Keyword: satire
-
Saying he "is putting the country ahead of partisanship," former House Speaker Newt Gingrich announced his availability as a vice-presidential running mate "for either candidate." Speculation about such a possibility heated up this week when Gingrich called Hillary Clinton's speech after she clinched enough delegates for the Democratic presidential nomination "spectacular." Earlier he had spoken favorably about GOP nominee Donald Trump. "Listening to Hillary the other night I realized what a strong candidate she is," Gingrich said. "She's got the experience and the gravitas that this country needs. That's not to say that Donald Trump wouldn't also be a good...
-
Democratic presidential aspirant Hillary Clinton demanded that Republican rival Donald Trump discontinue his twitter account. The demand followed Trump's tweet mocking President Obama's endorsement of Clinton's candidacy. In the tweet, Trump wrote "Obama just endorsed Crooked Hillary. He wants four more years of Obama-but nobody else does!" "Trump's tweet was disrespectful to President Obama and to me," Hillary complained. "This is further proof that he lacks the temperament to be president. Those of us with experience in government know that there are certain things you just don't say in public. One of those things is that you don't call your...
-
Mark Toner, spokesman for the US State Department, issued a statement condemning the terrorist attack on a shopping mall that killed four Israelis, but simultaneously warned Israel to "not overreact." In an effort to beef up security in response to the attack, the Israeli government rescinded 83,000 permits for Palestinians to visit relatives in Israel during Ramadan and sent an additional 600 troops to the West Bank where they will man border checkpoints and conduct raids against suspected terrorists. "That four innocent shoppers were murdered is tragic, but we want to caution the Israeli government against taking measures that might...
-
This week the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals ruled that government has a right to decide who will and won't be permitted to carry a concealed firearm. The ruling came in the case of Edward Peruta v. County of San Diego. The County denied Peruta and his fellow plaintiffs concealed carry permits on the grounds that they did not prove a need for them. Writing for the majority, Judge Diarmuid O'Scannlain asserted that "under California law, police authorities are empowered to determine who shall be allowed to bear arms and for what reasons. The plaintiffs' contention that personal self-defense was...
-
Tourism chiefs in Southend On Sea have announced that three beaches on the seafront will run a trial this summer where ladies will be asked to cover up while sunbathing. According to an email that has been seen by Southend News Network, these so-called ‘Modesty Beach Areas’ will be set up to attract visitors from all over the UK who may be uncomfortable with the sight of ‘excessive bare female skin’ for a number of either cultural or religious reasons.
-
In response to an audience member's concern that Democrats want to take guns away from law-abiding people, President Obama sought to reassure the man that his fears were exaggerated. "The notion that I, or Hillary or Democrats or whoever want to personally grab everyone's guns is just not true," he said. "I would never grab anyone's gun, but I think we can all agree that there are some dangerous elements in our society who ought not to have them." "What we need are sensible controls over who can and can't have guns," the President continued. "Who can better make this...
-
WHY I QUIT MY JOB TO TRAVEL THE WORLD (New Yorker)
-
Though the Bureau of Labor Statistics report for May showed an anemic 38,000 new jobs were created during the month and a record 94,708,000 Americans were not in the labor force, Obama Administration Press Secretary Josh Earnest insisted that "we are not disappointed with these numbers." "Those who can't grasp the President's goals for the transformation of this country harp on the point that 38,000 new jobs are far too few to accommodate this country's monthly 200,000 population increase," Earnest complained. "Likewise, they see the expansion of the contingent not in the workforce as a negative. They've got it exactly...
-
California State Assemblyman Jimmy Gomez (D-Los Angeles) is sponsoring legislation that would criminalize undercover reporting of misdeeds occurring at abortion facilities. The bill A.B. 1671, imposes penalties of up to a year behind bars and/or a $2,500 fine for a first offense. "Abortion is an endorsed practice in this state," Gomez said. "We need to protect its providers from harassment by those who oppose it." Gomez cited "the horrendous invasion of privacy perpetrated by the Center for Medical Progress' undercover videos of Planned Parenthood's negotiations for the sale of baby parts as the primary inspiration for this legislation. The contention...
-
President Obama and Attorney General Loretta Lynch have joined former director of the Phoenix VA Medical Center Sharon Helman’s suit against wrongful termination. Helman was fired in 2014 following the nationwide VA scandal that erupted after it came to light that veterans were dying while waiting for care at the facilities she oversaw. She was also subsequently convicted of a felony after pleading guilty to accepting bribes. Despite this blemished performance in her job, Helman is now contending that her firing was too hasty. Lynch agreed, saying that “the 21-day limit for filing an appeal of the firing was too...
-
Attendees of a Donald Trump presidential rally in San Jose, California were set upon and beaten by anti-Trump “protesters” this past week. Mayor Sam Liccardo blamed the candidate. “I personally would never physically attack a political opponent,” Liccardo reassured. “But neither am I ready to absolve Trump for his role in provoking the violence. California was once part of Mexico before it was illegally seized by the United States in 1848. Donald Trump hasn’t denounced this thievery. To the contrary, he has stridently threatened to eject Mexicans who are trying to repatriate this territory.” “San Jose is a sanctuary city,”...
-
The following is an Op-Ed by the Editors of Salon.com Following U.S. President Barack Obama’s inspiring visit to Hiroshima, it’s important to reconsider the most important lesson we’ve learned since the ending of WWII: we should have let the Axis win. Bigots will no doubt try to factsplain the notion that Japan attacked the United States at Pearl Harbor first. It’s simply more of their typical use of historical privilege, justifying a tradition of victim blaming and vilification of minorities. The only reason the aircraft that dropped the bomb on Hiroshima was named Enola Gay was so the military industrial...
-
Former Clinton Administration Secretary of State Madeleine Albright suggested that the inquiry into Hillary Clinton's email practices during her tenure as Obama's Secretary of State "has gone far enough." "Okay, she made a mistake and some laws may have been broken, but there's no proof that the way she handled her email has hurt anyone," Albright contended. "It's time for the persecution of this great American to end." The possibility that Hillary's unsecured emails containing classified material might have been hacked and, thereby, exposed covert operatives to potentially fatal risk was brushed aside. "There's no definitive proof that her emails...
-
White teenage unemployment is about 14 percent. That for black teenagers is about 30 percent. The labor force participation rate for white teens is 37 percent, and that for black teens is 25 percent. Many years ago, in 1948, the figures were exactly the opposite. The unemployment rate of black 16-year-old and 17-year-old males was 9.4 percent, while that of whites was 10.2 percent. Up until the late 1950s, black teens, as well as black adults, were more active in the labor market than their white counterparts. I will return to these facts after I point out some elitist arrogance...
-
The 2017 Intelligence Authorization Act would enable the FBI to obtain anyone's email records without a court order. All the agency would need is a National Security Letter, which would allow the FBI get information from companies without their customers knowing they were being investigated. The bill is co-sponsored by Senate Intelligence Committee Chairman Richard Burr (R-NC) and Vice Chairman Dianne Feinstein (D-Calif). "If we want the government to protect us we must let go of our obsession with personal privacy," Sen. Feinstein urged. "The police are consummate professionals, not nosy busybodies. Unless you're doing something wrong you have nothing...
-
In a 4-3 ruling, the Iowa Supreme Court banned lower courts from imposing life sentences for murders committed by teen-aged offenders. The ruling came in the case of Isaiah Richard Sweet, who was convicted of two counts of first-degree murder for fatally shooting his grandparents. Justice Brent Appel wrote that "a life sentence for a crime such as this is disproportionate. The victims were old and fairly close to a natural death. For their grandson to be sentenced to a life term that could easily amount to multiple decades is a punishment that I believe the victims themselves would have...
-
Contending that "so-called free speech is delusional," DePaul University sociology professor Dr. Shu-Ju Cheng has resigned her post in protest. The event that spurred Dr. Cheng's protest was the aborted speech of Milo Yiannopolis on the University's campus last week. Despite paying the University for security, student thugs were permitted to seize the stage and disrupt the speech. Cheng was outraged, not that thugs were allowed to drown out views with which they disagreed, but that Yiannopolis was invited "to air his anti-progressive message." "The whole concept of freedom of speech is an antiquated idea derived from dead white men,"...
-
This week, Secretary of Veterans Affairs Robert McDonald rebuffed critics of the agency’s long queues for medical treatment of ailing veterans, comparing them to the long lines to get on rides at Disneyland. “No one is on the Disney Corporation’s case for the lengthy wait-times at their theme parks,” McDonald asserted. “Why should we get worked up over wait-times at VA hospitals?” “You know, if people can tolerate waiting an hour for something as frivolous as a roller coaster ride shouldn’t they be willing to wait a reasonable amount of time for something as crucial as medical care?” the Secretary...
-
Irritated that the media would dare to pose a question about the legality of former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's unsecured email communications, President Obama refused to comment, suggesting that "whether she did anything that was really wrong is a matter for voters to decide. And from what I've seen so far, she's on her way to securing the Democratic nomination for president. I think that says the majority of Americans are okay with how she's handled it." The media's unwelcome inquiry was spurred by an 83-page State Department Inspector General's report calling Clinton's email operation an "inexcusable and willful...
-
The Communist Party of the United States (CPUSA) has enthusiastically endorsed "comrade Bernie Sanders as the progressive choice to complete the socialist revolution in America," but pledged its "support for whoever emerges with the Democratic Party's presidential nomination." John Bachtell, national chair of the CPUSA expressed his "pleasure with the progressive evolution of the Democratic Party. The Communist agenda has been totally absorbed by this mainstream Party. President Obama has taken this country further down the road than we could ever have hoped to do on our own. Although Bernie has been a long-time member of the revolutionary movement, Secretary...
|
|
|