, performers & portrayers, each another's audience outside the gilded cage)
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To: SilentServiceCPOWife
"Mom, guess what? My name was on a list of people guaranteed to lower the tenor of conversations on Free Republic. It's ok, Mom. Don't cry. I know you're proud."

Under my name in the high school yearbook is this phrase:

Most likely to degrade the gene pool.

Shalom.

475 posted on 06/10/2005 9:27:35 AM PDT by ArGee (Why do we let the abnormal tell us what's normal?)
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To: najida

476 posted on 06/10/2005 9:27:50 AM PDT by Dashing Dasher (Ailerons make the world go 'round!)
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To: fredhead

>A family is sitting around the supper table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of breasts are there?
>
>The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a women's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions." "Onions?" "Yes, see them and they make you cry."
>
>This infuriated the wife and daughter so the daughter said, "Mum, how many kinds of willies are there?"
>
>The mother, surprised, smiles and looks at her daughter and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In a man's twenties, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree "

"A Christmas tree?"

"Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only"
>


477 posted on 06/10/2005 9:28:16 AM PDT by peacebaby (Hillary Clinton as president of America, over my dead body.)
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To: Dashing Dasher

That figurine was on top of my Wedding Rehearsal Cake

Kicking and Screaming all the way. (not really)


478 posted on 06/10/2005 9:28:19 AM PDT by hattend (Alaska....in a time warp all it's own!)
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To: SilentServiceCPOWife

Gotcha! ;)


479 posted on 06/10/2005 9:28:34 AM PDT by EX52D
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To: LongElegantLegs
"Why are men 'beef', but women have to be 'cheese'??"

Because when you put the beef and cheese together it makes a great sandwich!!!!

480 posted on 06/10/2005 9:28:44 AM PDT by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (People too weak to follow their own dreams, will always find a way to discourage yours.)
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