I rarely divulge details of my personal life on Zooillogix because, frankly, I am quite a catch and I didn't want female readers leaving their husbands. On July 12th however, I (Andrew - the older and wiser one who still has both hands) got married. I tell you this because something horrible happened shortly before the wedding that directly informs this story: my then fiancee forced me to get a pedicure. For years she has begged me to clickity-clack the raptor claws I call toes down to "Nail Bar" but I staunchly refused, as any self-respecting pretend-zoologist must. She was...
