Posted on 04/21/2025 11:31:52 AM PDT by DFG
GLORY — The afterlife of one of the world's most prominent religious figures got off to an awkward start today, as Saint Peter reportedly asked the newly arrived Francis if he could have his pope hat back.
Witnesses said the uncomfortable interaction occurred just after Pope Francis approached the pearly gates, with the revered Simon Peter allegedly confronting him to ask for the return of his special papal headdress.
"Would you mind handing that over to me, bruh?" Peter reportedly asked. "I'm sure you've taken good care of it for me, but… you know… I'd appreciate it if I could have it back. First pope over here. Thanks."
Angels present for the conversation said the most recent pope was caught off guard by the abrupt request made by the original pope. "Ah, yes… the hat," Francis replied. "Well, you see, Peter, this tiara was custom-fitted for my head. It's rather unlikely it would suit you. Many things in the Church have changed since you left, sir. I'm rather fond of the hat, honestly. I like it better than the little white beanie thing they had us wear most of the time."
Other heavenly dignitaries allegedly intervened after Peter stepped up closer to Francis, hoping to diffuse the situation. "It looked like it might get heated," a spokesangel said. "Hopefully, things cool off a bit. Peter tends to be a bit of a hothead."
At publishing time, there were new reports of tension after Francis noticed Peter's "World's Best Pope" coffee mug.
Francis won’t need that miter in hell.
Love the Bee.
It's good you know Francis's heart.
I'm sure Jesus often consults you on who should enter Heaven.
I don’t get the joke.
“...noticed Peter’s “World’s Best Pope” coffee mug.”
LOL!
Apostle Paul: Neither of you are my pope. I'll wear a cucullus, thank you.
Apostle Mark: Hats are for wusses. I'll keep my cross tattoo on my wrist.
Tip: "dastar" is the name of a hat worn by the ancient Celts who invaded the area of Gauls (Galatians, the writing of which had the dispute between Paul and Peter). Thomas took the Gospel to India: a traditional hat there is Dastar. And Mark took the Gospel to Egypt -- the Coptic men there often don't wear hats but do have a cross tattoo on the inside of a wrist.
As is often said: presuming we get to heaven, we will be surprised to see people there we thought would not be there, and surprised to not see people there we thought would be there. On this side of the veil, only God knows for sure, and we ain’t him.
Mark was not an apostle.
My bad. Thanks for the correction. I should better review my copy/paste.
wow. I’m a Protestant and I the only one here who thinks this thread is in poor taste. I don’t get the joke either.
Da-gon! There’s definitely something fishy about all tHAT!
I don’t know how official these rankings are.
I think Bob Sacamano can get him a replacement hat. Otherwise he will have to go to Burma and find Mr Peterson who I hear is quite mad.
Don't tell the Bee, but nobody except "The Young Pope" has worn the tiara in the last 60 years.
Well the fruit he bore was pagan and secular.
Last year Italy and Vatican closed 150 Churches, if another liberal Pope is elected they will have to close 1500 churches. Rome needs Vigano to turn the Church back to Christ’s Teachings, without Vigano, there may be a Islamic Flag flying over St. Peters. Vat II must be reversed so Christ’s Teachings may flourish. The Wrath of God is Upon Us.
Last year Italy and Vatican closed 150 Churches, if another liberal Pope is elected they will have to close 1500 churches. Rome needs Vigano to turn the Church back to Christ’s Teachings, without Vigano, there may be a Islamic Flag flying over St. Peters. Vat II must be reversed so Christ’s Teachings may flourish. The Wrath of God is Upon Us.
Beelezebub has a demon set aside for him.
Or he could borrow George Costanza’s nutria rat hat.
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