Vanilla Ice: "Ice Ice Baby" translated into Latin

Livejournal.com ^ | 01/17/2005 | cataptromancer (Livejournal)

[Constitution Day]

In the noble tradition of De clunibus magnis amandis oratio (Baby Got Back), I bring you:

---

Gelu, O Gelu, Cara
VANILLÆ GELUS

doo doo doo, doo-doo-doo-doo
doo doo doo, doo-doo-doo-doo...

Etenim, siste, me iuva, auscultaque
(Indeed: Halt, aid me, and take heed)
Gelu redivit cum inventione novissima
(Frost has returned with a very new invention)
Nescioquid me constringit
(Something constrains me)
Fluo ceu hasta baleanarum necandarum noctu et quotidie
(I flow in the manner of a whale-killing spear daily and by night)
Umquam hoc desistetne? Ego dubito.
(Shall this ever cease? I myself doubt it.)
Lucernis restinctis luceam
(When the lamps are extinguished I shall shed light)
Ad ultimum flecto microphonem ut vandal
(I bend the microphone to the furthest point like a Germanic tribesman)
Scenam illumino et ineptum incero etsi candelam faciam
(I brighten the stage and cover an inept man in wax as if I were making a taper)
Salta, rue ad originem sonituum resonantium
(Dance, hasten to the source of resounding noises)
Sic cerebrum tuum laedo quomodo Claudium Imperatorem Agrippina Neroque interfecrunt
(I am wounding your brain in the manner that Agrippina and Nero killed the Emperor Claudius)
Letalis sum, quando cantum validum modulor
(I am fatal when I warble a hearty tune)
Quicquid peius optimo nefas
(Anything worse than the best is blasphemy)
Aut id ama aut discede, gravitatem tuam augere oportet
(Either love it or leave, you ought to increase your weightiness)
Debes tendere sagittam ad volucrem traiecto in fune columbam – infans negat
[You ought to aim for the dove hoisted on the rope* – the child refuses]
Si quaestio exsisteret, solutionem offerem
[If there were a debate I should offer a solution]
Carmen meum probas dum discafer meus revolvit
(Evaluate my refrain while my disk-bearer revolves)

Gelu, O Gelu, Cara
[Frost. O, Frost, Darling!]
*-Virgil, Æneid VI.

[The Spirit Of Allegiance]

This really needs to be in "Breaking News" Breaking Wind.

[r9etb]

That pic gives me the willies every time you post it. Eeeew.

[MotleyGirl70]

WHITE, WHITE BABY (Jim Carey being Vanilla Ice from In Living Color) FUNNY

Word ta ya mutha!

[Dashing Dasher]

Well - stop asking for it and I'll stop posting it!

How about this one instead!?

[Bear_Slayer]

Also known as Alex-Zivojinovich.

About the only good thing to come out of Canada.

Alex Lifeson

Ok maybe these guys too.

[Constitution Day]

Ahh, okay.

I never liked Rush. Why does Geddy Lee sing like a girl, anyway? :)

[DollyCali]

Hi martin, I used some of your work (and gave you credit) over HERE

[mewzilla]

Semper ubi sub ubi :)

[martin_fierro]

Cool!

Thanx Doli!

< |:)~

[Grammy]

Does anyone else think he is wearing a wig in this picture?
Vanilla Ice--- bald---- wouldn't sell a lot of cd's.

[Little Bill]

Permoveo ut caput capitis. Off the top of my head it ahs been a long time.

[Little Bill]

Permoveo ut caput capitis. Off the top of my head it ahs been a long time.

[rmlew]

I remember doing somthing like this in Eighth Grade Latin.

[ThreeYearLurker]

Rush Rush Baby

[SunkenCiv]

Thanks, CD!

Please FREEPMAIL me if you want on, off, or alter the "Gods, Graves, Glyphs" PING list --
Archaeology/Anthropology/Ancient Cultures/Artifacts/Antiquities, etc.
The GGG Digest -- Gods, Graves, Glyphs (alpha order)

[Textide]

Oh my Dear Lord.

[Petronski]

JVST DAMN

[Constitution Day]

BVMPVS MAXIMVS

[Textide]

Don't ask how I came upon this gem of yours. I can only imagine these guys marching in step with the song. pic from Rome: Total War

[Constitution Day]

MVGSHOT